cinderella looked out of a tiny window covered with steele bars. the sun brightly shining through, the sky a beautiful pinkish purple. she wondered if she would ever feel the warmth of the sunlight again as she touched the window. she looked down at what used to be a gorgeous blue gown, now tattered and toarn. she touched the fabric softly remembering how her eyes shined when she first saw it. & the struggle that ruined it. her eyes began to swell up with tears. ¨i cant take this much more¨ she thought. ¨i wont...¨ she decided, her sad eyes and broken heart now filled with rage and hostility. her shaking hands now clinched in fists. ¨i will be just as mad, limitless, and unhumane as he is. i will be decieving, cold and cruel. and i won't feel anything about it. ill treat him like a doormat instead of a person just like he treated me. the only difference will be that i will not allow him to live.¨

¨we will see who is dim witted.¨

i took a handfull of pills one day
hoping i would fly away,
and see jesus face to face,
escaping this god forsaken place.
i thought that it would set me free,
from being a living tragedy.
but i began to feel very sick.
i felt as if i had been hit in the head with a brick.
my stomache turned, and i began to cry.
i never really wanted to die. but now im gone.
and im never coming back.
daddys at my funeral, all toarn up and dressed in black. 
mom is busy crying, she would give the world, anything to get back her dear baby girl.
and i rot away, and all of my hopes anddreams they do too..., because i made a big mistake, thatno one could undo.
all of the plans that god had made for me, tragicly erased.all of my potential, has now gone to waste.
i never really wanted to die, i just wanted to end this pain, i guess that i thought that life, was nothing but a game.

this fear, this hurt, it over powers me, it devours me, baby.
tell me that it's all not just a waste, that i'm the only one who
holds your heart, that i can't be replaced.

tonight i'll get high, & fly out into outerspace,
trying to erase all of your mistakes.

i'm breaking down again, & where are you?
i can't trust a single word you say,
are you falling for someone new?
& what will take this pain away?

i sew my mouth shut, troubled by all of these unspoken
words, all of these questions without anwsers, eating me
alive like cancer. just be honest & real, is it really that hard
of a task?, because i'm so toarn by all of these questions,
that i shouldn't feel the need to ask.

just tell me that you're the anwser.

that gleam in your eyes, makes me terrified,
what lyes beneath them?, & how much do you hide?
oh how i love those eyes, but have they left mine blind?
because of all of these anwsers that i can't find, to the
questions that take away my piece of mind?

it is her, who makes me an insecure monster,
should i just give up & let go? because i'm so
restless & unsure, it's torture, so if it's too laight,
please just let me know.

if i die and do not wake, please know that i nolonger ache,
a problem child, your biggest mistake, fading away with every
breath i take, i am unheard scream, a broken dream, nothing is
alright, and no one is ever quite what they seem. what do you see?
when you look at me? i'm so twisted and toarn from fighting
this war, now i'm alone and theres nobody home, i've got nothing
left to fight for. for i am so broken, by the path that i've chosen,
these wounds have gotten far too deep... so now i'm just hoping that my eyes will never open, every time i go to sleep.