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"limey" poems
They've been working on this for years Inside the government To try a replace the brain of man With that of a purple eggplant This idea to me sounds genius If you know what it is that I mean People round here might start making sense Pass the veggies if you please They called all the top notched scientists And vegetarians throughout the land To see what would be the best variety In this eggplant transplant experiment They settled on the aubergine Great Brittan's joy and pride When it comes to the perfect eggplant Those Limey's will not be denied They were afraid if they went to the private sector That person would surely be missed So they grabbed someone unsuspecting Inside of the government They told the low level employee A bit of truth mixed with a little white lie They needed him for his vast understanding and knowledge Plus they'd be serving cookies on the side They added a little something to the cookie dough That knocked the governmental genius to his knees Plopped him down on the gurney ...Let the experiment proceed if you please They cracked his skull wide open Where upon they couldn't believe their eyes Right there inside of his cranium Already an eggplant did reside
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Jul 12, 2013
Jul 12, 2013 at 4:34 PM UTC
Eggplant Transplant Experiment
touch bumpy sandpaper ridged crusty sight half moon shape yellow green purple taste lemony cherryee limey purpley smell good like sugar up my nose like lemons like cherry sound crunch squish crackle crackle yum yum
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Oct 16, 2014
Oct 16, 2014 at 4:32 PM UTC
the watermelon
A pregnant lass with eyes of glass has never learned to cope. Once set adrift her fall was swift, she slid a slipp’ry slope - She casts the Curse, the Holy Verse, and shoots a shot of dope, And stalks discreet Asylum Street her daily horoscope - The stray was struck by random truck which was her only hope. Well, Banjo Boy, with little joy, he strums her life entire: “The wayward waif was never safe; her stars were dark and dire. Born midst the rues and avenues where lack and want aspire Where no one heeds the childish needs that little ones require; Where faith survives in tempest lives, a swirl within the briar, Infinity grinds as time unwinds, until the winds expire. Her last caprice? The final peace that no one could deny her - Whipped by the flood, stray beads of blood are spattered on the spire; Though beads of sweat are cool and wet, cold clotted blood is dryer.” Though broken there, she’s fled the snare with dying thoughts serene. And now she’s dead, the rumours spread:  “her age? a sweet 16, With child, ***** her soul dyed red, her body so unclean.” A place is sought where she can rot, avoiding churchyard scenes, In limey pits, as well befits, behind forbidding screens; And all the while a dirge is styled on tattered tambourines Which echo through the human zoo in valleys of the Queens. Without rejoice, in hissing voice, near soil that’s seldom trod “In pious role, God bless my soul”, was mouthed with mitred nod, Neath scarlet trim with black, and grim, behind a robed facade - “She’ll burn in hell and sulphur smell”, spat Priest and man of god. Well, angels sweet with cloven feet, they sing in girl’s attire, But Banjo Boy, he’s playing coy while chanting in the choir: “The clueless search within the church to find what they desire - Beyond the nave, a gravelled grave, the final Rectifier” And when he’s through, without ado, he stacks some stones nearby her.
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May 31, 2013
May 31, 2013 at 8:07 AM UTC
A Pregnant Lass
A pregnant lass with eyes of glass has never learned to cope. Once set adrift her fall was swift, she slid a slipp’ry slope - She casts the Curse, the Holy Verse, and shoots a shot of dope, And stalks discreet Asylum Street her daily horoscope - The stray was struck by random truck which was her only hope. Well, Banjo Boy, with little joy, he strums her life entire: “The wayward waif was never safe; her stars were dark and dire. Born midst the rues and avenues where lack and want aspire Where no one heeds the childish needs that little ones require; Where faith survives in tempest lives, a swirl within the briar, Infinity grinds as time unwinds, until the winds expire. Her last caprice? The final peace that no one could deny her - Whipped by the flood, stray beads of blood are spattered on the spire; Though beads of sweat are cool and wet, cold clotted blood is dryer.” Though broken there, she’s fled the snare with dying thoughts serene. And now she’s dead, the rumours spread:  “her age? a sweet 16, With child, ***** her soul dyed red, her body so unclean.” A place is sought where she can rot, avoiding churchyard scenes, In limey pits, as well befits, behind forbidding screens; And all the while a dirge is styled on tattered tambourines Which echo through the human zoo in valleys of the Queens. Without rejoice, in hissing voice, near soil that’s seldom trod “In pious role, God bless my soul”, was mouthed with mitred nod, Neath scarlet trim with black, and grim, behind a robed facade - “She’ll burn in hell and sulphur smell”, spat Priest and man of god. Well, angels sweet with cloven feet, they sing in girl’s attire, But Banjo Boy, he’s playing coy while chanting in the choir: “The clueless search within the church to find what they desire - Beyond the nave, a gravelled grave, the final Rectifier” And when he’s through, without ado, he stacks some stones nearby her.
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Time or the essance of Death distilled. No matter the who - Someone , some force snowballed. The greatest daylight robbery - that of our TIME. TIME. is not money "At least in my books" -me.
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Sep 14, 2013
Sep 14, 2013 at 5:44 PM UTC
Timey Limey Easy Squeezy Lemon Peasy
Oh tell me where has England's glory gone, Lost golden days of beef and lukewarm beer? Now it's polenta in a gastro-pub, Chilean Chardonnay, Tequila Slammers. Her Empire proudly pink on schoolroom maps; India, Afric, source of plundered loot galore. All gone, all gone, black faces back in charge And black drug pushers stalk old London's streets. Fat huntsmen dressed in pink, all banished now, Their yelping foxhounds ripping prey apart, Celebrating sick English country ways Before returning to their mortgaged homes. City yobbos yelling down their mobiles, Fatcats slurping up their creamy profits; All the public cares about is football And the *** lives of the media's darlings. So where has England's honour gone today? Up the American military **** Our government showing its smug disdain For what decent people care and think. We've sold out to baseball caps and burgers, And imported TV shows for the mentally ******** A visitor attraction for obese rich yanks to drawl "We're real glad we saved these Limey's ***** in two wars".
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Nov 19, 2014
Nov 19, 2014 at 6:08 AM UTC
A Lament for Olde England
"This" Your skin - my skin - and 3,000 miles of our own glorious sin. It's my fault, blame it all on me, because I avoid my fear for more of your, yum yum yum. And I need to take more: I want to kiss your heart, it endures our passion, our lust, our art. Together, 1 on 1, so undone, and I allow you to see my light, so limey bright. We've created our own coating of sensational torment - and I want to only breath your smell. Sweat trickling down your pleasure trail - in the heat of the night - I will lick in delight. My ultimate pleasure, my illumination. You are radiance, you set my soul alight. I want to kiss your heart, it stumbles in my art. What we are, what we are, drift what may, my radiant star....
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Dec 14, 2012
Dec 14, 2012 at 8:01 PM UTC
"This."
The average worker can work for 15 hours A man can provide for his children a meal a day Children lose the ability to educate themselves Once they start work, a stated routine, a stated marriage They are someone else's property Man is the only creature, that let's their fathers die in the jungle And their mother die in someone's arms Man is the only creature, that can tan-hide his brother But, there is a stated routine for the brothers For the brothers need to be bred for work Like milked cattle on milch barns All standing in long lines waiting for the next mile of grass Man can **** man over some grass and coke By grass I mean land By coke I mean a limey drink for 20 cents I guess men could be better without their possessions Imagine it without the drugs or bummed smokes Imagine life without the movie stars and all the signs There is a stated routine in how we keep buying Putting our mattress kings to sleep on cushioned beds While our workers eat the pavement and dirt every fine day Like I said man can **** man, over money and love How ironic that money buys love.
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Jul 4, 2020
Jul 4, 2020 at 2:56 PM UTC
A stated routine
He's just fiction for now but soon he'll be springing to his feet bouncing off my Apple screen... leaping from my Final Draft program, and -- he'll start to scream his dialogue at me...                                  (PROTAGONIST) ****** hell barefoot Mary Joseph n' John what n' the limey beans took you so long---- What?! All to give me a **** voice?! You haven't even given me a choice - mate! Come on...come on..hurry up we've got one heck of a writing date! I've been locked up in here - like forever--- all up inside your brain... while you were...What?! trying to come up with a title n' What?! My **** name!" I'll have to answer him...                                      (ME) "I know, I know -- I'm slow... it's just this whole time                    (a beat) I was carefully crafting your backstory I wanted to give some obstacles give you some powers n' incredible force so you'd have a way to chart your course... then rise like Hercules or Thor - you know to give you some kind of wonderful glory I wanted to give you a fantastic story!" I was... In Search of ________All of The Above Last but not least... I wanted you to fall in Love."                                  (PROTAGONIST) Is that why you've got me all dressed up like I'm going to ****** church? Man, these shoes make me feel like Lurch...                                 (ME) Wait! Did I just hear you say feel?                                 (PROTAGONIST) Yeah, like -- duh! Don't you know .... you've just made me real?
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Dec 2, 2014
Dec 2, 2014 at 9:18 PM UTC
In Search Of_____All Of The Above
He's just fiction for now but soon he'll be springing to his feet bouncing off my Apple screen... leaping from my Final Draft program, and -- he'll start to scream his dialogue at me...                                  (PROTAGONIST) ****** hell barefoot Mary Joseph n' John what n' the limey beans took you so long---- What?! All to give me a **** voice?! You haven't even given me a choice - mate! Come on...come on..hurry up we've got one heck of a writing date! I've been locked up in here - like forever--- all up inside your brain... while you were...What?! trying to come up with a title n' What?! My **** name!" I'll have to answer him...                                      (ME) "I know, I know -- I'm slow... it's just this whole time                    (a beat) I was carefully crafting your backstory I wanted to give some obstacles give you some powers n' incredible force so you'd have a way to chart your course... then rise like Hercules or Thor - you know to give you some kind of wonderful glory I wanted to give you a fantastic story!" I was... In Search of ________All of The Above Last but not least... I wanted you to fall in Love."                                  (PROTAGONIST) Is that why you've got me all dressed up like I'm going to ****** church? Man, these shoes make me feel like Lurch...                                 (ME) Wait! Did I just hear you say feel?                                 (PROTAGONIST) Yeah, like -- duh! Don't you know .... you've just made me real?
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