There is a light that comes from the telly,
Sometimes the moon shines in the night,
But not a flicker from the table,
No message pops up in the chat.
I wonder when the time is coming,
When does the blink mean less than that?
I circle back, afraid of something—
Not getting any, and yet getting some.

i stare into
your sapphire eyes,
communicating your true feelings
without truly
speaking.

they tell me everything i need to know,
what you really think.
about everyone,
the world,
about me.

...

i stare into
your sapphire eyes,
they stopped talking awhile ago.
you've gone completely
numb.

Another cycle come and gone
of invasive crap chewing out the inside of my skull
armor of stoicism, nagging need to atone
I could let you know, but i'll leave it alone

I am used to it now, just waiting it out
Sometimes it takes longer, sometimes the doubt is stronger
Nothing, really, that you've brought on
You'd know it if i showed you
Because you do it too

Nagging untrustworthy thoughts that come to you

You might wanna talk, if you do I will listen
And tell you what's real
or officious cognition
Might add to my burdens, i don't care
if it's hurtin'
If none of it's true, then there's nothing we're learnin'
I'll work it all out
And get rid of this doubt
Without forcing you to see the man behind the curtain

I've been here so much and I know how it works
It passes
And acknowledging it just makes it worse
Coerced into talking compromises my temperance
Your fortitude, will be all that's between a rock and a remanent

If it's working for you,
Then you don't need to worry about it

"Why do you treat me right?
talking late in the night
staring in your pretty eyes
you're so pretty, that I might
might pull up a fight
the stars above shine oh so bright
yet, I only see you far in sight
why?"

Explaining the me of me.
Always been detailed oriented
It’s who I am, it’s part of me.
I pound my chest
Try to get point across
Voice in earnest tone
I get offended
When accused
Of being defensive
My opinion,
On defense mechanism
Is that it is an
Explanation mechanism.
Defense goes up
When it seems
You won’t even listen
You say you hear
I say you do not hear, Hear
Rather, you turn your cheek
To my offering of just listen for once.

So, rather than
Defense accusations
Think in terms of my
Imparting to you who I am
My thoughts, my feelings.
I want you to know me
As I want to know you.

An idea, a conversation evolution
Open it to new possibilities.
Ask a question, make a statement
But…rather than answer initial
Point of subject
Go back, dig, become a reaper
What is reason the matter
Took spoken form?
Discover the prompt
Of initial point of discussion
And, talk about it.

Defending oneself
With defense mechanisms
Nor acccusations of defense
Is simply a dead end.
Why is it essential to
To send attack claiming
Defense, what is it in you
Cannot face?
Translating defense mechanisms
Into positive outcomes
By investigating the crux
Of the defense
By both individuals
Seems a more positive approach.
A defense of sorts on either side
Is just that,
Does not change a thing.

Just listen, rather than accuse.
Let me be heard
Just, please listen to hear, Hear.
I want me to be part
Of life’s prisms
To travel into the intricacies of being.
If not allowed to talk
To share my inner-most self
Staying locked in my self-prison
Is not where I want to be.

I'd rather
talk at you
of filth than
speak to you
like a man