it's summer. the beginning of july to be exact. my mom and i have finally arrived in north carolina for the highlight of my year: summer camp (or as i lovingly call it: nerd camp). i, for some idiotic reason, am wearing maroon sweatpants, a black tank top, black combat boot heels, and a polka dot blanket. why i'm wearing the blanket in the sweltering heat remains a mystery to me as well. i'm dragging my obnoxious, oversized suitcases behind me as the counselors try their hardest not to stare. i know i've definitely overpacked for only a three week stay, but better safe than sorry right? i see the magnificent front doors and a smile graces my lips. i'm finally here. back where i can fully be myself unapologetically. it's as i start lugging my bags up the pathway when the doors open and out you come. oh, how glad i am to see you. our eyes meet and instantly our slight smiles are turned into blinding grins. i drop my bags, my blanket, forget everything and run towards you as you run towards me. we meet in the middle of the path in a bone crushing hug that can hardly express how much we've missed each other. i know we're causing a scene but i really just can't bring myself to care. after a year apart, we're finally reunited, even if only for a meager three weeks. i fully intend to spend as much time as humanly possible with you over the next twenty one days, no matter how annoyed you may get of me. i know i'm a handful but that's one of the reasons you love me, isn't it? it's hard to believe that we only met a year ago, only a hundred or so feet away from where we stand now. the bond that's formed between us feels like we've known each other a lifetime at least. as we hug and you spin me around and everyone stares, i let out a bubbly laugh. i am happy. i'm filled with pure joy and nothing else. for the first time in so long, i don't think about what can go wrong, how we'll have to leave each other again soon, how recently i'd been feeling like life wasn't worth living. i think only of how happy i am to finally have your arms wrapped around me again and how just being near you makes me feel like everything will be okay. i don't know how you do it but you cause me so much joy that it's all i can feel. in my mind, i make a note. this. this is what pure happiness feels like. and if i'm able to feel it now, i know i'll be able to feel it again. so with that joy comes hope. this is only the second time i've ever felt pure happiness in my life but i know there's more to come. this is only part ii of a neverending series. it may take a while for the pieces to come out at first but i know they'll come easier and easier as i go on. and so i hold on. thinking of happiness pt i. thinking of happiness pt ii. thinking of happiness pt ∞.

I rest my head on the window and watch
overhead electrical wires dance.
My overpacked bag nestles between my ankles
while the window's vibrations massage my scalp
into a tranquil numbness.

For a moment, my thoughts exist in an uncommon serenity
in which they follow only the oscillating dance of the wires above

Merge and then separate
Merge…separate

I find calm
seeing the world
as a singular continuous blur
passing me by.
It makes more sense
than any destination.

And the view from this train window defines life
beautifully, in a manner ever so concise.

“A constant journey between destinations with imprecise vision in between”