all it took
was one sunny day,
together with whispers from the birds, saying that
it will come

and the asphalt under your shoes tells the same story,
the same as the trees, longing for cover
as well as the smiles of the long forgotten people
(and their happiness mesmerizes you)
and suddenly, even the snow with its final breath agrees
that ****, it is probably coming

And the conflict starts.

your heart that screams of drunkenness,
of wanting to burst, to be too **** high,
of being alive
crashes into your logic, your brain,
saying “but this is good too”
that this is the balance you need,
the safe, the expected.
the love.

but when you’ve been starved for the ups
the whole winter,
eating only cold, white life
it is hard to listen
and the colours of spring entices you,
making the black and white,
the sense,
draw its last breath
as you walk away into the spring
leaving all the beauty of winter
to thaw out,
leaving no trace
except for a constant reminder of the
cold parts in you that will never be warm