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Carson Dees Jul 17
This burden is a boulder
I'm just tripping over
The things in my head
They don't align with anything
My debts and my mistakes
I push if I can't break
Free of these chains,
Some are no longer suffering
But I'm still on this train
That keeps going and going
Over and over
'Til my days are over
I stand on the line
And I can't get across it
I'm waving goodbye
To the few who had made it
My thoughts are too tied
Too tightly to think
And I wonder if I
Will finally break
Under the pressure
And I
Just started to cry
The tears can't hold back
For long anymore
The nonsense, the gibberish,
The thoughts are just flowing
Though the party has ended
But everyone's crowding
There's more at the door
But my world is slowly drowning
And when I finally find
A trickle of hope
It never reaches
My blood is shattering
I feel so alone
My teeth are chattering
From being out in the cold
You can't comprehend
The feelings I'm feeling
'Cause when dust turns to gold
I'll be sitting here thinking
And I don't think that I
Will ever stop rambling
On and on about the things
That bother me most
What the hell am I writing?
My hope is long gone
Or at least it's hiding
All the burdens and thoughts
Will smother me eventually
To the point where I'll never breathe
I'm so broken, someone fix me
So I can be happy.
Carson Dees Jul 11
I've been so good, I've been helpful and friendly,
I've been so good, Why am I feeling empty?
I've been so good, I've been so good this year,
I've been so good, But it's still getting harder,
I've been so good, where the heck is my karma?
I've been so good, I've been so good this year.
Adam, Jack, and Ryan Metzger,
Karma, 2019
Carson Dees Jul 10
I fell two years ago,
How am I still falling?
Carson Dees Jul 10
When life falls apart,
Why are my feet glued to the floor?
Carson Dees Jun 23
I'm ready for the fall.
I'm ready for everything that I believe in to drift away.
Ready for the leaves.
Ready for the colors to burn to gold and crumble away.
-Dan Reynolds
The Fall, 2015
Carson Dees Jun 23
what is it like,
to have hope?
to be happy?
truly happy?
not just a smile,
i slap on my face?

what is it like,
to have lost hope?
to be sad?
truly sad?
because i know.
but it takes yourself
to realize
you are not alone.

you are not worthless.
  Jun 15 Carson Dees
Asuka
You don’t have to rise like the sun each day—
some mornings, it's enough just to open your eyes,
to sit with the silence,
to feel your heartbeat and whisper, “I’m still here.”

You are not the storm that passed,
nor the ruins it left behind.
You are the seed under the soil,
waiting for the right rain,
the quiet miracle of a soul not giving up.

Let no one shame the pace of your healing.
Let no voice drown out the hush of your trying.
Because surviving is not small.
And breathing, on hard days,
is a kind of bravery the world forgets to praise.

So rest, dreamer.
You don’t need to shine tonight.
You just need to stay—
soft, alive,
and wildly worthy of tomorrow.
You push yourself hard and grind everyday and you are doing great, but sometimes when things are overwhelming you must to take a break.
🔥 There’s a time to roar, and a time to breathe.
You can’t fight every day with your fists in the air. Some days, the boldest thing you can do is sit quietly and say,

> “Not today—but I’ll rise again soon.”
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