Her hands are rusty as she grasps the sheet;
A forbidden silk engulfed in deepened red.
Too weak to scream but strong enough to
Prevail in her own demise.
She lifts and waves it across a luring eye,
Calling the beast to the feast that is her,
Offered up on a platter of cheap,
Used and battered silver.
His tide withdraws out for miles,
Revealing the secret caves and
The truths behind the closed shades
Of her twelve year old bedroom.
Polluted sands reign beneath the pure
Blue hue of her ocean eyes.
Collections of every small droplet of water
In the air of her past combine together
Into a perfidious blurred cloud of blackened oil,
Consuming her into a sick dishonest truth.
She only knows how to be charged by bulls,
In a ring where there is no audience,
But rather a sea of people with their backs turned.
Thumping, trotting, galloping feet on the ground,
The sound of horns penetrating into skin,
A small whisper of soft, unwarranted apologies,
Like a tree’s remorse for the man with the axe,
As he stabs the wise oak in the middle of the forest.
If every set of selfish eyes ignores her cries for help,
Is the horned villain even hurting her at all?
Her feet dig into the earth like a cemented foundation,
As she swears to rise with every fatal blow,
Until the day a head slowly turns,
And ends the torcherous show.

A poetic speech.
A conspicuous outplay.
Why oh why, do I let
The scars hide inside?

These memories which lay before me,
Grant surrender to the torcherous
Force of thoughts stampeding through my mind.

Questions arise in times of dark skies,
While the sorcery which has ingrained
My personality spreads like wildfire.

With arms wide open,
I invite remembrance of the truth.

I bask in horror
And forget pleasantries.
I've banished my heart
And removed intimacy.

I've embraced the fact
That I've convinced myself
To enjoy the push of wrought vengeance
Directed towards the decrepit foundation of my existence,
All the while being too fearful
To follow through with the pull
Of positive and constructive actions
Towards a dream in which I blend with the day.

I contend with my own weighted soul
And offer no resistance
As I gently fall infinitely deeper
Into an abyss of forgetfulness.

I want to be somebody,
But I don't know who to be.

I just flew the blue bird, chained like a bandit out of hell.
feelin' awfully down but there ain't a soul to tell.
My lady love she left this place, went belly up and blue.
she's a goner with the castaways, what a useless way to loose.
She was a torcherous deceiver born from burning waste.
like a feather in the gutter, she floated down my way.
I knew it was all bad, could smell the trouble on her kiss.
But there I was, lookin' for more, as that serpent gave a hiss.
Couldn't no wild horse or the hounds of hell drag me.
From ridin' those ol' rails of love, her and I were meant to be.
We set out searching for our paradise on them icy seas.
But got lost among the poppy fields, higher than redwood trees.
We drifted on, and danced along, a riddler she became.
that crazy night under diamond light, in the green gorge, our love was made.
I doubled down, and paid the price, but nothing with us changed
This I'm sure you know, my friend, no one wins this game.
I knew this to be true, and did slip and slide away.
Gone along while the song birds sang, and dawn became the day.
But she didn't see that mornings glory falling with the dew.
She had already came and went, belly up and blue.

Throat is sore
Glands are up
Banging head
Down on my luck

Confined to my bed
But too hot to sleep
Missing the air con
But for work I’m too weak

Swimming in
My own sweat
Stuck to the sheets
Which are wringing wet

Like a water bed
Or rather a paddling pool
My mattress has become la mer
But it’s stifling as oppose to cool

Life in the attic
Is an arduous affair
Sub Siberian in winter
Sweltering in summer sans any air

Oh, bring me an oscillating fan!
To waft me as I ail
In silver or white but definitely not black
Coordination with decor must prevail

I scour Argos
and Amazon online
But the fans are so plentiful
I cannot decide

Which one to order
And can they deliver?
Oh f**k, they’ve sold out
That’ll teach me to dither!

I’ll take a cold shower
If I can muster up the strength
To stand up for long enough
To get myself drenched

Nay, I’m too frail
At least at the minute
Thus my sweat sodden bed
Retains me in it

If I could just sleep awhile
Replenish my energy
Of this BO ridden pit
Could I at last be free

But this lurgey with which I’m afflicted
Coupled with the heat
Is keeping me awake
Sedate me, oh somebody, please!

I shouldn’t complain
It’s nice to have sun
But being broiled alive
Isn’t very much fun

Thus with the lobster
I utterly empathise
So torcherous and barbaric
A way to meet one’s demise

Fortunately I’m not a crustacean
Forcibly yanked by a net from the sea
I’m merely a girl with a viral complaint
Not viewed as a delicacy

Thus I should quit whining
And focus on being ill
For my head in the freezer could I stick
And with the frozen peas chill.