You're hopeless.
Completely utterly lost.
This bizarre abyss of feelings is haunting,
Even your councillor has no idea what you're on about.
Despite this you charge head on,
Armour strong longsword drawn.
Then you shatter into pieces,
As anxiety strokes your face.

Everything is breaking.

Why won't you help me?

It's hard to stress over little things,
Your opinions nothing new.
One hint of truth and snakes bite stings,
The world is bigger than you.

Sometimes when I'm trying to sleep,
I hear the names of people whispered into my ear.
The great characters that I will meet,
And the horrible ones I shouldn't go near.

I think about where life is going,
Completely freaking myself out,
Knowing my friends like when it's raining or snowing,
But my minds in an endless drought.

The hearts I've met with their steady rhythms,
Some black but most red,
Remind me of the feigned smiles I have given,
As their emotions infiltrated my head.

If you're sensitive to the people around you,
It's best to be on your own for a trial,
Until you finally meet somebody new,
Who makes all your patience worthwhile.

A black book of feelings lies on my bedroom floor,
Beside an abandoned book of rambling,
That left my brain sore.

My foot is tapping to my heartbeat,
As my blood is pumped round and round.
While my ears explore the silence,
Of the things that can't be found.

A revolutionary thought appears,
To quickly disappear again,
So I curse my brain remembering that memory isn't my friend.

And my tongue stutters and trips over itself,
Making fools out of my teeth,
As I tell my friends they're materialistic,
For not realizing what's best lies underneath.

It wasn't their fault at all,
They were used, A plaything to be discarded later.

Four days is all is took,
Four ******* days to find someone new.
This heartless *****, have you heard her laugh?
It's like a bullet through an open wound.

Of course this was bound to happen,
These types of people never change.
Breaking their heart was her work of art,
And the on-lookers made her stage.

A mess she made my friend,
Who was super glued together by hope and lies.
Their calloused fingers couldn't feel out the beauty from betrayal,
So they were stuck dumb and blind.

The puppeteer grew bored,
As she drowned her victim in blood,
And you can say whatever you want,
But that definitely wasn't love.

You have a kind heart so you will struggle,
Although this is sad, it is true,
But if you hold onto hope you'll get somewhere,
A place of fresh air and something new.

There are vicious circles you will have to go round,
But with every bruise there comes a lesson,
And sometimes we stumble over ourselves,
But strong arms will catch us and warm voices will ease your tension.

You have a long road ahead of you,
One with cracks, bumps and hills,
So yes, sometimes you will fall down and cry,
But other times you'll be laughing at the thrills.

Please remember this my lovely,
There are some things you cannot change,
and although you will shake and you will be anxious,
Through courage and bravery is how great lives are made.

And I didn't write my essays,
And all my assignments are overdue,
And my Mothers a trainwreck,
And my Sisters are too.

And my Father doesn't care,
And Grandmothers carrying grief,
And my heart hurts beyond repair,
With all the rubble underneath.

And I didn't write my essays,
And all my assignments are overdue,
And all my Friends think I'm happy,
But all my Friends are trainwrecks too.

And I didn't write my essays,
And all my assignments are overdue,
And I'm too much of a coward to **** myself,
So I guess numbness will have to do.

You didn't like the fact I had leg hair,
So I showed you my armpit hair too,
Then you grimanced in utter disgust,
Just how shallow are you?

This natural thing that grows,
All over your body aswell,
Has you cringing and backing away,
Are you tangled up in some hair like hell?

Do you scream when you see beards?
Or carry a razor everywhere you go?
You've got to get the stupid idea out of your head,
That on ladies hair doesn't grow.

Superficial feelings seem to run the world,
Along with the idea that to be attractive,
You have to be skinny with teeth as white as pearls.

Whilst you consume sugar,
That gnaws at your bones,
And the smoke that your inhaling,
Helps the Cancer grow.

The salt in your body,
Gives you high blood pressure,
And the drugs that your snorting,
Make friends with Schizoprenia.

How beautiful it is to find,
That your decaying inside,
Whilst your abide in alcohol,
Only kissing people to keep your tongue busy.

But it doesn't matter,
It's never mattered,
Cause at least your pretty.

This song we sing is dissonant,
It's harsh but it's the truth,
Our blundering amazes me,
As obvious as a missing tooth.

I thought our friendship fruitful,
Even on this barren land,
But you then said you were sick of me,
The opposite of what I'd planned.

What used to be harmonious,
A tune that we could both play,
Soon became too jarring,
I didn't know what to say.

I cry because it was beautiful,
A lovely sweet-sounding hum,
Now ruined by the clash of cymbals,
We can't undo what we've done.

Sleep.
The one thing I need that that avoids me.
My body is telling me I must rest now,
But my mind is saying "No."
There's so much to think about,
So much to remember,
So many hearts to mourn over.
Sleep that one word that hates me,
Because I'm friends with his enemy.
They call her "Insomnia."

My Nephew won't stop wailing.

And I thought my Mothers laugh could wake the dead.

You don’t understand,
To me losing my faith,
Is like cutting off my right hand.

You don’t discriminate against,
Gender, race or inquisition,
But you judge me for my religion?

You take my words,
Then twist them with your ignorant tongue,
Like I am some sort of disease that rats have brung.

And condemn me to being an idiot,
Like you’re not a ******,
For refusing to accept my beliefs.

No matter how much you judge me,
No matter how strong you hate,
You will never stop me believing,

Because your opinion is weak compared to my faith.

I don't want to be famous,
Or even well known.
I just want to be snuggled up in bed,
With a cup of tea, A book and my phone.

It's always possible I find,
To try your best to be kind.

And if somebody among you is mean,
Do not fall down to their scene.

You're better than bitter resent,
Even if it's not how they meant.

Do not fall for their trick,
Dodge those nasty words quick!,

Because it's always possible I find,
To try your best to be kind.

All the rumours are,
That you kissed me in the dark,
Cause everybody thinks I'm gay with you.

But the truth has always been,
That our behaviour is obscene,
Especially in front of heteronormative views.

So I'm going to hold your hand in public,
And super glue your heart back together,
Because that boy ripped you apart,

Which means I'm here to make you better.

It’s unresponsive,
You will not hug me back,
You’re sarcastic when I question what you say.
How can I be loved?
When will you understand?
I am related to you by blood,
You love your family,
But it doesn't mean you have to like them.

I saw your hand in her hand,
And on that day I knew,
I could never confess my feelings,
As my eyes spilled tears of blue.

My lovely friend she is upset,
And I wish she wouldn't be,
In one slight chance of her happiness,
I'd turn my body into the sea.

If she wanted an adventure,
I'd chart a way for her to follow,
And if she were still unsatisfied,
My happiness I'd let her borrow.

I'd build her a mighty vessel,
Made out of the strongest wood,
Keep her safe from storm and shipwreck,
Her journey fun and good.

If syrans came calling,
Try to lure her upon the shore,
I, myself would take the falling,
A hundred, a thousand times more.

Her I consider a kinship,
The same origin as me,
Now I wonder how many sisters,
Turn themselves into the sea.

I can feel it in my bones,
Heavy burdens to carry.
I can taste it on my tongue,
Different cultures to marry.
I can hear it in my ears,
Foreign words being spoken.
I can see it in my eyes,
The land of the dead and broken.
I can smell it through my nose,
The incense stick lighting.
I can sense it in my stomach,
The start of the rioting.
My brain is getting misty,
It's numb and it's quick,
But when the knife cut my throat,
I didn't feel a thing.

Broken, Broken, Broken.
Cursed at the edge.
The bottle smashed on the table,
Sharp half in your hand.
Pointing very stubbornly,
Straight at my heart,
Enforcing love gently,
This is where the killing starts.

I will not confine myself anymore.
There are far too many people here,
And this box is getting crowded.

There are shadows of people I knew,
Reserved spaces for people I will meet,
But I have barely got any room left.

Don't you dare try to control me.
I survive for me and me alone,
I happily live in my box.

But there is no more room!
How can I breathe in a crowded box?
Self doubt is crippling me.

And before I know it,
I am trapped inside myself.

How can you love me?
When I look like this.
I've got spots on my body,
And stretch marks on my hips.

How can you find me attractive?
When my stomach sticks out.
I haven't got a thigh gap,
And I don't know how to pout.

What do you find so compelling?
There's nothing much here.
I'm just a tired brain,
Suffocated in fear.

Out of control,
My minds got a voice.
I can't console my memories,
And I haven't got a choice.
This world is not my destiny.
I don't understand,
How can you have me so securely in the palm of your hand?

My pathways are in construction,
I'm lost and it's dark.
So how do you remember the directions leading straight to my heart?

My blood won't clot,
My scars won't heal,
Tell me now do you understand,
Exactly how I feel?

Busy yourself with writing,
Poetry, Music, whatever.
Smother yourself with the enlightening vision,
Of two people being together.

Stifle yourself with feelings,
And never let them know.
That the sea you're swimming in is freezing,
And they're the undertow.

Those shoes have got pizzazz,
It's true as it's told,
Their sparkling glitter vibrant colours,
A thousand questions old.

That shirt is very busy,
Busier than most,
Destroyed by hurried businessman,
Spilling tea and toast.

These trousers are a tight fit,
squeezing in the gore,
Of sugar, chocolate, donuts,
With a million calories more.

Your eyes are very dull,
Their tired and their red,
Like the judgement of a few strangers,
Fills your heart with dread.

Your mind is very lonely,
A desolate place to be,
For if you never loose control of your inhibitions,
You'll never truly be free.

The inevitability of you is astounding,
You're a pretty flower nobody can help but pick.
But there are many snakes in this garden,
So please be cautious.

I've heard your laughter windswept across the sea front,
Many a brave sailor has come to visit you.
You're a rare catch,
Nobody can help but fish for.

I've seen thunderstroms in your eyes,
As birds swoop past to escape your wrath.
You're an off the richter scale earthquake,
Nobody can forget.

The vulnerability of you is astounding,
You're a thistle nobody can cut back.
Many people have come to **** your garden,
So I am being cautious.

Her beautiful face was burning,
From your words spat like acid.
Her shape to be reconstructed,
Because you didn't like the way it flared out.

As if she is not allowed to control her destiny,
Because "Being allowed is a privilege."
But her face is melting like a candle,
Wax splattering on the floor.

You tell her not to make such a mess,
As you degrade her down more

This relationship is poisonous,
Flowing through her bloodstream,
That used to be pure and healthy.

Ah, You tell me that you love her,
But this is not love,
When she states her opinion,
And you stop her with a hardened shove.

Her face is still melting!
Can you not see?
That all the things you do,
Just end in catastrophe.

That's irrelevant.
You caused this war,
You, Your money,
And fat ******* *****.

It’s not that I don’t love you,
I love you far too much.
It’s just that I fear,
Darling we may lose touch.
Your heart is beautiful.
My gosh you make me swoon,
But most love stories are tragic,
And lead to certain doom.

Give me some time,
I need to understand.
Is it my heart that you want?
Or just for people to see you holding my hand?
I told you not to rush,
These things take time.
But you simply grinned,
Saying you were mine.

You tell me that you love him,
But you don’t even know his name.
You obsess over his nature,
Whilst damaging his delicate frame.

Catastrophes your forte,
And it seems a real shame,
When you love someone so much,
That you bound them in chains.

Haunting every moment,
The plague of you is there.
It’s in the way they speak the way they walk,
Almost like you’re in their hair.

Directing every breath,
You catch their souls bare.
You think that you are loving,
But you’re causing them despair.

He sips his fruit smoothie,
Then inhaling his cigarette,
How contradictory can someones life get?

When you dance around the room,
No worry in your eyes,
I can feel the doom,
That's society's going to revive.

We do not fit it,
I know that very well,
But who said I wanted to?
Your ideals can go to hell.

Dancing around my empty house,
With knickers on my head,
Thanking God that today,
I actually got out of bed.

It's sad when things fade. Like when friends drift apart,
Or that song you used to listen to on repeat becomes boring.
Really, It’s not sad.
Just you moving on with your life,
Evolving into a fresher, more complex version of yourself.

Time moves ridiculously quickly.
No one ever thinks to pause and look around for a bit.
We can't take life for granted.
It can be taken from us at any second of any day to yourself,
Or those you love.

Don't judge people.
Don't wish people harm.
Just learn to accept and appreciate those around you a lot more then you do now,
Cause I bet you've spent your life mainly thinking about yourself, and for a while that's good.
Self-healing is good and is a way of rebuilding broken parts.
But once you're superglued back together again, think of others.

Tell your family you love them more,
And when parting for the day give them a hug.
Do nice things for them randomly.
Whenever they're not expecting it.
Plant love like poppy seeds,
And nurture it until it blooms fully and is brighter than first thought possible.

Think for yourself but do not become ignorant.
Debate and embrace others opinions,
So that you do not become small minded or obtuse.

If people try to harm you,
Work out why.
Confront them and demand an answer,
But do not shout. Remain calm and collected.
If they have not got a proper reason (Not that there ever is one)
Take them out of your life.
Erase them and their negativity.
The hate will fade away.

They cannot affect you if you do not let them.

Remain strong.
Remain honest.
But most of all,
Remain yourself.

I have not got writers block,
It has not lasted for days.
I have not been miserable,
Digging my own grave.

I have idea where I'm going,
So a street I will pave.
My ****** features seem distorted,
Do you think I'm brave?

Facing my own Demons,
When attention is all I crave.

He danced like an idiot,
Just a clash of uncontrollable limbs,
And an array of contorting ****** expressions.

She tried her best to save me,
Had redemption slathered on her tongue,
But I was a goner before she found me,
There was nothing she could have done.

I swam across an ocean,
To save your drowning body.
I revived you on the beach,
Your clothes wet and soggy.
Never had I imaged,
As soon as you opened your eyes,
That you'd thank somebody else.
Oh, What a surprise.