A human is composed of four things total
Body
Brain
Soul
Heart
These things are incredible
Because they get trampled everyday
Each day your body fights off disease
Or tries to at least
Each day your brain has to decide which
Of the "lessons" thrown your way to absorb
Your soul, everyday, handles hardships and mistreatment
Then shows altruism
But your heart
Oh **** your heart
Each and every single day
Must remember how to love
Must experience some cracking and sometimes full on shatters
Then it must heal so that you might be able
To use the rest of what you're made of
And eventually your heart again
We are all tossed together
Thrown in the oven
Baked
Then in the world we are all
Tossed around by different circumstances
Tossed together by fate
And tossed about for strength

The tick tick ticking of the wall clock
Casts its spell on me
And I start to tumble
Down
  Down
     D
       o
        w
          n
Into my thoughts so deep
I begin to explore the stones unturned
In my mind and I try to sleep
But the burning curiosity of it all
Lulls me in a rocking rhythm
As I venture into thoughts unspoken
Thoughts unheard
Those thoughts were locked away for a reason
I stumble blindly about my own house
Trying to find escape
But instead only see what my madness creates
A false hope
And a broken girl
Strewn about the floor
On occasion entrails dragged across the mantel
When I finally find the couch so near
I sit and cry my fat stained tears
And rock and rock and rock
In hopes it will go away
I don't want to know myself so deeply
Because if I do
How could I possibly think someone will save me
Back and forth and back and forth
Faster and harder I try
Which only pulls me
D
e
  e
   p
    e
     r
Into myself
Until I am completely inside out
Full of fear
Drunk on my one hundred percent
No sanity back guarantee
Mad

I am in need of a poem about healing
But no one seems to be providing
My dosage or prescription
I need a poem that when I read it
I feel like there are arms wrapped tight
Around my shaking body as the tears tumble down
I need a poem that when I read it
I can hear the feeling of home
Comforting me, listening to me
I need a poem that lets me know
I will be okay
And that the only person I truly need
To validate my being is me
But also makes me believe it
I need a poem that lets me know I belong
That I matter
And that even though I sometimes am in the wrong
Lets me believe it will be okay
I need a poem that cries and laughs
Then smiles and sobs some more
I need a poem that cuts like a blade
So that I won't feel the need to find one myself
Not that it's ever far off anyways
But I need a poem that
Breathes

So you got knocked down
A few scrapes here and there
A few cuts in covert wheres
Thrown against a wall
With head bashing into drawers
Crying silent angry ears
That stain with salt
Your hollowed cheeks
Your starved body tries to eat air
And wretches up burning bile
But it will be okay
The wounds on your heart are fresh
Those self inflicted even more so
But eventually all wounds close
The bruise over
And heal
You might not be able
To get along like you used to
But it's okay
Because you aren't who you used to be
Any longer
Now you're soon to be
Bruised and healing and
Stronger

As ****** up as it sounds
After all they share my pain
And I know their boundaries
As messy as they are
I can't help but to love them
With such a wide and open heart
I'm a fixer
It's what I do best
I can fill everyone else's voids and cure
Their aching pains that
Come with your right to breathe at birth
Your right to die inside
I breathe life into their souls
Loosening a weight
Without once filling the cavity in my chest
I like my people broken
As ****** up as it sounds
Because at the very least
I can leave them better than when found

You cannot haunt me anymore
You threw me away
I ran back
You threw me away
I ran back
You threw me away
I ran back
You threw me away
You ran back
I threw you away
I told myself I was done with you
That I didn't need that abuse
That I didn't need you
But then I thought I did
So I ran back
Oh **** was she ******
And I was ****** at me too
After all I went to someone
Who has done nothing but hurt me
Searching for solace
Then I threw you away
I deleted you altogether
But there's still times when I hear that
******* song
And I can't help but cry
There are times when I see a car
That looks just like yours
And I can't help but wonder
This isn't a love poem by any means
You're the one thing I hate
But you're a ghost of my past
I thought I had dropped
Yet find myself still hanging on
Why the **** won't you leave
Me alone
You don't care
And I don't want you
So if your God is real
May He grant me some solace
And rid you from my mind
Because for the last time in forever
Will the ghost of you
And your false declarations of love
Haunt my ****** up as it is
Soul

Hopefully

Remember
But your bicep says
Forget
Your clavicle says
Love
But *hate says your
Chest
Your left bicep reads
Happy
But your forearm needs the reminder
Stop
Your thighs are gardens of beautiful
Butterflies
Your back says you're in need of
Grace
But on the inside where only you can see
Your heart says
*Help

Blue for stereotypical sadness
Red for passionate
Purple for bravery
And emerald for envious
Periwinkle for timid
Burgundy for romantic
Yellow for content
Black for suicidal
Grey for the never ending depression
Orange for elated and high
But in all honesty
My heart has no color
It's just a prism
Refracting my uncontrollable emotions