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  Oct 2023 Lenora
emnabee
The poet lives two lives.
One on the outside,
And one in their mind.

When you look in their eyes
You could see an abyss.

If you looked long enough
You could sink into it.

But most people don’t see it.

Take the time to read the words, though,
And you would know for sure.

The poet lives in two different worlds.
A little escape from the madness.
Or maybe, into.
  Oct 2023 Lenora
August
He gave me dead flowers
So I can smell them every day
The rotten petals falling
The color of decay

The washed out sunflower
The dehydrated leaves
The mold on the water
The color of debris

The richly red rose
Now drooping to the floor
The color of love
Existed no more

But still I saved the flowers
And smelled them every day
And watered them with tears
To let them grow again.
  Oct 2023 Lenora
Nat Lipstadt
Why Men Cry in the Bathroom

For so many reasons.
I will tell you the why.
I think you know,
Or perhaps, you think you know.

Men are always O.K.,
Even when not.

We expect the worse,
Accept the worse,
Nonetheless,
We are forever unprepared.

Wearily, we cry,
In the bathroom, in private,
Lest sighs slip by,
We be unmasked,
Early warring, strife signs warning.

Copious, tho we weep
Before the mirror confessor,
It is relief untethered,
Unbinding of the feet,
An uncounting
Of beaded rosaries,
Of freshly fallen hail stones,
Of night times terrors
By dawn's early edition's light,
and welcomed.

But look for the mute tear,
The eye-cornered drop,
*** tat, that never drops,
But never ceases formation and
Reforming, over and over again,
In a state of perpetuity of reconstitution,

The tippy tear of an iceberg revealing,
And I see you peeping, wondering,
What is beneath


Look for:
the torn worm-eaten edges of spirit,
thrift shop bought, extra worn,
grieving lines neath the eyes,
where the salt has evaporated,
discolored the skin.
worry lines,
under and above,
browed mapped, furrowed boundaries.
the laugh line saga,
where better days are stored,
recalled, as well as recanted,
publicly, privately.

Why just men?

I don't know,
Perhaps,
it is all I know.


Jan 6, 2013
your effusive and lengthy comments are each a poem in their own right.  

Tinkered with June 22, 2013
With a push from Bala,
A serial peeper, thank God!
Lenora Sep 2023
My doubts..
My flesh eating
All absorbing
Never defeated
Self consuming doubts
Lenora Sep 2023
Loading up countless ammunition for me

Full release

You think so low of me
Breaking me making me feel like I deserve it
But who deserves this
Does forgiveness hurt like this

Even in my wrongness
Does it truly hurt like this…
Lenora Sep 2023
At least this feeling comes with acceptance
Newness
No longer remaining in the safe zone of what I know
Of what is familiar
Stepping in the open
Knowing it could be a better way to explain my motion
It could be intertwined with a deeper devotion
Simply put it could be better
More pure
Not constricted by the bind of needing to rhyme
guided by my most honest being
As if each word is slowly freeing me
Lenora Sep 2023
A simple string that stretches for miles
Intertwined threads that if deciphered could break the masses
Pieces and pieces of me until I’ve unraveled into nothingness
Into meaningless
Quivers in my body as every cell inside me jumps
Begging to be released
Begging to be pulled through this simple string
In agony as they come together
Only to scatter and combust
Causing movement only justifiable to someone on the verge of break
The edge of collapse
How bad could the process be ?
I’m falling into myself on a daily basis
crumbling by each word I hear
Grasping on my skin prying my flesh as if the emotions could exit my pores
Heavy heaves as I grip the soft ends of my consciousness
Lusting after the feeling of when I was okay
swaying restlessly as if I completely lost myself in that moment
Feeling every emotion every thought as every word new word clashes between
My breath from long sighs to short pants as the stimulation cripples me
Curling into the ball that tricks me into believing I’ll be okay
While my internal filter malfunctions at each and every request
Lifting me up and slamming me down
As I attempt countless behaviors to make it bearable
Losing focus
On words on thoughts on the point
Staring at tv screens phone screens
Lost on the glow of LEDS
In a trance unrecognizable to the self
Losing track of time
Having no management no organization no boundaries
A leaf in Mother Natures enchanting wind
With no destination
As life Carries me
Struggling to connect
When I feel every motion so intensely
As if my own self is against me
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