I cannot lose what fills
   my heart more than blood
   my lungs more than air
   myself more than me

My thoughts, my head, everything seems to turn into a reality
To think such actions could turn into a tragedy
To think the things I said meant so much to you
To sit and think to you is who I owe my apology
Every bone in my body seems to be bothering me
Is it guilt, is it your words, maybe the dreams
Every temptation isn’t as good as it seems
It wasn’t good, it just took my mind off of the good things
Everything that had you in it was good
But things to me was never clear or understood
Complaints, complaints, complaints, is all I hear
My mind never seems to rest
It never seems to settle
All the thoughts in my head seem to be put in this message
So heaven sent, so perfect, but my mentality was never right
I love you, yet I made this big mistake
To distance myself and make you go away
To be gifted with such a cruel punishment that never took my feelings away
My punishment, my punishment, my punishment, good lord my punishment
Made me grow, but yet I feel weak
It took days, weeks, and years just to settle my heart
Loving you I never regret, not showing my love, not giving you my best
My unsure mentality lead to such a tragedy
To my future lady the thoughts of this might keep you mad at me

I dive nose first into your inner essence
there in your yellow *******
your mighty flowering all the way from your roots
in the succulent whiteness of your blossoming being
you reveal to the world what it means
to disclose, expose and surrender
your deep secrets
to all who stop to take notice,
to him who planted and nurtured you
to your magnificent wholeness
to the creator of the universe
in which you flourish.

Your scent is a hint
of the mystery which is you
my sweet magnolia blossom.