my muse
my unspoken words
our antithetical stories
your charm
your goodbye before the dawn

i traced the lines of our fate
never aligned
the red string woven around
which seems too weak
your presence lingers around me
like a shadow

rain poured down before
before we became alive
before i let it out
before i could hold on
before you screamed it out
i watched you being washed away from my shore

i watch the rain
blurring edges of my side of the world
as i wait for it to cleanse my wounds
as i wait for it to blur my memory
as i wait to let go

shipwrecked and i found myself
on an deserted island
not a place to call home
i made a raft to conclude this journey
to reach at your shore
“is it a good idea”, i asked myself

i’m floating alone on sea
seagulls carrying my letters
but couldn’t reach because of storm
storm coming from your side
storm that you sent
send me back to that island

i’m lost in the woods
with no one to guide me though
i had two options
but chose the one that led to you
a choice that i regret,
a reason why i can’t get you out of my head
still on this endless journey to your shore

i saw in the mirror, a reflection of mine
the wallflower that fade and shine
standing atop in the war against my fears
demolished the walls, became a people pleasure
made friends that spew out poison
nothing good came from letting pretenders into my life
took off that mask and enjoyed my own company
now I have someone, a true friend of mine

my world surrounded by gray clouds
a moment’s happiness is all i seek
my heart covered in magoa
a affectionate touch is all I need
i want his life
not jealous but rather envious
judged by the divine power
my latibule lies in his world

the last words of farewell
were sharper than a knife
the last words of farewell
damaged more than a cannon fight
all my fears conquered that war
leaving me to drift on the sea
with no sign of shore
thus began the night,
never to come to an end
crying in veil
and my pain reached new heights

how should i define?
define the idea of you?
my nerves are pranking me
to believe,
“it will be same as someone before you”
for once
i want to dream, i want to believe,
“your love will be grand as seas”
i leave this letter at your door
with a painting of you from my mind
you will never absquatulate me
your beaming smile will forever hide my crimes
the crime i define as- “loving a liar”
that unforgivable sin will bury in the past
and my idea of you will forever last

three years of hell
three years of pain
three years of desertion
three years of lying to myself
“that someday your ship will arrive
on my shore now covered in weeds”

you set out on the seas
to look for your stolen peace
your memories growing over me
prisoner to who I have become
my eyes are starting to feel blurry
death is creeping upon me