I found just now
The personality
I am the most in love with
A great relief for me
But the bad part is
It doesn't actually exist
It's only in fiction
Condescending yet
Fully understanding
Comically light, yet
No seriousness
No fear in speaking the mind
Dark past, bad visions
Terrible desires
But a good heart
Makes me want to die
And be reborn anew
In her presence
The next great novel
I'd **** for that,
She'll **** anyway

Human nature
Is to defend
And to love
Those to whom
We are close
Or have been
In the past

Animal nature
Is to scurry
Or to fight
Those who
They do not understand
Or have not
In history

I think about this
And get confused
That i seem
To be dealing
With animals
Rather than
Human beings

I look at the two moons in the east
Point to them with my index finger,
Thumb pointing up, like a gun, and say:
"Bang, bang."

I'm tired.
I'm tired of exams.
I'm tired of studying day and night for a piece of paper which literally determines my next job application.
That doesn't make any sense.
I could be **** good at something not a paper is worth for, but will i be given a chance to prove so?
I'm tired of exams
Aren't you?

It starts in your fingers.
They grow numb and then your throat tightens
and it feels like your vocal chords will snap if you don't scream
and your airways clog and you can't breathe
and your chest starts to hurt but you can't massage it
since your fingers are so numb
and the pain becomes so overwhelming that your brain dulls
and you can't think, all you can do is feel
and feel and feel
until you can't feel anything at all
and that is how you drown without being in water.