I've been obsessed with her.
She's been obsessed with him.
It's the age old predicament,
Heard time and time again.

And it certainly could be worse,
Of that I am quite sure.
But it feels downright abysmal
To be number two for her.

I've written a good bit about it
She's written even more.
She's written her heart and soul out,
She's let her feelings pour.

Hers did to her what mine did to me
Her heart for him kept calling.
I thought she'd be there to catch me
But she herself was falling.

They pepper him with questions.
They scoff at his answers.
He hasn't practiced this argument.
He doesn't know what he's talking about.
They can fix him.
What does he know?
He's just some naïve teenage punk.
Maybe he wasn't raised right.
Maybe his parents didn't teach him.
They can fix him.
They'll take him to church; that'll do it.
They'll read him scripture; that'll do it.
He's feeble. He just hasn't been shown the way.
All he needs is to be taught.
They can fix him.
But he can't be taught.
He isn't cooperating.
He's not taking them seriously.
Something must be wrong with him.
Surely it's his parents.
Or maybe it's those TV scientists.
Or maybe... it's them.
No, it couldn't be.
They've been nothing but supportive.
They've tried to help him.
All they wanted was for him to be happy.
But all that he needed to be happy was to be left alone.

For months you kept me,
Hanging on your every word.
Waiting for a real reason to stay.
Hoping for you to save me.

And then you said the words.
Not the ones I wanted to hear.
The ones I needed to hear.
The words that let me go.

They made me free.
I stopped chasing.
I moved on from you.
At least, that's what I tell myself.

At the beginning, you warned me,
That I was going to get hurt.
You told me you couldn't help yourself,
That you couldn't control it.

Initially, I thought I was fine.
I thought I could take whatever you threw at me,
How bad could it be?
What was the worst that you could do?

First were minor things,
Things that built my confidence,
Made me feel invincible,
They didn't affect me.

Then there was the first major incident.
You needed space.
I said I was fine, and for the first few days I was.
You came back just in time.

But now here we are.
It's been a month and the hurting is here.
I knew I'd miss you,
I didn't know it'd be this bad.

I can't be without you.
I crave your company,
I long for your touch,
I miss your scent.

You took what was once a strong man,
reduced him to a weak fool.
I thought I could handle you.
But no one is truly invincible.

I miss you.
That part's pretty obvious.
But there's more to it.
I miss stuff that didn't even happen.
I want to hold you like I never held you.
I want to kiss you.
I want to meet your parents.
I want to do everything.
But I can't.
Because you're gone, and she's here.
I said she was gone, but she's still here.
She's been waiting.
She doesn't know it, but she's here.
She can't take your place, but she's getting close and I can't stop her.
I don't want to.
I want to have a chance with someone.
I want 2 months to be pebbles.
I want to have something worth having.
But I'd never let it be about what I wanted.
Because I'm durable.
I can take whatever you throw at me.
I'm more durable than John Legend when I'm on a bad day.
All of me loves all of you.
And when he "Used to love U" I still do.
I can hit a curve and your edges are so sharp, a cut would be a compliment.
And maybe I should rob somebody.
Hell, I would if you told me to.
But for now, I'll just stay on the end of this rope,  waiting.
So here's where you get to decide.
Pull me up so I can be with you, or cut the cord and let me fall.
Don't worry, I've got a parachute, and she's waiting for me at the bottom.

I offer you a challenge:
I'll give you everything I can,
Gifts, Love, Time, anything,
as long as you don't take advantage of me.

I'll tell you how I feel,
how you're the only one,
how you're the most beautiful,
as long as you stay humble.

I'll go out of my way to see you,
to keep you happy,
to help you succeed,
as long as you don't rely on me.

I'll be everything you need,
as long as you don't expect me to be.

Alone:
without anyone or anything else, separated, isolated.

Lonely:
feeling an emotional response to lack of companionship.

They tell me I look lonely.
I tell them I'm not.
They point out the fact that I'm sitting in a corner with a 5-yard radius of open floor.
"Yes," I say, "Isn't it lovely?"
They tell me I can't be happy when I'm alone.
I ask if they'd like to place a wager on that statement.
Confused, they walk away.
Now I'm alone.
Now I'm happy.