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I will say
I do not love you
until my mouth forgets your taste

I will write
I do not love you
until my fingers forget
how your hands feel, wrapped in mine
and my poems no longer
reek of sadness and desperation

I will believe
I do not love you
until it becomes impossible
or until I begin
to love someone new
 Apr 5 Holly
Do you want to know why I’m like this?
Do you really want to know what’s wrong?
The problem is you.
It’s all of you.
This is what happens
When you abandon your friends
When you ignore the people around you
When you take advantage of your family

People aren’t designed for that
Humans require community
And as I watch you all
Finding ways to love each other
I sit in quiet jealousy
To not make you feel shame

But to tell you the truth
I’m dying
Depression is eating away at my soul
I can’t survive alone
Not much longer
Not like this
 Apr 4 Holly
I  took  my wrist  and  cut  myself,
just  to  open  up  to  you.
And you  watched  my blood  as  it  touched  the ground.
I  waited for  you  to  move from the miles  you  put between us.
I  hoped that  you would come help  me close my wound.
Instead,  you  pretended  as  if  you  did not see  me.
And you turned around and walked   in the opposite direction.
Adding more distance  between  us.
 Mar 30 Holly
 Mar 30 Holly
The more I see him clearly,
the more I realize
his intentions
are blurry.
 Mar 30 Holly
 Mar 30 Holly
red wine
stained our lips,
with clumsy hands
tracing moonlight
on your skin.
our love got sweeter
with each stolen kiss
and in those moments
i knew,
i would follow you
to any ruin.
- all i could breathe was you.
 Mar 30 Holly
Luna Maria
It’s where we smoked our cigarettes
because we were already living for way too long
but we never jumped of the roof

we only let the smoke
burn our lungs from inside out
and wanted death to come closer slowly.
two fallen angels on a rooftop
 Mar 30 Holly
Luna Maria
 Mar 30 Holly
Luna Maria
do we fear the love
we think we don't deserve?
"you deserve someone better than what I could ever be for you."
 Mar 30 Holly
Luna Maria
Does it count as a heartbreak too,
when you stop loving yourself?
I want to fall in love with myself again
 Mar 30 Holly
Luna Maria
the silence
hurts more
than the
I get replaced so easily
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