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Rachelhopeful Nov 2019
I AM all that is
and all that was
And all that will ever be.

I am the sun
The stars
Moon
And sea

I am infinity
I am infinite wisdom
All knowing
And free

I am love
Love is me
I am you
And you are me

I am we
and uniquely me

I am a mother,
Brother,
Sister
And child
Born to be free

I am your child
I am the seed

I am the present
The past
the future
Of all that will be
I am light
The infinite source
Within
all beings

If I am you and you are me
Why can’t we coexist peacefully?
Belief that all beings are connected
Rachelhopeful Nov 2019
FEAR
My fear of you
manifested and grew
I didn’t break down
I broke through
I didn’t retaliate
And spite you
I just spoke the truth
How could I be blind
To abuse?
It was a familiarity
I grew accustomed to
Blind to my own life of abuse but now awakened
Rachelhopeful Nov 2019
I left you.
You didn’t love me
You loved that I made you
look like a big man
The narcissistic image
Rachelhopeful Nov 2019
I tried to love you
But couldn’t anymore
Because Loving you
Meant hating myself.
Learning to love myself
Learning self love after a lifetime of narcissistic abuse
Rachelhopeful Nov 2019
Who are you
Two faces
But true to none
The narcissist doesn’t even know who they are
Rachelhopeful Nov 2019
DONE
I grieved the relationship
we never were
Because you only love yourself
When I finally left
My grieving for
Us was done.
Rachelhopeful Mar 2018
THE NARCISSISTIC CYCLE

I got your game,
I know your name.
Your the covert Narcissist
Who likes to shame.
Your game to blame,
And make others feel pain.
To feed your sick and twisted brain.
Your always right
And there is no use for me to fight.
Your not capable of love
You think your above.
But you lost me
And now you can never
Control me.
That must torture you so...
I hurt your ego when I told you to go.
Now your devil horns
are starting to grow and show.
You hurt my innocent friend
And even your own children.
You come after me rage-full.
I never wanted to expose  
Your deep secret
That you dress as a woman
Who calls herself “Angel”.

He’s just like my narcissistic mother,
With her twisted words
She killed my brother.
By filing his sweet mind
With a lifetime of doubt
He saw no other way out.
Now she blames me
With her verbal assault
Certainly it’s not her fault.

My brother’s spirit lives inside
And gives me strength to survive.

I clearly see the
Narcissistic cycle of my life.
My mean mother always
called me a *****
And created imagined strife.
Now she’s turned on my daughter.
Abuse me,
But hurt my daughter and
You’ve hit my boundary.
I do not believe
Her lies and predictions.
It’s Mommy Dearest
With the pathological condition.

How could I be so blind?
That I didn’t realize
the man
I trusted to father my children
Is the most evil devil.
He is so dangerous
And scares me so
He’s out of the home
But last week tried to
run me off the road
I hate myself for being
Stupid, needy and kind
I cry and cry
Because I was blind
twisted my words,
My thoughts
His harem of family and friends
He’s convinced
That I’m the crazy one
To no end.
I struggle every day
Because he will not go away.
Written at this point of my life when I finally realized my patterns of codependency since childhood narcissistic abuse.  Feeling foolishly manipulated.

— The End —