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Mehtap Jan 2019
Laying down thinking of how not to think
Of you
Your faint irritating smirk in a cold curve
What to do
Your chewable lips only if I could have
A few
Bites? Kisses? Is it too much to ask tell me then
How to
Step on my heart freeze my feelings become
Anew
These dark brown eyes so soft yet deep coffee
Cold brew
Dark eyes are dark with sadness, secrets yet i
See through
Your eyes are meant to sleep soundly baby ill be
The one to
Drink up your darkness, carve your scars on me
Stay true
Let's lose sanity together get drunk in each other
Let's undo
These borders that are barely fighting our heavy breathing
Then redo
This prayer, again and again in an endless dream
Turning to
Reality, it's our first dance the only way I've learned
To carry through
Mehtap Nov 2018
Eyes
that know no religion , morals, nor mercy
Looked my way

Opened the cage of the little flapping bird in my chest and let it fly away

Bird keep it quite calm down
Hopefully I pray


Or love will rip you apart, burn you to ashes,eat your heart.
I make it stay

Oh bird, Her eyes are
spears, they're
Cold steel metal, don't bend, slow down, or waver .

Oh poor bird still singing hold yourself
apeice

Her eyes are
briers,
disguised as roses, claiming peace.

Peace left us for years now
this land is conceived with fear but it's knights are feirce

At times moans of torture

at times a sweet song of lust and Tease ,your love

All is fine when it doesn't reach your
Ears . I

was never one to surrender or lay back with ease. A rebel

stubborn rebel this little bird a beauty that leers.

My dear,
A bird will always sing.
A poem
That you shall never hear.
Mehtap Oct 2018
You remind me of my dark bitter coffee
Of the cigarette I smoke after a mental break down.
Inhale..... I love you.
Your love is like the burn I feel down my throught, between my ribs, in my lungs. Exhale.......... I watch clouds of grey disappear into nothingness and I close my eyes remembering your lips against mine, your gentle yet violent kisses ,your teasing attitude ,your wicked smile. Inhale......... I breath in deep wanting to feel the burn hard as if I was breathing you, And it hurts.
It hurts to love someone, it hurts to love you.
I try to remember when did I start feeling this way. When you whispers "stop biting your lips" as you squeezed my hand ? When I first talked to you? When i saw you walking down the hallway stroking your hair? Before that?.........
Exhale................. I part with the smoke slowly feeling the last burn out of my mouth.
Mehtap Oct 2018
That night she wanted to prove her beauty.
So she killed all light.
Letting only a dim-dip from the moon to reflect how she danced seductively in calm, bold waves, wearing her night black gown now
heading my way .
That night I felt her beauty with all names men had for senses and some god only knew existed.
The sea was always a possesive lover who's satisfied only when humidity consumed every inch of me,
Leaving my breath heavy, skin sticky with her water.
But that night, as if assured I'll be hers forever she pulled back
sending unapologetic rough wind that matched the loud waves still dancing beneath me.
I closed my eyes and layed down on her shore in complete surrender;
letting her wipe every memory of love before her.
"Wash me"I mouth loud enough only for her to hear.
Why was I touched before.
My brain became heavy with her smell that I kept ******* gulps of, and felt tears collect themselves in my eyes.
I discovered the happiness they kept bragging about in complete decoy.
If only they know what happiness felt like.
Ocasionally I'd peak at her to see endless folds of black and my heart runs fast with fear of its majesty.
She accepted what I am, enjoyed swallowing my dark thoughts into her even darker descending bottoms.
Her distance made it clear I was not to touch, only taste her.
For once I couldn't mind,
I threw the weight of my sorrow and passed into a state I still don't have synonyms for.
Her love made me complete,
I was ready to leave this life then and there with no regrets or a second look.
For everything would be tasteless after her
Mehtap Oct 2018
Drip drip drop
The sky cries.
Shades of greys and blues
Neutral flat a little bit sad
But true.

Like all the stories you hide
beneath faint soft yellow
But blue can only be covered with red


Drip drop drip drop drip drops
It gets faster and violent my child heart beats.

Rhyming with your giggles and pronunciation of what used to be my name
Now a soothing sound like the rain praying for longing souls

My god I pray **** that love in me

Drip drip drop
The melody slows down.
The pallete reveals a hint of blue
Will you show me some color too?

Perhaps it's time to leave.
I could never bear grey for long
It's becoming dull and gloomy this song

Drip drop
I wave goodbye until my lover returns
Prayers are answered, souls are rested.
Tears are sweet

— The End —