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As you struggle to sleep next to their naked silhouette
  with the moonlight hitting their skin perfectly
Believing that you could never be an asset in their life,
  only a misprint that does not belong
Will you watch over them as they sleep,
  replaying all the late night conversations you had
All the plans you made to see the world,
  to try new things together
While you lay there will you reminisce
   on all the nights you spent whispering
sweet nothings against them, making them moan your name
Your desire for them petrifies you
The yearning to touch them
Yet you rise and leave
You disappear into the dark world
No words spoken.
She’ll be lovely. You’ll be able to count the spaces in between her ribs. She’ll have thin skin and it’ll be so easy to drive her crazy with just a single touch. It’ll be easy to make your mark on her, too. She’ll bruise easy and love it. She’ll think it’s beautiful.

2. She won’t ever be expensive on dates because all she’ll order is a salad. You’ll never have to worry about her ordering an expensive steak. You might have to worry about emergency room bills when she passes out, but she’ll never ask for anything else. All she’ll want is ***** and sleeping pills.

3. She will always put you first. Your needs always come before hers because she was raised “God first, others second, I am third”. She’ll make you hot chocolate and drive to your house at 3 AM with pizza she won’t eat, even though she’s dead tired and all she wants is a good night’s rest. You can count on her to be there.

4. She will tell you that you are perfect. She’ll believe it, too. Everyone around her seems to be perfect and she’s drowning under the weight of mediocrity but it’s ok as long as you know how perfect you are.

5. She’ll always have scissors and pencil sharpeners on hand. The knives in her kitchen are always sharpened to perfection and if you forget your razor at home, it’s ok. She has extras in her closet.

6. She’ll ******* anytime you want. As long as you don’t look at her while she’s getting undressed, she’ll love you until she can’t breathe anymore. She’ll smile as you kiss her thighs because you’re the only one that makes her feel beautiful.

7. Date a girl who hates herself because she’ll love you.
Let me cry in the middle of the night
Help me scream at the face of the moon
Leave me be in my state of restlessness
Until I realize what I need to be

Let me not to the people that I do not know
Heave me out of relationships that I do not deserve
Let me be in my state of restlessness
Until I figure out what is wrong

Ignore the spaced daze inside my eyes
Do not give attention to the cries of my heart
Let yourself be free of your own intention
And let me be with my feeling of restlessness
The echos in my head
Are where my dreams lay
My nightmares are my reality
My shadows are no longer my enemies

I feel the evil crawling beside me
Waiting to chain me to the walls
I need salvation
But this is what I'm use to

The on-going chants
Whispering it's going to be alright
Resisting never gets anywhere
Is this how I'm meant to be

To be enslaved to the mind
my imagination running wild
 Feb 2015 Aparajhitha Sudarsan
B
This boy asked me
why I flinch
every time he tries
touching me
and I told him that
he doesn't understand
the pain of
being licked by
your flames
and the burns
you left behind*



B.S.
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