It's kind of like when you want something sweet
And all there is are a bunch of old bitter hard candies
Sitting in your grandma's rusted bowl
On the coffee table in the dim living room and
That candy probably isn't there for eating but just for
Decoration or something,
So you pick one out anyway and it's not all that great
Even though that's exactly what you'd expect

But that little part of you said
"Maybe this won't be
another rock solid butterscotch chew"
Because you hoped this time would be different
But you thought wrong
And you'll probably end up eating another
Because it's
Better than nothing

Fat caterpillars that come in all different sizes;
As big as a canyon and as small as a needle, but
Eat everything that drinks cold water and has
a respiration cycle;
No matter if you are a strong sturdy tree or a weak dreary house fern
Dying in the living room corner because
The sunlight doesn't reach your browning leaves .
It is never known when you will be swallowed
And have the tips of your arms see the sunshine for their last time.
But don't grow and exist in fear of giant
Sour yellow and grass green bodies eating you alive
Instead aim to live your life on the surface
Of the sun where you might burn before they get you
And let your roots drink from the soil before it's all gone;
Because caterpillars too
Just want to be beautiful

We estimate a teen gets a ***** stuck up his or her **** every four seconds.
Vacuous air space remains in the ****** for some time afterwards.

Oh yeah. Up my ***. Up my ***. Up my ***. A lit candle–up my ***. A firecracker, a finger, a thumb–up my ***. An egg. A vibratin' egg. A scrambled egg.
Well, yeah, my *** may be big, but I don't recall a song ever being written about your flat one. Interesting!

It really does smell like something crawled up my *** and died.
It is even more disquieting to find mold growing, pink splotches – Are they from outerspace?

*** angel wings, like the kind they got in greeting cards and ****. float over to 'em, I'm floating, cause I'm dead.

Sometimes I can't decide if I like to wonder
Or if I like to know
Because I'm tired of these illusions
That are just there to confuse me
And sometimes I don't know what to believe
Or if I believe in anything
And I'm especially sick of that
Artificial, food coloring *******
Because your cupcakes aren't actually that blue
You just want them to match the tablecloth
And the waitress gave me Coke when I thought it was Pepsi
Because maybe that happens all the time
And she's tired of saying
"Is Coke okay?"

It's hard not to be sad when you are genuinely confused
About purpose and the meaning of every molecule,
And when all you can do is wonder.
It's hard to believe that your purpose
Is to have all of your questions answered  

Sometimes I wonder why I was given life;
Why does a parent bear a child?
For the obligatory manufactured satisfaction?
So on their death bed they can look back and say
"This is the mark I made on the world"?
What if your child is miserable? A **** up?
Were they doing you a favor
Or just being selfish?

It's like I gasp in the air as I finally reach the surface of the water
It's such a relief to be able to breathe again
If only just for a few minutes
When I'm drunk with laughter and
It doesn't really matter
That I should be suffocating or not,
Is it so wrong to breathe?

Because when we reach the stronghold in the end
We'll all be wondering why we didn't spend
Our time ******* in the air
And why we spent all that time
Blindly holding our precious breath

The salty sweat on my fingers make my eyes sting when I rub them
And the only things here for me are
Words from those in another realm
And a pile of soggy tissues on my bedroom floor
And I can't help staring at the blank ceiling
Feeling the touch of my pillow and wishing
That I was feeling the touch of your skin

The sky was a light red-orange
Like the diluted grapefruit juice next to your morning cereal
And as I breathe in the sticky air
It seems like this moment was created for me
As if the silence of the house
And the grim darkness of the outside
And the cool breeze entering from my outside window
All came together and said
"Let's come as one to make this
just for him and him alone"
Like when your friends throw you
A surprise birthday party
Or you get that Valentine's Day present you weren't expecting;
The feeling is surreal because you are very very very loved
So I thanked the trees and my pillow and the dreamy state of my consciousness  
And even the dog barking from the other side of the fence
and I say
"Thank you for
this beautiful gift"

Mitch McConnell could be the biggest ******* in American history.
Why don't you come oppress me, *****? I'm anti-fascism, you ******* *******! So, come on down and oppress me, big man. I dare you. Try to silence me, **** face!
I wish you would.
I personally DO NOT work retail. However *** breath , the people who do work retail and any non essential non-medical job deserve a holiday off with pay same as anyone else does just as president Lincoln declared in 1863
you unpatriotic ****** cattle ******* piece of uneducated ****.

If I posted what I actually wish for the ******* from Kentucky, I would hear a knock on my door and guys in blue suits with sun glasses.

He looks like a loaf of **** that is beginning to poke out of your *** prior to reaching a toilet.
That ***** can die in a well.

green on a mood ring means *****, so I say it to everyone with green.
young salmon are called pink

Pizza Express: Bull ring party disaster
I am not stopping learning every day and that makes me happy and comfortable.
Everything you ever wanted to know
I'm also worried because his not-really-girlfriend seems... controlling

no reason..get frusterated and extremely emotional...and can be a huge *****..i feel horrible
You know, in the "Ugh, I feel so fat in these jeans" vein of griping

Pretend the Hello Kitty truck and sumo wrestlers are here just for you
Seems like you had fun when you were drunk~
No, but seriously, we're living in an actual dream
there are reasons people aren't reading your blog posts.

It's better to live in agonizing mystery
Because only then you are actually living your own life and showing your style without hiding
yeah, let us die slowly in peace, you vulture

If we could
Slow down the clocks,
Maybe then
I wouldn't have
Motion sickness

Not happy

ur just a ignornat whtie ******* that needs to b bheaded wid a blunt knife.
White knight loser, Crawl back into the **** blossom that spawned u.

C'mere ya ******* piece of ****.
You love me for the fat on my chest why can't you love me for the fat on my stomach you *******.

**** suckin *******. I was right - take this: uuaah.

you've never been a bridesmaid is because people don't want a ***** as a friend
God's curse on *****'s *******.

Goodnight Moon, you albino m&m looking space-pebble garbage *******.

I ******* hate it when such sensitive topics are tarnished by *****.
Oprah, I've been trying to talk her into an interspecies relationship for months now.
White males rule the world. EDIT:No i am not a white male
I'm just going to be honest for a second.

Yes, I do have ***** envy this morning; I wish I were a bloke writing this because I'd have a better chance of people taking me seriously.

like how a male **** star once said someone stuck a chilli up his *** to keep his ******* going.

I'm basically a "good girl"...always have been, but sometimes I wish I was a ****.
Sometimes I wish I was a bird so i could fly over certain people and **** on their heads.

I wish I could somehow lose the ability to speak so that people would give up and leave me alone.
I wish I was a little kid again skinned knees are easier to fix than broken hearts.
or an octopus so I could slap 8 people at once.

I look at people screaming in ecstasy over a ******* football game, and sometimes wish I cared that much about stupid, simple things like that.
People don't laugh at the same things. Does that mean they differ in smartness?
Once you swallow the red pill, there is no going back.

like people dnt take me as i am they take mii like a joke

Ok first of all **** HURTS! Guess she did it b4 n maybe her experience was not very good, perhaps thats why she told u its gross n all.

Why did my crush open my snapchat and not reply?
My life is so huge I have to blog about it.

Why is there racism, ISIS, ****** slavery, massive killings, poverty? Why is life so hard?

its to krazii for people to understand ***