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When we meet now... it's like you don't even know my name.
When we meet now... it's like we've been a joke to you.
When we meet now... it's more painful than going to work.
When we meet now... it's like I'm surrounded with smoke. It's hard to breathe.
When we meet now... it's like those kisses meant nothing to you.
When we meet now... it's like those hugs meant nothing to you.

Now, I don't know why?
Now, I can't go back.

Because, when we meet now... it's like those ten years meant nothing to you.

Ten years of a person's life is not something that can be easily replaced.
Did I seem desperate when I told you I loved you?

Did I?

Is that why you could play with my heart ?

And still make me keep thinking of you till this extent.

Did I seem pitiful to you?

Is that why you kept on asking me those questions?

And made me overthink every one of your actions?

Did I seem like a fool to you?

Is that why you played along with me so well?

And made me fall in deeper and deeper and deeper each and every day.

Did I seem so easy to you?

Is that why you don't want to get the heck out of my head... my heart?

And even in your absence I still love you.

This is how I really feel inside.

But when they ask me about you?

I look em straight in the eye and say... the past is past, I've forgotten about him

actually I'm trying to tell myself those words
This is a love story I can only hide here ... Not many people around me in the real world understood that I really fell for him.
  Oct 2021 Enegbuma Angelica k
Words meant for you, I told someone else.

When I should be in your arms, I find myself lying some place else.
Walking on egg shells
Like waiting for someone to crack.
Tip toeing
Hiding beneath a mask.
Queue's  in the supermarket as long as a mile.
Can't cope with this dam atmosphere.
It's like walking on a tight rope
Higher than one can bear.
Shut in a cage like an animal.
Let out like a dog for exercise
The injustice of it all.
and for what .
Still death looms and domains. The earth.
If this is all life's about
What's the point

Well we could all say give up.?
Let's throw the towel in .
No don't because there must be an answer to all this misery..
Tears pour out every minute....
It seems like all would be better if I just faded away. It felt like the Earth's upside down and I am  the only one standing straight.
       No matter what I did, I couldn't just join the world.
When I finally got the grasp of things, I felt weird. I looked like another person when standing in front of the mirror.
        I felt like this when I get back home from a long day at work.
I don't like the Job.
I don't like the People.
I don't like being a star.

Then... I finally met 'Jayden'
We dated for a while.
Not six months.
Not six years.
For ten years.
How can you move on?
Personally, I don't think one can move on...
You can say....
We find something or someone distracting
If you really said I LOVE YOU...
and meant it...
Moving on is not an option...

We broke up but we are still friends...
Then you didn't mean it
it was just an infatuation... lust?
but, you didn't mean it
If I say I love you...
Then.... I DO.

Think of me anyhow you like but if I'm asked
How can you move on?
I can't... cause I said  "I love you"
I can't... cause I meant those words.
I can't... cause I was real.
This is what I feel and think...
What's yours?
An hour can sometimes feel like eternity but,
Can sometimes also feel like a moment; a second passed by.
Time waits for no man
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