Four AM
And five stitches later
I finally realized the
cold hard truth.
I never want
to see you again.
I can't keep showing
up at the hospital
when you've broken
me yet again.

My mother, my father, my friend
The one I truly love until the end
First month first day gave the way
To the sweetest mother
A gifted spirit like no other
Five sisters & thee only brother
All her children love her
Very humble, caring, and preparing
Us for a righteous life
Don't result in vengeance
Instead pray for assistance
Leave it in the Lords hands
Understand impossible
For him it's possible
I love her to the fullest
Gave birth to the illest
She came from Mexico
To give birth to a ****
It's not her fault I'm so crazy
Did her best to raise me
Jalisco from my mother
Tijuana from my father
Aztec blood runs in my veins
My indigenous reigns
I love her teachings,
Her speeches, & upbringings
I love her & no ones above her
A blessing I'm confessing
She did her best
It's up to me to finish the rest
Happy birthday Mi AMA
Ramona te amo
Con toda el alma

I took me 365 days to finally think im going some were
and know im back to the start trying to find my way back to you all over again
I will come back I promises
I will forgive you every time
I will date other guys wishing they were you
but I will tell everyone I hate you so they don't realise im still in love with you

They sit on the hood of the car
The guy wearing a hoody
The girl a long sleeved shirt
Her hands curling at the end if the sleeves exposing only her fingers
His hands are in his laps playing around
He is afraid that she might not think he is enough
Despite years and a loving relationship he still fears that his inadequacy will destroy his happiness
She fears that he'll leave her because she isn't beautiful enough
She thinks that his eyes will open one day and he'll leave
He extends his arm and puts it around her shoulders
In a seamless motion
That suggests it's an action that has been done a million times
She rests her head on his shoulder and he turns his head and kisses her head
It's a moment of pure beauty
And in that moment he knows that to her he will always be enough
And she knows he only sees her
It is in all respects
The perfect moment*

The hole in my chest that was filled by the dream is gaping. Darker than usual.  And the monster lunges out and sinks his ice cold talons deep into my heart. Wrenching my heart out of place it plunges my heart into the depths of it's lifeless abyss. And tears it asunder.

A boy wakes up in tears. Some unknown pain tearing so deep into his soul that he cries to the heavens in the pitiful hope that someone... anyone...anything will save him....

But
nothing does....
nobody does...

Let me put it this way
If our life is a constant swim in deep waters
We would need to swim long and far
We face our fears and pains in the forms of monsters trying to pull us under
We face life as the water trying to drown us
We face things in such a fatalistic manner
Let's cheer up
Let's make sure that if there is a newbie swimming next to us that looks at us
Let's make sure that that newbie can and will see how to swim
And swim we shall
We shall swim and kick the monsters in their ugly faces
And rise above life's efforts to drown us and we will soar
Oh how we will soar. We shall soar the skies and the water will never again hurt us.


We will soar