He loves me, he loves me not
he don't love me, though he ought
but I don't believe that I deserve
and so I know i've lost the nerve
when you don't think that you are right
you've already lost that fight
though love, it really isn't war
we treat it as such, more and more
love exists in mind, not heart
and that is why we're still apart
If I could make my mind believe
then your love, I would receive

I want you so much I can't breathe
she runs and hides from his desire
chasing after her love true
who chases after yet another
She is running after love
he skips and dances from her arms
falling on the lips of a beauty
too exotic and wild to be tamed
running along with all the males
as they chase this maiden fair
she skips and laughs at their attention
seriousness coming over her as she sites him
the one she loves just up ahead, who runs alone
she follows at his heals awhile, watching waiting
time to pounce, and as she does, another girl
from out of nowhere and off he goes
round and round they chase and chase
never catching what they want
trying to fill that empty place
till finally, two, run side by side
they may still look away sometimes
at long last, they realize that the other is still there
it's time to stay, the hunt is done the race is...won?
yes for some.

So many! Covering the entire expanse, barely space between
little dots of hope, wishes afar, glittering and answering
some bright with promise, a heart of faith, believing
some dim, doubtful, but still glimmering, shyly
scattered designs, untold, mysterious and majestic
love, spelled out above in angelic linguistics
a rushing sound nearby, not anxious as with humans
desiring nothing, hurrying nowhere, just pressing on
languid, endless, steadiness of a river, speaking perseverance.
a melody of croaking, rustling, and high pitched "singing"
peering into blackest forest, heart pounding, hands shaking
enveloped in the earth's night symphony of excitement
a troubled soul, laying in the deserted road, seeking
the songs of love, the vast power...at last, takes heart.

One day of heartbreak deepest dark
breath upon my neck, cold and stark
tears fell down like icy rain
and I cried out to you, not in vain
sobs so harsh they scraped my throat
walls up so high like a fiery moat
into my life no one could break
I was afraid they'd only take
take my friendship and use me
take my heart and abuse me
prison of my own making
human contact forsaking
I looked up and prayed to You
and my prayers, they were not few
dried up like a desert from all the tears
and I couldn't fight off all my fears
but You picked me up right off the dock
You are my God my shelter my rock
On the worst day I ever faced
I felt your love as You embraced
I felt the joy and it was mine
through me I could feel You shine
I can't explain just what it was
It's never happened but because
I went through these darkest times
You gave me the urge to write these rhymes
To help some broken hearted soul
and tell them that You are the goal
If you want to feel fearless and free
then I hope that you will listen to me
He can shine His POWER through you
and then you'll be the best of YOU

It simmers inside like a *** set to boil, this roiling bubbling never ending restlessness. Like a rabbit in the forest, seeming content for a time, yet never letting down the guard. Always alert, always watching, always ready to run. Fight or flight a way of life, there is no life without this strife. Content to be and sit and relax, claw my eyes out like angry cats. Punching holes in walls with fists, and screaming into pillow fits. Drinking drowning all it out, for false release and sultry pout. Use them up and toss them out, not what you were talking about. You knew you needed something there, to make this life seem somewhat fair. Nothing going right at all, this anger eating feed it’s call. growing green monstrosity threatening lives all around me with negativity. Bringing darkness to the light the shadowed soul of fight or flight. The angry red and growing pain is searing every dried up vein. Till nothing left but this monster, blinded slave to all it’s incurred. Anger never served it's master, turns the tables shackles of disaster, and satisfaction never gained by feeding what it thirsts in vain this rain of destruction all around never makes a life abound. The monster growing stronger still will hunger more and never filled and feed it though you might and try it will never ends until you die.

Unless you take a sword of light and fight it with nobility and tell it truth and peace and love and right it with humility. It can be beat, it can be killed, it does not have to win. Surrender anger to the Lord, and turn back from your sin.

I traveled down a winding road not sure where to go
I let the wind just push me around landing here or there
Sometimes a path would seem alight with a certain glow
but when I followed them they didn't lead me anywhere

a dead end here a dead end there, sometimes its so frustrating
so I got back on the winding road and I went on my way
and then it straightened out a bit which was so exciting
there was a road alongside mine and it felt like a new day

the fog had finally lifted and the dead ends were no more
all those winding paths that crossed, nowhere to be seen
I felt a clarity and light, I could feel it to my core
the foggy gray path I'd traveled now full of life and green

this path that followed next to mine, was straight and clear
it veered when mine veered, and it curved with mine
I started to worry that it would leave and gave in to my fear
that is when I saw it, bright yellow and foreboding sign

"Rocks Ahead!" It said, trying to warn me of my danger
and then I saw the path was no longer clear before me
a giant boulder stood ahead making our two paths a stranger
but as roads continue on, that is not the end of the story

a tunnel here and tons of rocks, the sign did not justify
the difficult path these roads did take before they met again
mine went through a tunnel, dark and heavy but I can testify
I don't know how dark the other road got but it was not the end

these roads still run at parallels and see each other once in a while
in beautiful green meadows and dangerous cliffs that are not tame
and traveling along it has made me cry, and scream and smile
but I know the roads will someday merge and they will be the same