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i'm so tired of having to break these walls down only to have to rebuild them
at this point, i'm out of energy
so the walls are just going to stay up from now on
i'm not even going to try and break them down
let them build up as they please
i don't care how unhealthy it is to let them exist
but i'm tired of trying to let people in only to bet hurt
i've tried too hard to make other people happy
to not make myself happy
so ***** it
let the walls stay, **** it when you tell me to open up
i'm so sick of opening up and then shutting down again
i don't care if you've been there when the door has opened
it's shut now
and it's not opening anymore
dont say anything to her
 Apr 16 CallMeVenus
Mitchell
Write
I told myself

For I'm guilty and
I like the way it makes me feel
When I don't finish
When I do

Heavy -
With plenty to do

I like my incompleteness
For the way it hangs,
Like the ways
Walls are never high enough
Or borders are never strong enough
Or love
Is never
Ever

Enough.

Write,
I tell myself
I am myself
I am and always will be

For voices
However many they are

Are meant to not just be heard

But felt.

Empathy,
Is the key,
To all of this - us.

Look at music.

They try...

They just have terrible delegates
Why Men Cry in the Bathroom

For so many reasons.
I will tell you the why.
I think you know,
Or perhaps, you think you know.

Men are always O.K.,
Even when not.

We expect the worse,
Accept the worse,
Nonetheless,
We are forever unprepared.

Wearily, we cry,
In the bathroom, in private,
Lest sighs slip by,
We be unmasked,
Early warring, strife signs warning.

Copious, tho we weep
Before the mirror confessor,
It is relief untethered,
Unbinding of the feet,
An uncounting
Of beaded rosaries,
Of freshly fallen hail stones,
Of night times terrors
By dawn's early edition's light,
and welcomed.

But look for the mute tear,
The eye-cornered drop,
*** tat, that never drops,
But never ceases formation and
Reforming, over and over again,
In a state of perpetuity of reconstitution,

The tippy tear of an iceberg revealing,
And I see you peeping, wondering,
What is beneath


Look for:
the torn worm-eaten edges of spirit,
thrift shop bought, extra worn,
grieving lines neath the eyes,
where the salt has evaporated,
discolored the skin.
worry lines,
under and above,
browed mapped, furrowed boundaries.
the laugh line saga,
where better days are stored,
recalled, as well as recanted,
publicly, privately.

Why just men?

I don't know,
Perhaps,
it is all I know.


Jan 6, 2013
your effusive and lengthy comments are each a poem in their own right.  

Tinkered with June 22, 2013
With a push from Bala,
A serial peeper, thank God!
no lights are required

               on the trailers of hindsight

cats eyes never blink

                  <>


now read up ^ ^
not backwards
line by line as
normal, but up.
 Nov 2021 CallMeVenus
Maria
There were days
I remembered
To put my heart on my sleeve.

The other days
I hid it
So deep inside my body
I couldn’t find it for myself.

The terror of anyone finding
Me judging me
Seemed to linger in the air
I inhaled.
 Nov 2021 CallMeVenus
Azure
YOU
 Nov 2021 CallMeVenus
Azure
YOU
I don’t like you.
Not the things you do.
Or say.
Not the way you smile,
Or the times you choose to laugh.
Worst of all when you scream.
You’re my blood,
But you pollute me.
I never want to be you.
I never want to need you.
I hate you.
 Feb 2021 CallMeVenus
emma jane
trace
my palms
until you discover
they are roads
to my heart.

connect
my freckles,  
and imperfections
until they
say,
"i'm healing"

whisper
my heartbeat
into my chest
until i
remember,
the beauty in
it's song

kiss
me until
i'm breathless
so that i
will know
what it is,
to breath

please,
try to mend my broken pieces.

love me back together again
i'm kinda in a major writers block. this is all that's come out of the past few days. please leave feedback and or prompts
 Feb 2021 CallMeVenus
emma jane
sitting at the kitchen table
crying,
and trying to
explain to my mom
why i stayed
while she told me,
with small kaleidoscopes of
warped devastation
pooling in her eyes
and rolling down her cheeks,
that this is scaring her.
because, it sounds like
i’m the type of girl
who stays,
while her husband beats her.
the girl she raised.
sitting at the kitchen table
crying,
and realizing
that when you ran your hands
through my hair as you kissed me,
you were twirling my future around
your fingers.
this is scaring me
because you’ll be the guy
who carved the hole in my chest
that stays
i know i will see your fingerprints
in all the hands that will come after you.

And I Will Run.
 Feb 2021 CallMeVenus
cat
if i ask you about love
will your stories of heartache
burst through the floodgates of your flowery lips
& pour upon my feet

for i have learnt
that love
is little more
then the pains in my chest
that i haven’t felt yet
 Feb 2021 CallMeVenus
cat
-3-
 Feb 2021 CallMeVenus
cat
-3-
you’ve stripped me
of the walls i spent so long
building so high
and so wide
so that no one could enter after the last
and now i have destroyed the;
to be held by you
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