I grew up outside with the sun on my face
not indoors to the glow of a screen

I grew up acting and playing pretend  
not inside watching actors on a screen

I grew up going on walks with my friends and my dog
not alone texting friends through a screen

I grew up empowered by the skills I learned through play
not lost and behind because I stayed inside all day

stare at a blank white wall for hours
let it's emptiness consume you
then you'll understand
what it really means to feel blue

when you tell me what happened
my body fills with ice
the whole world freezes
dust falls like snow around the room swirling in slow motion
other people seem warm and happy indulging in an ignorant bliss
but the same room feels bitter cold
the ice cracks and my voice breaks
my eyes fills with hot tears
streaming down my face to melt my frozen mouth
the dam breaks as I gasp for air and begin to cry
I blink a few times and hang up the phone
the room suddenly feels too hot
and I begin to feel dizzy as time rapidly picks up

I'm being strangled by my bed
each fold so uncomfortable
wanting this restless night to end

I can feel all the hairs on my head knotting
as I try to claw my way to sleep
I can hear my brush plotting
from my bathroom sink

Each muscle cries out in irritation
the day's work holds it's grip
I sigh in fits of frustration
if only sleep I could skip

nights are longer for a nervous soul
counting hours until we wake
anxiety takes it's toll

Sunday's are gloomy
I don't want to leave my bed
knowing Monday's come

Art is dumb I hate it so much
It's why I don't sleep
I simply don't have the touch

Just kidding I like art a lot
because sometimes it's fun
it just takes too much thought

Back at square one
I hate art a lot

I asked you a question
you pretended not to hear
sometimes it feels as if you're far away
even if you're actually right here