Heard her heart through the screen
And all the tabloids deemed
Worth enough to smear beneath her name.
Headlined and underlined,
Saw that sadness in her eyes
Long before it wore away her smile

Grace is freely gifted
To those good enough to find her
And though they tried their hardest
I fear they never spied her.

The burn, icy in the throat
Flaring up constellations as it goes,
Spitting up supernovas that blast in puffs
of grey air and curl into the ether,
like an afterthought.
Tongue tied, lightly listless in the snow
Glowing white with the wonder
Of nothingness in the mind.
Denied the deafness,
Dreary doubts and thoughts of morning, where sunlit and blinded fumbling take hold,
Knowing devolves, unknown.

Synapses sizzle like taut guitar strings,
Plucked with the pining of the in-between,
The nameless dimension
Where everything is and isn't.
No, box.
No cat.
Schrodinger, doffs, tips cap and theory
To the bountiful bleakness of being.
Explanations die,
Shoot stars behind the redness and the glassy-eyed smile.
Words fail, burnt up frozen
And flailing in their mediocrity.
Silence spins, giggles fill its spaces
And gravity grounds the freedom.

Honestly, I was paralysed
Quick breathed, chest choking kind
That numbs to the tips of fingers
And the bottom of the heart,
Feet spread wide apart as if I ever stood a chance of taking the blow.
Its stings,
bleary eyed I'm blinking and rubbing at the skin, massage the redness away;
All that nasty shame and the ridiculous burn of guilt
That has me wilting round my shadow.
I think I might have seen something,
Hints bleeding into the beauty of blissfull ignorance and dulling the gleam,
Blinkers just a little skew-wiff
To let the light in and shine on your bare ***
Going to town between someone else's legs.
You dont look half as nice now,
Your flesh is pale and hair curls darkly
And its gross, like those meaty moans
That make you sound like a boar.
I can't call her a *****, not really,
But shes enjoying herself with the lie of one
Screaming obscenities to God
As if hed take time out of his
Busy schedule to fulfil her voyeristic fantasies,
Deity bowing his head to watch
You smash into her and smash us to pieces.
You're shuddering and shes faking those screams
There"s no glee in her eyes, just the simpering emptiness of making you feel like a man.
But your not, you're a coward
Who's **** is fond of flattery,
chases it like a puppy, perking up hopefully to be petted.
I dont think I'm upset anymore.
I'm out the door and rain falls cool on the ground
I'm crunching down the gravel,
shedding my committment,
It's has a satisfying sound that dies
Beaneath my boot as you stumble after me.
'It's not what you think'
It's funny because I honestly
Hadn't thought anything except
I'd never never seem you like that before;
Not so raw and pasty
And ugly.
Maybe you'll meander back into my mind
As divine as you have been before
But right now I deplore the memory.
I dont love you
Because I dont know who you are.

She could blow away,
Burnt to blurry ashen pieces
Of limbs cindered to smoke,
Bespoke pain for a
Place of her own making.

She could sink behind the skyline,
Bleeding death to
A time when she was solid,
And she and the sky
Were definitively separate.
That time when she could cry
And clouds could rain.

But now their tears fall the same
And she is blown away.

I love those lines that whisper happiness
That speak of dimpled cheeks
And all the time you've passed
Loving and laughing
With me.

Night weep the weary
words that he said
quietly to her heart
as she slept

Had me, held me in verse,
hynonotized me with the lines
he mumbled into the shell of my ear.
Rainbows laced in the vibrations
that quivered, shook within me
As I shivered and he smiled.

They were wild green,
thick foliage of possibilities,
mild mossy tone, that was young and old,
Untold and untamed.

They were gold,
Honeyed, syruped on my skin,
with lashings of sweetness
That sparkled like sugar
On my senses.

They were red
ripe and passionate,
hanging low
ready for my want
to pluck them from the air,
carry them close,
***** pressed, heart racing and tempted
to all that he offered.

They were were white,
Light on the air like whisps of smoke,
quietly sneaking and closing the door, disintegrating into distorted colours
Whose sound I strained to hear,
in the silence.