I hate myself,
I hate myself,

don't you **** ever think I loved myself,

no way in hell could I ever,
I'm ****** sure to never tell,

tell what you ask?

on how I came to hate myself,

on how I came to hate every last thing,
about,
myself.

There is a corner of my mind
That I am frightened to visit
There is a child who sits there
Alone

It is me
Alone
A child
In a corner

A child afraid
In a corner
I want to help myself
But I don’t know how

There is a corner of my mind
That I do not explore
Because I lack courage

I read about hope
Hope and boundless courage
These are the companions
I would like to befriend

Hope
Boundless courage
Courage that knows no bounds

I have been rejected
Time and again
And I become the child
In the corner of my mind

Lost
Frightened
Alone

With courage
With hope
Perhaps I can help the child to stand
Perhaps the adult can carry the child
To safety

Hope
Like a warm glow
Courage
Like a great gust of wind

My stomach feels tight
My chest full of aching discomfort
Wearily
Bleary  eyed
I travel into the predictability of a narrowing future

In spite of everything
I try to help the child to stand

'Don’t worry' I whisper
'I am here for you
I am here to help you stand
I would never scold you
I will only show you kindness'

Carry my body out to sea
Lay my down on rippling tide
Let me float away with the debris
To absorb into the immortal sands

Like a ship turns into a wreck
My bones bow, bend and break
And the creatures explore my skin
My life is forgotten.