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Rhiannon Oct 2018
My invisble friends carved their names onto trees,
Then a sick feeling in my stomach lurches like the broken bark.
Overused names sit sticky in my throat,
When broken down fantasies are denied exsistence.

Courage builds up in my bones,
But brittle begging forbids it.
My heart heavy like brickwork,
Tries to pound it's way outside my chest.

Delicate musk coats my body,
Like an effort to impress you.
Rich waves of belonging attach to me,
But all I feel is rotten inside.

Misleading practices go on throughout the day,
The gentle humming in my brain switches to crying,
As hopelessness indulges my senses,
Please, There has to be more than this.
Rhiannon Feb 2016
They travel in packs,
The ring leader the main culprit.
These "lovely girls" with their scowling eyes,
Their latest victim unaware.
Their claws are sharp,
Voices vile,
Seems that being a ***** is truly in style.
Rhiannon May 2016
She and He flirt all the time,
Over the group chat wasting pick up lines.
But what She does not know is He had me first.
I was the main course and she is dessert.
Rhiannon Apr 2016
When everything is numb,
And you can't comprehend,
The difference between your worst enemies and your best friend.
Rhiannon Jun 2016
I cannot breathe.
My lungs have stopped working,
Because crippling aniexty is making me heave,
And I can feel depression smirking.
Rhiannon Dec 2015
And then from that very moment I knew.
These feelings weren't natural,
They were created and manipulated from your own self pity.
Debated about and figured out.
They have never been natural.
Rhiannon Aug 2016
I’ve never been good with feelings,
But then neither have you.
Especially when you’ve got a mother,
Who criticises everything you do.

Tears seem to stream,
Whenever she’s involved,
It seems neither of my parents want me,
And I’ve never felt so unloved.
Rhiannon Nov 2016
You said you were "Fine."
But I don't think you understand what "Fine" means.
It insinuates that you're ok,
Erasing the voices in your head that make your brain decay,
Causing a mass of anomalies to appear in front of you.

You told me you were "Fine."
But I've seen your wrists and I don't think they cut themselves.
It was all far too cliche for you to admit,
The fact that you need help.

'Cause I don't wan't to wake up without you,
Your bright smile makes my day,
And your soft words are of virtue,
That chase all the monsters away.

You cannot leave me now,
We're in too deep,
Both stuck in mud,
As the negatives devour our feet.
Rhiannon Feb 2016
Just underneath the screaming,
Whispers gently caress your ears.
They tell you all the secrets,
The ones that are important,
Rather then the screaming ones,
Who tell you what your eager ears want to hear.

You want to hear the gossip,
Everything that appears.
Why are you so content on listening to the screaming?
When the whispers are the beautiful ones.
Shut your lips and focus on hearing,
Listen to the silence that sings exquisitely.
Rhiannon Sep 2016
"For a God that preaches love and tolerance, I cannot imagine that he would condemn a love that is true regardless of physical body".
I don't know who said this but it's just a brilliant quote.
Rhiannon Mar 2016
Forever the lone wolf in love.
You cannot change an independent woman's way of living,
But sometimes these walls I've built close in.
Crushing me under the weight,
The weight of my self-induced loneliness.
Rhiannon Jun 2016
He's got a smirk for a smile,
And keeps himself in top form,
He'll ace any trial,
And fight his way through any storm.

His broad shoulders are mine,
To rest my head upon,
As he talks about the times,
We forgave each other's wrongs.
Rhiannon Jul 2017
The blood of the lamb is smeared,
above my front door.
Protecting me from mockery, demons, the devil,
And many more.

A candle burns above my fireplace,
reminding me of your light,
knowing that I am safe from all harm,
tucked into bed at night.

Your voice whispers warmly,
into my ear.
keeping away the dreadful thoughts,
cleansing my mind of fear.

Your name powerful enough,
to make the darkness hide.
A symbol of your sacrifice,
strong wings stretched wide.

Forgiveness and love,
your humble being preaches,
and when I see a white dove,
you're in the middle of one of your speeches.

Smiling wide, living,
You catch me when I fall,
And if I ever feel I am being pushed down,
You lift me up so I am tall.
Rhiannon Jan 2019
This year we will prosper,
Be bright and ready to run.

Ahead towards fertile ideas,
Onwards towards the sun!
Rhiannon Mar 2016
Stop freaking out,
People have to come to terms with these things.
One breath can calm you down,
Just breathe.
No one's restricting your windpipe.
Rhiannon Jun 2016
I see a mountain between us,
I see the glare from your eyes,
I see the concept of forgiveness,
Worn on your smile as a disguise.

I see a land made of egg shells,
One step wrong and we all fall down,
I see the blood of a martyr,
Weeping from the crystals in your crown.

I'm not giving up on you,
That's the last thing I'm going to do,
And I've known you for far too long,
For this friendship to go wrong,
So please don't block me out.

I see the hunger of a vampire,
Feeding off of all my pain,
I see insanity in your eyes,
I see all the attention that you crave.

I feel the shape of your fingernails,
Sinking deep within my heart,
And I see the triumph in your features,
When I finally fall apart.
Rhiannon Oct 2016
You told me that you liked me,
Then went on to snarl behind my back,
And I never thought you would Strike me,
Until the knife was deep in my back.
Rhiannon May 2018
If I was given the entire universe,
Upon a silver platter,
Would you like a piece for yourself?
Would it even matter?

If you were given the warmth of the sun,
To defrost your frozen bones,
Would you share the sunlight with me?
Or keep it for you alone?

If I was told to vanish from existence,
Would you put up a fight?
Or would you cave in and agree?
To tired to use your might.

If you were given all the answers,
To life's endless questions,
Would you indulge me in the truth?
Or wouldn't you even mention?

If I was struggling day after day,
Would you feel the ache?
Or would you smile plastic and tight lipped?
As your mask starts to crumble and flake.

If you were given a chance to paint me,
Would you create beautiful art?
Or would you declare me a philitine?
Then drain all the colour from my heart.
Rhiannon Mar 2017
Well Adam says to Eve,
"You're made from one of my ribs".
She's says "Nah, Now you're telling fibs".
Rhiannon Mar 2018
If I were to tell you I liked a girl,
Would you be ashamed?
Would you make me confess my sins at Church?
On a Bible my hand laid.

If I were to kiss her delicate ribs,
Count them one by one,
Would you taunt me with the one Adam gave up?
Try to change me by force and shun.

If I were to fall in love with her brilliant mind,
Would you drown me in my doubts?
Condemn me to a life of a lie confined,
By your mockery and your shouts.

If I were to caress her beautiful soul,
With tender words and care,
Would you wound me with words of hate?
Your anger making knots in my hair.

If I were to tell you I liked a girl,
Someone the same *** as I,
Would you accept me and embrace change?
Or wouldn't you even try?
God
Rhiannon Jun 2016
God
God give me the strength,
To survive this day.
Let my heart repent for the bad things I say,
Teach me to be humble,
And tell me that everything will be ok.

Guide me when I'm lost,
Make me appreciate the way I am.
Let me hold hands with my enemies,
And give me the courage to stand against my fears,

Comfort me,
Please wipe away my tears.
And I devote my every breath to you.
Rhiannon Jan 2017
Do not take the Earth for granted,
It's eroding as we speak.

We've polluted the air and pulled out the plants,
Yet, You wonder why the wind shrieks.
Rhiannon Jan 2017
He snarls his hate righteously,
Leaving Cancer causing chemicals in the air,

And you digest the deceit from his poisonous tongue,
As his lies tangle in your hair.
Rhiannon Jul 2016
It's far too hot.
I've opened the window,
But it hasn't helped much.

I can feel the cold breeze,
But nothing seems to be working.

A book in my hand,
Trying to distract myself,
No not from the heat,
But from your absence.
Rhiannon Jun 2017
I was walking home,
And I swear I saw,
Somewhere in the sky,
The clouds forming into a laughing man,
As another soul kissed this world Goodbye.
I grieve with you.
Rhiannon May 2020
An unsettled feeling twists in my gut, as I think of everything I haven't done. Every ounce, fragile pound of weight set upon my bones, leaves me lethargic. There is more to my life than work. My friends are embodiments of love, that God or whoever made us, gave to ease our pain. I am caught in the joy of movement. The joy of travel. The idea that escapism is enough. But how do you escape your own brain? How do you escape your own body? This life is what you make of it. But I want to know what made me. Am I truly in control? Or is this all some sort of sick joke? My thoughts are made up of question marks. But question marks do not give me answers. And what if I get the answers I want but they don't settle right with me?

What if this life is made up of more than question marks?
Rhiannon Aug 2017
We're going nowhere,
Like a car that's broken down,
Or a king that's stopped his reign,
Cause someone's smashed his crown.

Or we're playing a bored game,
But you don't realise it's your turn,
So I wait and I wait,
As my insides rot and my thoughts churn.

I've tried to be patient,
But my heart is wearing thin,
Cause if you don't bother at all,
How'd you expect us to win?

I've tried my best,
But it's your turn now,
So don't just sit there baffled,
Like I'm the one who's made you frown.
Rhiannon Aug 2016
He just sits there day after day,
A pensive expression and an ash tray.
His car of blue now smells of smoke,
His lungs are black and coughs are chokes.

He just sits there day after day,
A pensive expression and an ash tray.
Has no family so he works all the time,
And he always looks knackered but he says he's fine.

He just sits there day after day,
A pensive expression and an ash tray.
He finally got a promotion for working so hard,
Too bad it was made up of cigarettes and cards.

He just sits there day after day,
A pensive expression and an ash tray.
As he takes his final puff and teeth decay,
He just sits there day after day.
Rhiannon Dec 2015
Find something to do.
Write yourself a poem,
Ignore your emotions,
They're not worth knowing.
Try to control your mind,
Try to control your voice,
Look as if in this world you actually have a choice.
Pity me for crying,
Get angry when I yell,
Just get me out ,
Of this earth like hell.
Rhiannon Jun 2016
There seems to be a problem,
A problem with humanity,
As it seems we have no sanity left,
Because surviving committed that theft long ago.

People have forgotten how to feel,
We have lost sight of what is real,
And no one is allowed an opinion anymore without repercussions.

It's as though we're in a drought of genuine people,
Humans who feel and talk about what is real.
**** your ideals,
I don't care "What appeals?"
All I care about is surviving,
Surviving on this rotting hell of a planet.
Rhiannon Aug 2017
I was mean to my sister the other day,
And then she started crying,
I was mean because she told me, "You never help".
When all week I'd been trying.

She tugs my heart strings of frustrated symphonies,
Makes me feel bad when I stand up for myself,
Then complaines to my Mother about my horrible behaviour,
As if she didn't induce it when like stones her words pelt.

I'd swim oceans to save her drowning mind,
But she never seems to care,
So she yells, sighs and stomps like a child of two,
Whilst in frustration I pull at my hair.
Rhiannon Dec 2015
He told me that he loved me,
And I believed his lie.
Then every time he kissed me,
I felt a part of my heart die.
Trapped to a land corrupt,
He had me bound in chains.
Why did I believe you,
When you said you changed?
Rhiannon May 2017
We’re both very awkward,
But it works very well.
I can’t imagine life without you,
Cause in my heart you always dwell.

Your laughter sporadic yet tantalizing,
Is a beautiful sound to me,
Even if you do sound like a lost seagull,
Being chased by a cat up a tree.
He's completely barmy.
Rhiannon Apr 2017
You slate me again,
and I'll take your name apart letter by letter,
Until your left to nothing but a sobbing mess,
as your infected, rotten heart eats away at your skin,
Weeping out of your chest.
If you're harmful with your actions,
I'll be murderous with my words.
Rhiannon Feb 2016
You regret the past,
But it will never last,
When you bruise her skin.

And I can foresee a war,
Like none before,
So Darlin' please don't let him in.
Rhiannon Apr 2017
I don't like you,
or the way that you think.

I detest your judgemental brain,
An empty vessel, like The Titanic you sink.
Rhiannon Mar 2016
You smiled so sweetly,
With your fingers crossed behind your back.
The vows you spat lies of a serpent,
Nothing more, Nothing less.

You were so tangled up in yourself,
You forgot to care for others.
I detest your family name,
So thank God I have no brothers.

As you gulped down your poisonous wine.
I'd never thought you'd been so mean,
But you wandered off as if we were fine.
Blocking out our screams.

I find it remarkable you know my name,
As I am the last one.
So tell me Father would it have been the same,
If I were born a son?
Rhiannon Apr 2016
She's always been beautiful,
Beautiful to the eyes.
But these poor boys have no idea,
What horrors lie inside.
Rhiannon Sep 2016
Your tongue is like a knife,
Cutting at my skin.
So how do they expect me to defend myself?
When the blade is sinking in.
Rhiannon Jul 2016
How do I respond,
To everything you say?
When you use your words to inflict harm,
Bully and manipulate.
Rhiannon Mar 2018
I can't seem to find a job,
Which really isn't rare,
But all I want is some stable income,
Enough so I can prepare,

Prepare for when I feel like treating my friends,
Or enough to pay off debts,
I don't want to get stuck in a vicious circle,
Of loan and repay and repent.

It seems that now living costs money,
A smiles a pound a minute
Using those pounds to pay for lottery tickets,
Though we know we'll never win it.

A world of money grabbing scoundrels,
That's how this economy works,
They'll swipe your wallet out your pocket,
And leave you in the dirt.

It's absolutely ridiculous,
It's barmy, it's mad,
Everyone's obsessed with ten pound notes,
Designer clothes and fads.

No one thinks to change the way they're living,
No one wants to be free,
From the people with small minds,
And the rules of a society.

No one thinks about a friendly face,
That is worth more than credit cards,
Cause money won't pick you up,
When your life is in shards.

I can't seem to find a job,
But I don't think I care,
Cause I'm rich in family, Friends and laughter,
And for that there is no fare.
I.
Rhiannon Oct 2016
I.
I treated you nicely,
Bought you lovely things.
Like a brand new grand piano,
And a couple of diamond rings.

You told me that you liked me,
And everything was fine,
But then I found you kissing,
Their lips instead of mine.

You'd told me you were sorry,
Bought me some new flowers,
That's when I'd realised that money,
Was the reason you called this 'Ours'.

And I always found it funny,
Even from the start,
That no amount of money,
Could ever buy your heart.
I.
Rhiannon Nov 2016
I.
Listening to little lion man,
Half eaten bowl of Spaghetti to my right,
Half drunk mug of tea to my left.
I've waited five hours,
But you still haven't shown up.

You told me you'd be here at two,
But you forgot because you're scatterbrained.
I text you at four and asked if you were coming,
You said "yes", but I don't believe you.

Because I remember waiting up until two am,
But you never came home.
I'd get a brief text message that you're staying out,
Because you're always staying out.

I miss you, I always miss you.
I barely saw you for five years,
Then I got you for a few months,
But I took it for granted cause I'm a ******* idiot.

I miss you,
I've lost my appetite,
Just like you've lost interest.
But I still ******* miss you.
Rhiannon Mar 2016
I don't wear make up,
Because I've never wanted to.
I cannot walk in high heels,
Preferring my flat shoes.

You can keep your skinny jeans,
I'll have my lumberjacks on.
And I'd rather go play rugby,
Then to a stupid prom.

Whilst you're out there chasing boys,
I'm sat back reading books.
And you're crying over their rejection,
Well, I'm lost in the hook.

Call me "Frigid" if you must,
It's I just really couldn't care.
Whilst these boys do not control me,
They're driving you to despair.
Rhiannon Nov 2016
I will forever mourn you,
You and your plastic heart.
The fake ways of saying "I love you too",
As you tick another name off your chart.

I will forever forgive you,
The way I cursed your name,
For you too have an open mind,
And a heart that beats the same.

I will forever forgive you,
Because a grudge is a bad idea,
And my Mother tends to exaggerate things,
So she's ingrained my mind with fear.

What I have learned from your leaving,
Is to never trust others,
No matter if they're your greatest friend,
Sisters or Brothers.

We're a selfish race of humans,
And you've just about proved my point,
Because a Devil tricked my Mother,
But her children's hearts she did anoint.
Rhiannon Jun 2017
I recall the memories,
biting down ******* my thumb,
as you tried to hide your deceit with smiles,
to sugar-coat all you'd done.

But I have sensitive ears that listen,
and as you spoke I heard the venom drip,
from your tongue cascading onto the carpet,
as the rough fabric burned with a violent hiss.

Then the smell of the smoke that was poisonous,
as your acidic words swirled in the air,
you grinned wide showing all your rotten teeth,
decaying from the sweetener you'd placed there.
There are many pretty lies and ugly truths.
If.
Rhiannon Sep 2016
If.
If I tell you that I love you,
Would you run and hide?
Because I've said it in actions,
At least a hundred times.
Rhiannon Nov 2017
The feeling of your dissapointment was palpable,
I could taste it on my tongue like I hadn't brushed my teeth in days,
And feel it thick in the atmosphere,
Like heavy smoke from a forest fire.

The grey bags under my eyes did nothing but exclaim my insomnia,
When you told me that maybe I just wasn't going to bed at the right time.
And frustration swam round my bloodstream as I just couldn't get the right pitch to that song I alsways used to sing.

The melancholy rumble from my gut,
Reminded me that I was alone unless I had a full stomach,
My figure didn't matter,
Cause neither I, Let alone anyone else sexualised it.

(No one of my own age that is)

Sleep deprivation rushes round me like gale force winds from a tropic storm,
Lack of money burns holes in my pockets,
and wanderlust nags at my brain like overdue assignments from a College wreck,
Whilst everyones moaning infects me like a plague,
when I find stress spots crawling up my neck.

I am generation Z,
Generation nothing,
Generation give up,
Generation what the ****?
Generation, "Who the hell told you I could live like this?"

But I am privileged,
In a house,
But I am not me.

I am grieving.

I am grieving myself again.
Rhiannon Apr 2020
For love it is a wretched word,
It does not sit well in my mouth.
Opposed to me in twos and thirds,
Consumes my brain in doubt.

For it keeps lingering ominously,
I do feel it in my skull,
Stuck, jarring sounds, cacophony,
My mind remaining dull.

And harsh it is to feel the sting,
A wasp crawled up my arm,
What ebbing state, vile thing,
Light up my thoughts in alarm.

But you are seen more in light,
Than darkness is to say.
I clench my fists in noble fight,
But you will not go away.
Rhiannon Feb 2017
If emotions were physical things,
Mine would be a gaping wound.
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