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Aug 2020 · 135
Chemical Burn
Haley Harrison Aug 2020
You're perfect for me, but I'm not perfect for you -

time to face reality, I know that much is true;

Even though it hurts, like a chemical burn on bare skin:

10-molar hydrogen peroxide in comparison seems like a pin.

I promised I'd stop talking about you - I'm driving my friends insane;

so now I'm left alone, silent in my pain.

You make me want to be better, to reach for the stars,

igniting dreams I gave up on, healing old scars.

Nobody else is enough, whatever they do,

why can't I love another, instead of you?

I have no shortage of suitors - why can't I quit

this useless addiction, destroying me bit by bit?

I could be happy, if only I weren't stuck

on what I can't have, what's beyond my luck.

I need to travel, to get away far,

to another galaxy, find a new star.

Unfinished - my thread of thought breaks -

I'll forget about you - whatever it takes.
04.04.2019.

(for S.)
Aug 2020 · 133
Louder
Haley Harrison Aug 2020
Metal music, vintage sound

feel the beat pulse all around;

Louder! Drown out my heartbeats,

drown out this fire that burns and overheats.

Play louder than my heart, perhaps I'll forget,

that it tears me apart, this unresolved bet.

Schrödinger's cat of blissful ignorance,

a stalemate, a draw, merciful ambivalence.

We could be a pair, like tequila and salt,

I'll just keep dreaming, 'til I wake with a jolt.

Smoke in my lungs, my hair in my face,

I'm lulled into numbness, in the music's embrace.

Sensory overload of lights and sound,

In a club's chaos, clarity I found:

Things will work out, in whatever way,

and even if they don't, I'll be okay.

Whatever happens, I know I can handle,

for I am a forest fire, not just a candle.
30.3.2019.
Aug 2020 · 151
Bubbles and Sand
Haley Harrison Aug 2020
I obsessed over soap bubbles when I was a child:

how they dance in the wind, beautiful and wild;

so free, so perfect, but disappearing too fast,

and you're no different - too quickly our time has passed.

Like sand through my fingers, you're slipping away

I can't think of an excuse to make you stay

other than the reasons I dare not tell,

so I let you go, silent in my hell.


Even when you're not around, you're always in my head,

Overthinking everything: how you acted, what you said;

Looking for a hint, grasping at straws,

ignoring the doubt, evading its claws.

I'm happier not knowing, I'm too afraid

to break this glass castle my poems have made.

And so, like sand through an hourglass,

our time together continues to pass.

Never enough time, never enough sand,

I keep staring at my now empty hand.
29.3.2019.

(for S.)
Aug 2020 · 97
Fly
Haley Harrison Aug 2020
Fly
Like nothing else matters, you make me feel free,

I could move mountains with you next to me.

I could reach out and touch the sky,

do anything I wish, with you I could fly.


I know you're not perfect, but neither am I,

we make each other better, higher than high.

Arms I could melt into, safe and sound,

just thoughts of you lift me off of the ground.

I walk the city streets, floating in clouds,

wrapped in fluffy fantasies, not noticing the crowds.


As long as there's the slightest chance,

I won't give up, I love this trance.

I could live off your smile, I've said it before,

Never enough of you, I always want more.

If I had to cast a Patronus, the image is clear:

the memory of you laughing drives away any fear.

The brightest star in a constellation, softest note in a song,

I've never been in love before, until you came along.

Even across distances, I wouldn't forget

this feeling, this fire, on that you can bet.

Only on you my heart is set,

I owe you all these poems - what a lovely debt.

Just say the word, I'll fall into your arms,

There's no way I could ever resist your charms.
28.3.2019.

(for S.)
Aug 2020 · 153
Instant Asthma
Haley Harrison Aug 2020
From tall steeples church bells' ring,

Cupid's arrow has a painful sting.

And still of you I long to sing,

my heart glows blue, a crystal bling.

To stay away, I could not endure,

for this affliction I know no cure.


But writing soothes and numbs the ache,

red-hot coals, thrown in a lake.

Still, no lake is quite so cold

to quench these embers, truth be told.


When you walk in, I feel like I need an inhaler

- instant asthma - your eyes make stars seem paler.

Every time I make you laugh,

half of my soul meets the other half.

I said I'd quit, that these poems are done,

but I relapse, sentimentality has won.

In the morning again I'll say:

"There is no us, there is no way",

But evening melancholy crystallizes into rhyme,

the urge to write keeps winning every time.

Like an alcoholic taking a shot every other day,

I can't get over you if I can't get away.

And I don't want to, no matter what they say,

this fatal addiction - I wouldn't have it any other way.

Even if I get on my own nerves during day,

the nights are ours, as sleepless I lay.

Up until 3 am, thinking of the perfect metaphor,

for the call of my muse I cannot ignore.

So, call me silly, call me a fool,

I'm a romantic, under love's rule.
27.3.2018.

(for S.)
Aug 2020 · 171
Language of You
Haley Harrison Aug 2020
Like a foreign language, I've learnt to read your face,

the changing expressions, synced with conversation's pace.

I can tell when there's something else on your mind,

or when there's a right word you're trying to find.

The way you raise your eyebrows at an interesting story,

or burst into laughter - my heart beats away to glory.

The way your face lights up, when you're making a joke,

and that lingering smile, even after you spoke.


Your speech dynamic, I know the melody,

the rhythm, the places where pauses will be.

Like a living book, I study each phrase,

a fascinating read, to get lost in your gaze.


I can't find a flaw, not a single misspelling,

no irregular verbs, just a story for telling.

And what a plot, a writing style that captivates me so,

A page-turner, every paragraph and row.


I speak many languages - learning them is fun -

but the language of you is my my favourite one.
25.3.2019.

(for S.)
Aug 2020 · 121
Lost Smiles
Haley Harrison Aug 2020
My smiles keep getting lost on their way to you,

ending up everywhere except where they're meant to;

You're a Northern star, unreachable to ships at sea,

but an indicator of direction, of where they should be.


Like petals of cherry blossom the wind blows away,

they're too fragile and light, to be able to stay.

I envy the breeze that caresses your face,

softly, like the gentle touch of fine lace.


And my smiles wander, disoriented still,

sensing the space between us, that they try to fill;

a bridge of smiles, held together by hope,

a love letter in a transparent envelope.


So I keep waiting, like a bud awaits the spring,

hopeless yet hoping, a bell on a string -

a silent melody, safely stored away,

waiting for Dawn, for the light of day.
25.3.2019.

(for S.)
Aug 2020 · 135
Conflagrate
Haley Harrison Aug 2020
Heartbeats in my eardrums, the rhythm of despair;

nobody ever said love was fair.

I know you are poison, I am well aware,

yet I cannot bring myself to care.


I clutch this rose, whose thorns bleed me dry,

drunk on the scent, so high I fly.

The crimson petals and blood drops that fall,

a lonely violin melodies a call.

Like Fire, the thorns burn into my palm,

I'd never let go – you are my calm.


At your command, a hypnotized thrall,

my soul, my love, you can have it all.

A dream, a dream! this must be it –

it overwhelms me bit by bit:

Sparks to stars to supernova light,

frost to 'flakes to an avalanche in white.


– My thoughts – in pieces – incandescent shine –

Conflagrate – this fantasy – finally mine –.
24.3.2019.

(for S.)
Aug 2020 · 107
Irony
Haley Harrison Aug 2020
It's ironic that I keep addressing

these poems to you, to whom I'm confessing;

yet you will never read a single line,

just like you won't ever be mine.


We haven't much in common, truth be told,

you're a go-getter, and I'm not that bold.

You are the Fire - I merely smoke,

you're the real deal, I'm just a joke.

A reflection, a shadow, a distant dim glow,

the inklings of frost on a winter window.

Broken up pieces of soft sea glass,

a whisper that quickly will fade and pass.


You wouldn't even like this fluttery rhyme,

these wings without bodies that fly into time,

disappear in the veil of an anonymous abyss,

ephemeral sparkles that no one will miss.


My soul trickles into every verse;

not for a moment did I regret this curse.

It's bittersweet, this lovely pain,

your presence is a diamond rain -

sharp and brilliant, all in one.

You are the Moon, but also the Sun.
24.3.2019.

(for S.)
Aug 2020 · 363
Mad Heart
Haley Harrison Aug 2020
They ask me what I like about you -

as if it could be said in a sentence or two...

As if words could even express,

all the ways in which you make me a mess.


Oh, mad heart, if you could just quit

wishing and yearning, just for a bit.

I need a rest, from this lasting ache,

to stop thinking about him, asleep or awake.

Just give up, just don't, there isn't a hope,

you delude yourself, just start to cope.


"It's better to know then to keep wondering" -

but could I stand the rejection's sting?

Just holding these feels, it's too much to bear,

Sorry, can't help it, I simply care.

This way, at least, I'm the one to blame,

this way, I don't have to face the shame.

Somehow, it feels, just like control,

I'm hurting but I made the call.

Giving up and losing are two different things,

one pain is dull, the other one stings.

This way you won't feel sorry for me,

this way I get to keep my dignity.

Gracefully retrieve, and bow my head,

it's better, for all, that nothing is said.

I can't fight for you, that's not how it's done,

stubbornness isn't how love is won.

Perchance, I pray, I am mistaken,

From this bad dream, I might be awakened?

You might be braver, reach out first,

finally quench this maddening thirst?

Oh, it's a fool's heart speaking again,

a dreamer's mist; wondering "when?"

when will you notice, what a blindman could see,

what I feel everyone notices already?

Darling, answer my silent plea,

don't be cruel, I pray thee.

For when you look deep into my eyes,

you must know, there cannot be any lies.

It's cowardly of me, to leave it to you,

Sorry, again; that's all I can do.

I'll stay nearby, since I can't get away,

an ember of hope, a dawn of a day.

But regardless of all, I need to say,

thank you, my muse, my sunlight ray.
23.3.2019.

(for S.)
Aug 2020 · 114
Guard
Haley Harrison Aug 2020
You never let down your guard.

Charming and polite; a poker-face behind the card.

Around you are walls of smiles and lies,

a fortress in which the true you hides.


I wonder if you are a little like me,

behind that mask of "always carefree".

I think there's more to you, for the little things you say,

quietly, in the evening, more truthfully than during day.

You're a little too perfect, to be fully real,

and I'm dying to know - what is your deal?

You keep declining, to join us and drink,

you must have your reasons, and that makes me think.

I won't drink either, since it's of no use

in forgetting about you - it just lights the fuse.

Though it would be easier, to just blame the liquor,

and the liquid courage, that makes it all quicker.

But there you go being a Good Influence on me,

my Silent Suffering, my Penance, my Ecstasy.
21.03.2019.
(for S.)
Aug 2020 · 146
Sinusoid
Haley Harrison Aug 2020
My mood is a sinusoid - either bliss or the void.

You throw me in shackles, then give me a crown;

I get my hopes up, before they crash back down.

You make me grow wings, then clip them in an instant

with all the little things that make you seem distant.

A kind word, a smile, and I'm in a dreamy cloud,

until my doubts return, harsh, black, and loud.

I weigh every word, read too much into yours,

it's getting absurd, my heart falls and soars.


I'll get away! Move on, have a fresh start -

and then you smile - all plans fall apart.

I rise and then stoop, I break, and I mend,

caught in a loop, a cycle without end;

Just like the heartbeats deep in my chest,

you'll soon speed them into cardiac arrest.

My heart keeps pounding (I must protest!)

to get out, to you, like a bird to its nest.

Nothing else could send it into this craze,

there isn't a chemical as strong as your gaze.

It beats like a bass - that much is true -

because you like techno, and I like you.
20.3.2019.

(for S.)
Aug 2020 · 125
And I Can't Sleep
Haley Harrison Aug 2020
So close, too close, and yet not close enough -

Cupid has bound me to you with a silver cuff;

not that I mind, but I'm in too deep,

thinking about you, and I can't sleep.


Did you feel it too? - how my heart jumped,

I thought the whole room heard how loud it thumped -

when you leaned closer to whisper something,

the rest of my world blurred into nothing.

I'm going insane, just poetry and you,

life seems to have taken on a different hue.

I try to burn this love, collect the ashes in a heap,

but it comes back to life, and I can't sleep.


That smile, that angels would **** for,

every inch of you, all I adore;

I'm losing my breath, drowning in dreams,

empty fantasies, crystal sunlight beams.

Get out of my head, if you're not mine to keep,

you're always on my mind... and I can't sleep.
16.3.2018.

(for S.)
Aug 2020 · 107
Drunk On You
Haley Harrison Aug 2020
So drunk on you, without a drop of alcohol,

there's nothing I can do, even harder I fall

then I've already fallen; I'm high on this overdose,

because until midnight I had you so close.

It's torture, but sweet - just an inch away,

I never want this night to turn into day.


Lost in a chestnut forest that sparkles in your eyes,

we laughed and laughed, I didn't notice how time flies.

And you looked so happy when we won the game,

I wish every night could be the same.

And yet you remain so elusive to me,

a bittersweet pain, what we might be;

So nice to everyone, it's difficult to tell

whether you know, or if you also fell.

Bring me to life - give me a sign,

I have to know if you would be mine.
16.3.2019.

(for S.)
Aug 2020 · 111
If you knew...
Haley Harrison Aug 2020
Would it overwhelm you if you knew?

Today I literally climbed I mountain for you.

And I'd do it again, to see that smile,

to drown in your eyes as I pass each mile.

Would you think less of me, if you knew?

I am a coward. And I will never tell you.

I'm grateful for the tiny, ephemeral things:

your voice is the gentle touch on guitar strings.



So, I take no risks - too high are the stakes;

I prefer little to nothing, to make no mistakes.

You know, from every card-game we played,

I am no gambler, my decisions are weighed.

Or perhaps, more truly, I am afraid,

too lose even these crumbs, if the wrong card is laid.


I wish I could tell you, all that I feel,

but my tongue is tied, on my lips there's a seal.

If you knew everything, from beginning to end,

would you no longer be even my friend?

Are we even that? Do you even care?

Is this image real, or mere lens flare?


You are the Dawn, the flash of light on dewdrops...

I'm just a poet, hollow wind in the treetops...
09.03.2019.
(for S.)

— The End —