I used to take of you
When I was younger
Even when you didn't
Take care of me

Now that I don't live there
We don't have the same roof
All of your words
Land like slaps across my face

How can you ask me
If I wanted this
With the same mouth
That says "I love you"

Love isn't a grieving heart
Or every single day hurting
More than the last
It stings deep in my heart

Every time I look at my phone
And you accuse me
Of all the things you did
I die a little inside

Because it isn't love
To treat me like this
To **** me, with all your words
And all your stupid lies

How can you call yourself a mother
When you are so damm childish
How can you say it's all on me
When the ball lies in your court

There is a cost
That we all must pay
But I refuse, with all that I am
To pay a penny for you

Because you don't give me time of day
You didn't give me any worth
Or even just a kind word
To bad lies are worth nothing

So all the of the hurt
That you push upon me
Just pushes me further away
And I won't come back

I would do anything
For my family, that you know
Blood is so much thicker than water
Maybe that's why you choked

But, I need it to stop
Because there is more to life
Than all this foolish drama
And all of my heartache

So please, close your mouth
Shut your tongue behind your teeth
And let me life all that is life
While I still have time

For today is sleeping
With all of the yesterdays
And tomorrows sun rises
Behind the whites of mine eyes

Add a dream to me and it will equal nothing
Except a depressed phsycomaniac  with beautiful eyes

I try to hide the trembling of my fingers
In the depth of my pockets
But they are to shallow

Like the water we walk in
I am still so unsure
Just as the tide is untamed
Each wave has a pull
To bring me under
Only to push me away
Just like the rest of the world

I know rejection for it is part of me
Some say that blood is thicker than water
I must insist though the contrary
That saltwater flows through my veins
What else to give me such a spirit

And still I try to hide
The tremble of my fingers
The cold of my heart pulls all warmth from my limbs
I am anxious and filled with sorrow Rather than the heat of a heart

You can be the angel this time
I'm done playing games

im.sorry
That this world you were brought into
So easily rejects you
It should not have been this way
Remember you are better than this
I love you

Self care is a gift
To your future self

I am a foolish one
To chase after things
That I am not even supposed to have
Things I only desire
Because they are withheld from me

The only thing that I really remember about love is the ache of how much it hurts when they take theirs back and leave you alone.

I die
Every day
To live
With you
Again

I give so much of myself to a world that asks for so little of me

We are so eager to **** ourselves just to be enough



...for a world that doesn't even deserve us

where I was born

where you made me
come
alive

where you
brought me
into life

into
light

to gaze in wonder
at the sun

but
I
would never fear
to be burned

by the heat of the day
or
to

sleep
eternally

in the cool of the night

I just want to stay awake
and see you make the light