Preserver
Keeper
Guardian of memories
That’s what poets are
Their words dance like a candle flame’s shadows against the soft blow of the wind
Flickering, whispering
In the silence of the night
Humming a lullaby.
Their words the tune that tell
A story.
A memory.
Of what once was, of what is,
And of what will be.

There is a conversation in our silence that I want to immortalize.

She's hiding again
Behind her books
Behind her unspoken thoughts
Behind the world she created inside her head
Behind her poetry.

You see
She has the tendency to disappear
But it doesn’t necessarily mean
That she doesn’t want to be found
She just wants to be seen
Not for the surface she created to please
But for the beautiful and raging storm within.

I fought hard for far too long
Taking it all, the pain
I thought I was just being strong
When I kept standing in the rain.

Looking around but not knowing
Who I'm looking for in this blurry haze
Maybe, just maybe, I'll be okay
I'll find my way out of your maze.

They told me
"Some things are broken
Beyond repair."
I heard them, I listened.
But then they forced me
To take
A bitter pill called Change.
And so I thought,
Perhaps,
Some broken things
Are not meant to be repaired
But accepted.

It was a hot summer day
But felt like a cold night in winter
I see your figure receding away
In the plain 'til you reached the horizon.

This is the vanishing point
The part where I'm supposed to say goodbye
It's not just that I can't but I won't
And perhaps you know the reason why.

My hands reach out to you
But my feet is stuck on the ground
I'll be right here til you come back
Whether the sun chooses to stay or the rain comes around.

The rain did come after all
And I'm still standing on the same ground
My feet, bare and wounded and sore
From struggling to walk towards the horizon.

I willed myself to stay
Standing on the ground filled with nails
Ironic that the unseen can cause so much pain
While it's easier to bear the physical one.

I am but a parched being
Who can't be quenched by rain
And I can walk right into the oasis
But I chose to bear the pain.

It was a scorching hot summer day,
Til the cold night in winter.
I knew it was time to walk away
When someone handed me a sweater.

I punish myself everyday by remembering you.

I forgot
How the pen felt
Underneath my fingers.

You see me
And you judge
But you never see through.
You see me
And you hate
That’s because you choose to.

My thoughts are loud once again
It screams through the depths of my being
Warring emotions deep within me
I thought being alone is comforting.
Still, this is better than having many people surround me
I'd rather be held captive by my own thoughts
Than be drowned by the words of people around me.
It's a lonely thing
Yet also comforting
When you find something to do
To write poems
Inked by emotions
And touch a heart or two.

I seek to be remembered
but contented with not being forgotten.

Briefly the shadows met-
And understood each other.

I’m in love with the night
Its loneliness, the vulnerability
Hiding in plain sight
Like it wants to be seen
But fears unacceptance.

I’m in love with the moon
That ethereal glow, surrounded by stars
Like a speck of sparkling dust
A constant reminder
That the night can be beautiful too.

The night has the kind of light that the day does not have.

Even if your mind questions it,
Your heart already knows.

When the one thing you want
Is the only thing out of reach

“I miss you,”
is what I wanted to say.
But I don’t say it, anyway.