you see,

i'm not so good with words,
and cannot weave lines that rhyme,
or compose brilliant poems.


my words,

if only i could find them,
will tell you how much you're beautiful,
about your sweet smile, and your beautiful hair.


i can't wait,

for when we get to hold hands,
when i get to catwalk in your size 42 high heels,
go to a spanish club together, and reminisce why we don't talk about bruno.


i feel so lucky,

thinking about the randomness of how we met,
how you caught me in a way i'll always remember,
or maybe we really are meant to be together?


i always blush,

when i think about your sweet smiles and beautiful hair,
the standing girl emoji and the doll from squid game,
the too many times to count i stare at your beautiful pictures.

I didn't want you,
I wanted love
and I have realised
that they are not the same thing.

You were a mould
that I poured my insecurities in,
a computer I tried to program.

But you are a sky,
stormy and clear and rainy and warm.

You were so blue when I longed for red.

I didn't want you.
I wanted the thought.

Why do I feel like
the only actor
Among Y'all humans

Why do I feel like
the only sinner
Among y'all saints.

Why do I feel like
the only masked man
Among Y'all maskless.