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pointing and laughing,
I'm being told how to live my life
he was running from her
catching the light
chasing it across town
I swallow ***** like water
bruises and felons
we have our feline friends
and I can smell hope
in this apartment
high fives + best friends
drunk bus and acoustic guitar
where are we when you
start to leave us?
lost backpacks give
way to found numbers
I took your favorite piece
of literature and he
laid claim to my thigh
his fingers bruised and
his eyes burned into mine

silver-haired Prince, where
did you go?
You grow with the stars
and yes, I am interested.

let's call her Mindi
wow, drunk.
Max is in the corner, coughing up blood.
Mushrooms and pipe dreams intermingle above our heads.
Birthday cards,
gin and tonics,
well-wishes scattered throughout the room.

His (pleading) eyes never left my face.

There’s a couple of lovers left,
before the sad sets in.
I love the straight of your nose and the set of your mouth.

Smoky lights embrace the night.
Guys are ***** w/ red solo cups.
(sorry, he’s too drunk)
Keep going until the
goldschlagger...

here’s to Nat,
tall like a tree and just as wise,
quiet kind.
(quite the friend)

After we left, you found me in the kitchen.
Words don’t matter so much as
that earnest apology and the warmth
of your arms around me.
Aroused and angry,
I thought to beat the alarum, and urge relentless war;
But soon my fingers fail’d me, my face droop’d, and I resign’d myself,
To sit by the wounded and soothe them, or silently watch the dead.

1

First, O songs, for a prelude,
Lightly strike on the stretch’d tympanum, pride and joy in my city,
How she led the rest to arms—how she gave the cue,
How at once with lithe limbs, unwaiting a moment, she sprang;
(O superb! O Manhattan, my own, my peerless!
O strongest you in the hour of danger, in crisis! O truer than steel!)
How you sprang! how you threw off the costumes of peace with indifferent hand;
How your soft opera-music changed, and the drum and fife were heard in their stead;
How you led to the war, (that shall serve for our prelude, songs of soldiers,)
How Manhattan drum-taps led.

2

Forty years had I in my city seen soldiers parading;
Forty years as a pageant—till unawares, the Lady of this teeming and turbulent city,
Sleepless amid her ships, her houses, her incalculable wealth,
With her million children around her—suddenly,
At dead of night, at news from the south,
Incens’d, struck with clench’d hand the pavement.

A shock electric—the night sustain’d it;
Till with ominous hum, our hive at day-break pour’d out its myriads.

From the houses then, and the workshops, and through all the doorways,
Leapt they tumultuous—and lo! Manhattan arming.

3

To the drum-taps prompt,
The young men falling in and arming;
The mechanics arming, (the trowel, the jack-plane, the blacksmith’s hammer, tost aside with precipitation;)
The lawyer leaving his office, and arming—the judge leaving the court;
The driver deserting his wagon in the street, jumping down, throwing the reins abruptly down on the horses’ backs;
The salesman leaving the store—the boss, book-keeper, porter, all leaving;
Squads gather everywhere by common consent, and arm;
The new recruits, even boys—the old men show them how to wear their accoutrements—they buckle the straps carefully;
Outdoors arming—indoors arming—the flash of the musket-barrels;
The white tents cluster in camps—the arm’d sentries around—the sunrise cannon, and again at sunset;
Arm’d regiments arrive every day, pass through the city, and embark from the wharves;
(How good they look, as they ***** down to the river, sweaty, with their guns on their shoulders!
How I love them! how I could hug them, with their brown faces, and their clothes and knapsacks cover’d with dust!)
The blood of the city up—arm’d! arm’d! the cry everywhere;
The flags flung out from the steeples of churches, and from all the public buildings and stores;
The tearful parting—the mother kisses her son—the son kisses his mother;
(Loth is the mother to part—yet not a word does she speak to detain him;)
The tumultuous escort—the ranks of policemen preceding, clearing the way;
The unpent enthusiasm—the wild cheers of the crowd for their favorites;
The artillery—the silent cannons, bright as gold, drawn along, rumble lightly over the stones;
(Silent cannons—soon to cease your silence!
Soon, unlimber’d, to begin the red business;)
All the mutter of preparation—all the determin’d arming;
The hospital service—the lint, bandages, and medicines;
The women volunteering for nurses—the work begun for, in earnest—no mere parade now;
War! an arm’d race is advancing!—the welcome for battle—no turning away;
War! be it weeks, months, or years—an arm’d race is advancing to welcome it.

4

Mannahatta a-march!—and it’s O to sing it well!
It’s O for a manly life in the camp!
And the sturdy artillery!
The guns, bright as gold—the work for giants—to serve well the guns:
Unlimber them! no more, as the past forty years, for salutes for courtesies merely;
Put in something else now besides powder and wadding.

5

And you, Lady of Ships! you Mannahatta!
Old matron of this proud, friendly, turbulent city!
Often in peace and wealth you were pensive, or covertly frown’d amid all your children;
But now you smile with joy, exulting old Mannahatta!
I wrote my heart away with the blood
From the gashes you made in my soul.

I strung together words and orchestrated metaphors
To bring life into the pain you brought into my life.

I created you to be better
Than what you actually were.

I strained—
I pressed on to get where I am today.

How foolish of me to think the sun shined from your ***
When it was really hell gasping for air.
To the one who catapulted me to where I am today, thank you.
I'd rather have bad days with you,
Than good days without you.
Don't be so vain to think you're a *******.
I'm the whole log of ****.
Heaven has enough poets,
Satan needs a new advocate.
Something I told Paul hahaha. I thought it was pretty witty and clever
I wore  
a camouflaged
T-shirt
for the first
7 years of
my life.

I couldn't have
been no more
than 5 or 6
when my father
first put a Mini14
into my small eager
young hands.

I had been raised
on the Ruger and the
20 Gauge.
Both of
which I had
mastered
long before
my ABC's.

He felt I
was ready
and somehow
I knew I was too.

I learned how
to shoot from
the shoulder
before I could
ride a bicycle.
I was dismantling
assault rifles
around the time I
learned how
to swim.



"You're shooting too high"
he'd  say near my face.
That familiar scent of
spearmint  chewing gum
and gunpowder still
lingers along the halls
of my memory.

Where some seen danger
or violence
I found an escape from the
foolish games
I never excelled at as
a short stammering ,
toothless little
boy.

Out here in the open
desert spaces
I am the master of my
weapon, the hunter and
the protector
of these wastelands.

When I take my time
and remember to breath .
The way he taught me to do,
my aim will always ring true.

And this makes him happy.
He praises my skill before
always giving me another lesson
even after I surpassed
his own.

Who would have thought those
steal and paper targets,the clay
pigeons and the
left behind beer bottles
would all one day led up
to all of the choices
that have become.

I was never an
athlete,
never liked sports.
Still don't.
When they cheer over
some ball chasers so
called achievement.
I can't help
but think of
the fact that I
could have hit
that ball in mid
air.
Just like the clay
pigeons I've shattered
by the thousands
as a boy.
 Apr 2015 CastorPolydeuces
Sam
Death sits atop his hill,
giving his lips a lick
looking for someone to ****
regretting forgetting his chapstick
Remember kids. Never lick your lips when they are dry.
 Apr 2015 CastorPolydeuces
Bri
"Don't let madness corrupt you." A wise man once said, but it is impossible not to be corrupted when you're as dark as insanity itself.
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