Eventually

We all become believers
You will see

We all hit the gutters
And deceive
What we know
Into what we need

Feeding
On the hope
To cope
With the NO
Of every plea

Foiling
The gaping holes
While fruitlessly
Feathering dreams
Of ceasing
To be

Anywhere but there
Anywhere but here

Afraid and aware
Lying barren
On a hair

To everywhere
But where we want to be

Your everything
Believed in our belief
In our grieving
Of a meme

Obsolete and teething on a ***

Seething in seeing it
Unseamed
And undone
Unto nothing

Disconnected dots
Unlit

Breathing out
And away
From meaning

Slightly clinging
To the things
Believed
To Matter

Scattered over
The tattered matters
In meteor
Metaphors
Seeding
The other chapters

But not until after
Factoring in
The tractor beams
Of nothing

Just waiting

On the bottom
Of the gut
Crawling up
The throat lumps

And stuffing our luck

With all the succulent stuff
We are made of

Until eruptions
Of higher functions

Save us
From the ****

When enough
Is enough
And we just stop
Giving a ....

And let go

Blow after blow
Until we know
Who is in control

Of what is real
And what is
Made up

From atoms to the eave
Of our dreams
We must glean
What we need to

To get us through
These words
Of hurt
Out from lurking
In the work
Of our enemies

Forever tempting me
To blaspheme
In the wake

Of your passing

The endeavoring
Ever lasting
In careful mapping
Of the synapses
Collapsing
Into relief

Though brief

Locked in eternity
Oh the possibilities

My everything
And my humility

Locked in a single thought

In anxiety
Gone quietly

My hands before me

Steady

Always ready
Blanket me
In blank

Make me
Or break me

Take me

To forever

A nightly muse
Of thoughts diffuse
A thoughtless mind
With thoughts unkind,
A rhyme's plea
Beckoning to be,
A poet's mind
Her words unbind,
Far un sightly
Pained and slightly
Chaotic, inter-weaved
Labyrinthine and unseamed...
Her thoughts' stream,
A labored possession
Of loved recollections,
An urging tempt
To write unkempt
And sing untamed
Before the morrow
Bury thy sorrow,
In paper clean
Ink, ink blots
Joining scattered dots
Of unleashed thoughts
Across paper lays
Her scattered brain
All efforts vain
Seeming to be
Before trauma passes
Brought back sane
Weighing her losses
Weighing her gains
Poetic muse, that
Worded rather well
Like some stranger
She hath read
That signed below
Name familiar so
It dawned upon
This lady, wrong
Whenever did she
Write that song?
Which hers is
Now to call
'Tis dawn's dew
Awakening a new
Knowing of self
Last night's fire
Burned through those
Sheets of tire
Sudden smiles befriend
An unknowing visage
That must be
That must be
That is me
Spoke her mirage...

-Aayushi

there once was a time,
when her face was unlined.

her hands,unseamed
and uncalloused.

her eyes, bright and unclouded.

her *******, perky and full.

her back straight,
her stomach, tight and naturally, slightly concave.

and she had legs, that turned heads and a walk,
that created many,
a wolf whistle.

but then,

she had a life,

left her youth behind,

married,
badly, as time would tell.

had four children,
watched one die.

discovered,
she had married,
a selfish, gamblin man.

got a job
and then a second,
just, to feed her clan.

watched the love die.

then, watched him leave
with a resigned ,
yet  a relieved sigh.

raised,
two rambunctious boys
and a sickly, stubborn girl.

then, watched them leave.
launched them,
succesfully,
into the world...

now, the years,
have gone, bye the bye.

and with,aching back and teary eyes, she shuffles on
toward her demise.

with the memory of
times long gone,

and the echoes
of wolf-whistling guys,
legs long and lean
and her unlined face
with, eye catching smile.
giving her a sense of
inner grace....
that plays upon
her lined and crumpled face.

as she relives her youth
in her memories
as she finds that wonderous place, when once she was young.....and oh so beautiful.

I dream of delirious shadows and frantic,
whispering light.
in the doom of an hour my bones
are opened to the sky.
rise from me, mortal pilot.

eyes unseamed to the foot of
a pillar of fire in the void,
screaming truths,
becoming.
vaporize and depart.

adrift in the hysteria of one second,
a rapidly receding horizon.
awash in a thunderous confluence,
mind rent.
I am clay,
transmuted.