I live for the days and dread the nights
It’s something about the quiet that brings out the light
My body is falling asleep, but not my mind
Do people know what that feels like?
People critique me as being an over thinker
Friends finding my habit annoying and concerning
They don’t get that it’s hard for me to control
My thoughts take over the entirety of my mind
They don’t get that my thoughts keep me lying awake at night
I pray to avoid temptation creeping into my way
But sometimes muffling the noise sounds like a luxury getaway
I’m not ready to face what lies underneath
But every night it’s getting much harder to breathe
My family doesn’t really believe in therapy
I don’t know what to do
I’m drowning, can someone please help me?

Long Island is not the place you want to be
When a pandemic outbreaks into the streets
Neighborhoods are split between those who listen to the CDC
And those who need a tragedy to take the guidelines seriously
Everyday is a guessing game of did Corona catch me today?
Lines outside clinics grew, nose swabs became a normal part of what we do
Masks became the latest fashion trend
Although there are people who refuse to buy them
More people are getting infected around me
When will people start to believe this isn’t just some made up fantasy?
Covid affects everyone who has it differently
I just hope no one dies around me.

I painted my room the hue of blue
For a reason
You see, blue reminds me of the beach
Which reminds me of hot summer days
And cold summer nights
Which reminds me of when you lent me your sweatshirt
Which wasn’t blue, but when I wore it I swear it radiated that hue
It’s scary having deep feelings for someone
But the radiance of blue was so vibrant
It was easy to push my fears aside
Instead I was filled with calmness, peace, security, and feelings of content  
I was left the happiest I’ve ever been in my life.
I painted my room the hue of blue
To remind me what I want to strive to feel
Each day of my life

Watching the clock go by
My hour with you is near
Feeling like an eternity
But soon you’ll be with me

You are more beautiful than the sunset
You are sweeter than a candy apple
An old soul, but a child at heart
I love you.

Love is so special
Just like a comet
You are my lucky star
That I will follow

If the burning light dies out
I will still look for you
Just like a shooting star
You may one day be gone

Darling, time only lasts so long
I have no doubt in my mind
That one day we’ll be together
Again, if life splits us apart

I will one day
Be reunited in your arms
Even if it’s in the stars
People will know where we are

Letting Go

I remember being in the dormitory hall,
I wept, pouring my heart out in front of you all
I didn’t know heartbreak would bring me to rock bottom
I had to call my dad to help me stand again
For tomorrow

I remember wondering what a year from then held
And luckily a year later I’m able to say
That I am doing well, but I’m still stuck in the past
Moving on seems like an impossible task

I went back to him, but we did not last.
I’m not ready to say goodbye, so I don’t.
Instead, I hold on,
Full of hope.

I know our time isn’t now,
It’s just so hard to put this down.

I think after some growing we could work
We could be happy and forget the hurt
The problem is he doesn’t see
That life will be okay with me

We view life very differently,
So he’s afraid of hurting me,
I’ve been through the pain once before
I want him to give us a chance
Before we officially close the door.

Sitting there, heart racing, time ticking,
You try to remember, but you just can't.
Everything you spent your night trying to memorize
Seems to be erased from memory,
Palms start sweating, hands start shaking,
You can’t make out the words typed
Boldly onto the paper,
Everything is becoming blurry,
You keep trying to replay last night
In your mind so you might
Be able to get a couple right,
But instead you are faced with only
Half a memory,
The answers are covered with blanks,
You can’t remember.
It is time to accept the destined fate.
A student’s living nightmare
Is not getting a passing grade.

It’s crazy,
Looking back on the time
Before you and me,
I was really happy then
But you changed me.

I was happy,
But I needed you.
Life would’ve looked different without you
I’m not sure if I would’ve made a good future wife without you

Happier ain’t always better
If it means you’re stuck in your ways
And not broadening your horizons,
I needed you.
To change my strong-willed ways

I was happy,
But I needed you.
Life would’ve looked different without you
I’m not sure if I would’ve made a good future wife without you.

I cried, a lot.
But what’s life without the hard stuff too,
You touched my heart,
That fact is true
It turns out, I needed you.

Happier ain’t always better
If it means you’re stuck in your ways
And not broadening your horizons.
I needed you.
To change my strong-willed ways.