my mother has blue eyes
but I'm still a ******
my mother has blonde hair
but I'm still a ******
my daddy is black as night
but I'm still a *******
my daddy has ***** curls
but I'm still a *******

I call this hash tag the struggle
because to be biracial is nothing
more
because to be biracial is nothing
less
than a struggle
to find who I am
to find who I should be
to find who I'm supposed to be

i really wish they were the same person
i really wish you understood hash tag the struggle
but you don't
and you won't

so stop telling me about my
good hair
and stop telling about my high
yellow skin
and stop telling me my parents have the fever
and stop staring at me when I
walk in
and stop trying to guess which parent is black
and stop trying to guess which parent is spanish

No

I'm not Spanish.

No

I don't speak Spanish.

No

You CANNOT touch my hair

Yes, my nose is in the air
Of course I think I'm the ****
Because I live my life trying to be better than women who are dark skinned ...with something I was born with
...out of my control
Of course I try to flaunt my plush lips around the white girls who get botox
who then become the have nots because I've stolen all the brothas hearts from the city and the boondocks

See you don't even know me
but you think these are my goals

see I call this hash tag the struggle because nobody understands the trouble in being whole
when you're given two halves
that don't match to patch up one soul
and you're born into a ****** up mess still expected to know

and they tell you to ignore them all
be yourself
race should not define you
but I can't even fill out two ******* boxes on a standardized test
because you are only allowed to check ONE to describe you

hash tag
**TheStruggle

They once called me crazy
I've since been deemed sane

Is it insanity
When I call out your name

In the middle of the night
Alone in my bed

My heart it bleeds sorrow
I can't hear your name

It drives me to madness
I'm going insane

I can't call you up
I can't knock on your door

Each time I think of you
I'm wanting you more

I wake in the darkness
A terrible fright

I don't feel any warmth now
I can't see the light

I try to forgive you
I try to let go

I still think about you
I thought you should know

I stand up
Leave a rose on your stone

Say my goodbyes
And walk myself home

I walk through the crowd
To go sit down

Music playing
Way too loud

I can't think
I can't breathe

I liked to get up
Walk and leave

I suddenly realize
I'm at home alone

I gotta stay away from that tea!

I lie in my bed
Staring and thinking

Tick tock of the clock
Days thoughts still lingering

I want to slow
My swirling mind

I think if I don't
I'll leave something behind

How can I turn off
These perpetual thoughts

I need a remote
To just hit pause

When I think of you.
I imagine us forgiving each other.
For the past arguments, the fights.

It fathoms me with desire.
To speak one word..
Just one sweet word,
For you to see that I forgive you..

My heart breaks when I don't hear,
See or feel you near..

When I meander about,
Lost and afraid.
I think of you.

My friend,
You are far away..
I wish you were near.
Please live..
Your life fully..

Farewell...

I travel into the great unknown
Through kaleidoscope tunnels
In marshmallow homes

Silly putty writings
Unfold in my lap
Scrawlings from fairies
Under my hat

Bubble gum people
Walk by my stoop
They'll do it again
My day is on loop

The tea was Earl grey
Then it turned blue
I've had a strange evening
How about you?