I tried to depend on you
Feel more than I could
Now all I have left
Is what I used to be

Drained of color
Void of life
Emptied of water and sun
A flower cannot grow freely

I heard you sing
I saw you dance
I knew about your beauty
When I saw you with my eyes
Your eyes told me I had a chance

I am afraid of death without fulfillment
But I fear the coldness in the tomb
Demons gnawing at my self-esteem

Yet, suicide is such a sad end too
It takes away happiness and love
From someone who has never felt the two

Leaving an corpse with a double death

There's no life in her eyes
There's no warmth in her heart
I'd said to myself that she was kind
When the veil fell I saw Death waiting
No love, only secrets to immortality

While shackled forever
In a circle of fire- without sight
What did strike me as beautiful was
The time I spent dying in her arms
No love, no more secrets this time

Serious poems are tough to read
I like poets who can express themselves
Through realism and simple words
Ironic...

Write as if your life depends on it
It will make for a comfortable death
Knowing you said everything you ever wanted

The rain brings back clear memories in clear waters
Or in the form of massive storms that power through
Sometime when the rain's gone and we need no shelter
I'd be with you

There's too much rain now and grey clouds
I keep reminiscing the words spoken and the silent vow
There won't be a tomorrow and a sun on the horizon
But there will be hearts broken and the sun will come out

That's the truth

The darkness follows me
As I chase the sunlight
Shadows fall faster than
The tears

I am yearning love I deserve
I can't be with you
Let your warm touch
Reassure me

I'm sitting on this park bench meant for two
It's the eve of my birthday right after the end of monsoon
The rain falls weakly with a heaviness in each drop
I miss the times when the thunder drowned out the crowd

I still hear them, the whispers of the past in friends lost
Through poetry, I can give a voice to my sensations
I'm able to temper my restless heart
But I promised to keep you safe when you were little

Life is transient with insecurities deeply entrenched
While all my friends like the seasons have been brief
Still I circle this park bench, I see a different youth
Who was changed because of you

I've been unfair to you, my fire
In the midst of my storm of lies
I have hid the truth from many eyes
That you are the best thing in my life

The wisest friend that God could give
To a fool
Whatever comes, I'll never
Forget you, my shine on the greyest days

It is the wind that guides birds through broken landscapes
Who are yet to find flight as they emerge chronically injured
Fire follows the fiery trail of what comes in its way
Of things that catch it or it assails, none come out the same

Nature's purpose is to give birth, but it also destroys
To grant worth to a weary traveler, it seeks a will to match the destination
To instill love in a thirsty soul, it catalyzes a deep-seated compassion
It also creates magic for the mystics who are of this earth with loftier ambitions

About which neither science nor math can enlighten us
It is an active pursuit of truth and self-defeating journey that is needed
Nature poses questions not as a test nor as a race, but as constant assessment
The result (good or bad) can come through authentic experience

Nature ushers me into a new order, perhaps I might flourish here
I have read the works of the greats trying to come closer to the outcome
Yet daily life is like a disturbed wind that has guided this ravenous bird
This mind cannot enter deep rest until the fire consumes the wealth of the earth

Ambition and greed are of this dry soil
From which grows the envy of others
It is hard, yet you have a choice
And the flower can be love, but you will have to toil

There were the stars in your embrace
The moon in your face
The fire in your eyes felt like
Some distant galaxy longed to be closer
To me through time and space

Shadows wash the moon hastily
As the waves wash the sandy beach
But not as lazily as the sea
Time is of the essence
I hope we can meet soon

Warmth doesn't lie there
It is the fire in his eyes that comforts
The core even in a world so broken

His piercing glare
Might turn away the lost traveler
But if you look long enough
He does kind of give a ****

She is not afraid of looking
She didn't see past the cold shell

Miscommunication is a bigger
Cause for broken friendships
Than malice

The simplest words
Make the best explanations
And the toughest paths
Lead to surreal destinations

While good things comes when you wait
Life rewards the greats
Seizing the fire, defying logic
It is a numbers game, you helped me hear the music

Toasted nuts, marshmallows roasted and half-eaten
Half-smoked cigarettes, edges of burnt letters
All notions romantic are consumed by fire
The embers of a fireplace have enveloped it

Yet, the sweetness of your lips
Alerts my innermost desires
Every time- like sunsets in a solitary sky
Your light luminesces the cold caves of time

In the eye of the storm, the waves ****** me aside
I simply trust nature and lose track of time
Holding my hands, praying for a fire in the distance
Or does my fire come from within?

Yet, a sudden chill comes up my spine
A hollow voice from my cowering throat signifies
The promises of a towering Captain Abe
Is it my place to lead the way?

Soon the sea will ring the knell on us all
I hold my breath and savor the deep blue
Will it hail whilst I sleep with the crew?
Tis' not a night of doubt, but to survive till dawn

The night is cruel and clouds are breaking today
In the breeze, the trees are love-stricken and astray
Rustling softly are the leaves that I share in my memory
Till I get my tea every morning after your coffee

You tell me the wind is heading south
I'm living in the north covering the gap in quick bounds

You said we'll never get a new start in this losing battle
As long as I keep shying away from the horrors of war
The dawn arrives quick and we've already quarreled
Just like a sign on the highway, we've ignored them all

I can't rid myself of last night's toil, the words, and blood we drew
The sickness stays in my flesh and blood, your sinew

Love is like dust in my hands
It falls through my frail fingers
I am hanging on, the feeling lingers
As I pick and grab at every grain of sand

I know what I'll name this song
It will shoot stars in your stomach
The music of the verses will make you long
For a word that is no more or less for the ******

This is a song for you but not me
It will be clear that my pain is an ache
The river of gold in these lines will run free
You can share this disease

It's a song that means so much to me
You'll just fake a laugh and clear the air
I like a fool will read into every gesture
That's my nature

Its Monsoon's *** end
It shed its tears on the bare leaves
The rain arrived and soon left
So fast, it swept me off my feet

I share this scene of the last shower
On a park bench, with the people here
The mud is filled with fallen flowers
Ravens will sit on trees, sky-bound till next year

The Indian cork trees hide behind hedges
Collecting its last drops greedily in each flower
While puddles form memories in the dead trenches
Rain comes and goes, leaving only petrichor

Winter will wrap up Monsoon's graceful stay
The swaying trees will bid farewell to a weeping friend
The pounding on my rooftop will quickly fade
I'll only desire for its return in the end

This isolated corner under the trees
Which is meant for strangers
From all walks of life
I've been here, collecting the leaves

Usually, I watch from the window
Today, it's raining
On a tree, a bird is singing
The rain stops to let it ring in the fields

This bird has flown
As it flutters miles, miles into the sun
Touching the skies and tip-toeing in clouds
Like hands outstretched into freedom

After every dark night
My mind is imprisoned
By its cold gates
Until I run to the fields and watch the birds

You told me to wait
I was sure I cared
It's been hours, I still do
About the shape of you

I gave you my world and let you in
You're one of the few
Whom I can count on
To see it through

I wonder where the time went
You hesitated in the end
Before opening your mouth
I finished the sentence

We were young
We had books and years in common
Or I thought it must have been fate
Or the way your hair sat

We once shared the same songs
If I'd focus, I could hear what you hear
All I needed was to let my heart act as a sail
You made me let go of fear

My faith has gotten stronger
The storm has turned into a nervous song
A song of the rain has morphed into a shelter of the mind
This power can right the wrongs in my life

But this planet will die, and so will the vile
So I talk all night about something pure
You will see that I have a life
I can't lie to you, you know I'm broken and poor

You have created a hole in my heart
There is a hunger that aches for your art
But I have waited too long to not start
I joke to everyone that she's **** smart

The wind changes speeds and the cities fall asleep
I could go oceans deep and search for that storm
But my power signals that this calmness runs deep
Let this moment of silence stay between us

The sun shines brightly
Buds, bees, and carefree breeze
Leaves feed off the heat

When the waters of life are choppy
God saved you from the storm
When times are smooth sailing
God gave you friends

The cloud breaks a little with a soft thud
A shower is anticipated, but the sun shines though
An effervescence flows through the river
As every bead of rain stirs the mammoth

A ice sheet piled on another melds into one
The vapors of meet the wide ether
Now the sun has turned crimson
A blizzard forms the weather

A touch of sun, a hope of a flower
Is enough to change everything
From a wintry, desolate stretch
To a island with hot, temperate hedges

The sun makes me squint my eye
There are times I don't wanna see the light
The cold makes me clutch my arms
You've held my eyes in your cold gaze

We could walk over the streets in the rain
The steps look like a painting of *******
Colorful but bleak, full of pain
The glaze of the puddles shine on the night

The dandelions in the field make me sniffle
There are times I don't wanna see the light
The cold makes me clutch my arms
You've held my eyes in cold gaze

In every waking moment, I seek the wretched past
Sleeping and dreaming seem to be a blur
I want an escape from the chaos of my mind
But let me tell you a rhyme nonetheless

The shadows of the incoming evening cool the forest
Like lights glinting through the trees in Ranthambore
Hunters with their rifles and bruises
Have the tiger in their sights, I am silenced with the muzzle

Like the blind, we tracked our way
I am free knowing this day
We followed the jackals and nilgai, out we went
I am veering at every shot, alive, as the raven quiver

Now my lips are shaking and trembling
My heart rushes with its warmth slowly ebbing away
It pumps dreams into my bloodstream, raising itself
Until I am shattered, scrounging for the illusory past

I am filled with regret, maybe I am unable to express
If you read this through and through
You know the power of hunger and desperation
Let's just say I played the cards just like you

I am grateful that I took it easy on myself
Life and sleep seem to be a blur
In a land where the people are blind
I am glad I can see now, where I went wrong

My mind has closed in itself
I know I will miss my Ranthambore
My childhood will miss the search
I will miss it all but I am glad I lived through it all

Civilization is born
In an instant
And lost forever
It does resurface often; don't count on it

The traces of logical development
All lost to the constant brisk stride of progress
The pace of everyday with broken sidewalks that line the streets
All missing from the newspapers I once read; my eyes have bled

The people who once existed become memoirs
Those memoirs with celebrities, now memories
All have been cast away and exiled
Only to come and meet us at our destiny

Children whom you loved to play with
The game has changed, my friends
One must start again
To make it into the books of history

Your whispers will echo through the thundered seas
Memories will tear the sails from the canvas seams
A soldered heart that was once a levee
Now broken and flooded

Our love is a rocky shore where sailors dare to dream
Ships of words are wrecked by bombs under covers of the night
We see the sight of hope but hope is not our guide
It is a distant dream after the thunder dies

Then the journey comes alive

Hello my lover from spring
It was last June I spoke with you
I still go through those poems too
It has been forever since I changed the tulips, roses, and anemone

The flowers remind me of your ruby lips and their sweet taste
My Indie has quickly learned to sit and drop for a quick treat
But the thought of you lingers and stays
I promise to be with you soon in February

Hello my lover from this summer
I let go of the past because it is heavy
An ocean of worry no longer holds me back
I am taking the path of least resistance

You remind me of my mother
She has grown old and worn out her clothes
The effect you have had on me is profound
My writing because of you has turned youthful

The lover before you was cold as winter
Worlds apart we were but we tried
So these letters are an attempt to accept her
The reasons I have to love you outweigh my reluctance

The moon is beautiful and the skies are glimmering sadly
The stars are scintillating and our eyes are blinded by them
We don't see the sickness of obsession
Only the goodness of perseverance persists
The oceans are clearing view, clearing the foggy sight, for the ships
The mermaids have stopped breathing out the mist
Our love is no longer felt in sighs but in letters and trinkets

The point was made
But, the feeling of doubt
Seemed to linger

A friend of mine calls
In the stormy night
She cries on the phone
Says she wants a lover

She's afraid of being on the run
She says she can't be on her own
She needs someone to hold her close
I can't let her go

She lets me be her only recluse
Soon she will have to choose
It will tear us apart from inside
We'll share hearts that have died

We will be singles on this night

I know she's scared and doesn't trust
I know she thinks that I can change
But, I can't change the way I feel
I see just the two of us

It's tense, I tell myself quickly
I'll tell you, no matter how you tell it
There's no way to run from the truth
She knows it too

We're like two parallel lines
Never bound to meet
Except when we look back in time
They seem to fall into line

We will both be singles on this night

I seek comfort
In my regular life
From memories so alive

Cynicism and idealism are two sides of the same coin; this pattern appears in young idealists. The intellectuals are cursed by knowledge. They use the privilege of education to question the government. Full of vigor and all for change. But, doing little to bring it.

I strode into a bar one night
Stumbled actually into the dim light
At the sight of a lady
With a stellar gown made of dark fabric
With her hair so brown, it could have been fawn
I don't remember the details now
I don't even wear that cambric tunic
The night had slowly faded into a hushed dawn
With the drinks and chaotic murmurs turning to yawn
Like sunshine on flowers through a canopy
Our eyes met instantly
As the bar emptied
We got along well, I thought too myself
Under the stars and constellations, we spoke
Churning stories under the starlight, gaily
Of things which to this day have passed
Five years had passed
The serendipity struck me blind
"I am not capable of love."
"You aren't. But you will be."
She had the raw optimism of a child

I was still playing with my life
Under the serenity of the night sky
I realized a lot
In that short time
I was sure of someone
For once in my life

Then, I looked around the bar
She was still twiddling her thumbs
My heart beat twice as I looked at the shore
I wanted to say something
Looking through the window pane
The boats were docked, rocking on the waves
They were nestled near the pier on the high tide
This conversation was sailing smoothly
I needed a plan!
I had a plan
At least, I thought I had a plan
Yet I was tied to a feeling, there was some stillness
It smelled like beer, but, I could taste the fear
I couldn't ask her out
Or could I?

I decided to walk out of the tavern that night
I admit, I was a little lost and alone
Best choice I had made in a long time, right?
Suddenly, the door flew open
She ran up to me
The air was clear, her face lit up in the dead dark
I said a whole sentence, but, the wild wind hid the stupid remark
She blurted out, "I have never felt so alive."
I wish we meet again
Because I need that raw optimism again
Now I think too much, feeling too little

Wounds heal
Memory fails
Scars never fade

Spring brings forth life by the hour
Bees flap their little wings
In violent search for a various flowers
In my loneliness, I am waiting

Like a bud restless to change
As the sun laves my petals where the dew stays
And alerted by the sudden rain after a long summer
I am waiting for the touch of clear water

I am eager to witness the winter
In all its splendor, I might shrivel and die
Or luckily I might escape with a perpetual shiver
I wish to spread my wings despite the ravages of time

I am waiting for spring to blossom
I want my spring now

When the Lord closes
A door, he opens a window
So, that you can jump out of it