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Mash Oct 2017
:-(
I wish my illness was physical.
Maybe then I'd be more forgiving of myself.
I can't help but think of myself as weak for being brought down to my knees by my own mind.
And it would also mean I wouldn't have to deal with the occasional "Hey,but you look fine" or "just get over it".
Get over it how?
  Sep 2017 Mash
Bongiwe
I have a friend,
he utters no words,
he passes no judgements.
He is my companion through the darkest of nights,
and in my most joyous delights.
He's stable,
dependable,
even as the world retreats, often abhorred by the essence of me
he keeps his place,
he is pen and paper,
he is poetry.
Inspired by a poem , I just wish I remembered its name.
  Jul 2017 Mash
Bongiwe
See I have to ignore what you say,
because I'd never be happy if my happiness was tied to your opinion of me.
You don't think too highly of me ,do you?
The loudness of your voice when you speak,
You don't think me too bright,do you?
I finally realise that it's pointless trying to be the best of me,
you don't want me.
You fell in love with the idea of me,
an illusion of what I could be, an illusion of my own creation fabricated with long nails, perfect make up and clothes to match.
I hid my imperfections,
foolishly thinking you'd dig until you found my truth,
that you'd see beyond my mask and heal my scars,
but now that your love is gone,
it's clear to me that the only person I should learn to love is me.
Mash May 2017
Bright and vibrant friend of mine,I plead for mercy on your behalf.
From the sidelines I watch as within you,a thousand battles are fought and lost,your spirit low,almost broken,but everyday you rise above,you survive. How do you do it?
My heart is heavy,the feeling of helplessness almost consumes me
Because I swear,I want to be more than just a bystander to your pain.
How I wish I was strong enough to be your salvation.
I hate that I am weak,that I have no such power,that I have to stand aside,watch you brave the full current of the wave,and hope to God you don't drown-Bongiwe Ntsuntsha
This is something one of my closest friends ,Bongiwe,wrote when I finally opened up about  my depression.
  Feb 2017 Mash
yne
If we're not fated
to be in this life, then I'll
meet you in the next.
  Feb 2017 Mash
Cameron Scholes
Come lay with me,
You are a necessity,
I want to feel you,
While it is just us two.

I wish I could put into words,
The love I feel,
You don't give me butterflies,
You give me hummingbirds.
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