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"illudes" poems
Roads stretch for miles, The city lights seem lonely and 27 like an ominous number I search my head for answers, Though thoughts about age and time seem pointless I wonder what the stars think of their mortality, Does it also seem like a short time? Is someone also stealing their time? Does it feel like a rush? Do they also feel small? Can their gigantic heat generate as much joy as it illudes us to? There is no point in wondering Yet wondering puts my mind to ease... ....I wonder why
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Jan 20, 2024
Jan 20, 2024 at 7:57 PM UTC
Wondering first-thought
let me tell you a story. one time something convinced me that i was not beautiful. it was society it was anxiety it was the others and the i. then i took a sage trip on a spaceship, i sat inside myself the real myself, and felt the warmth of the core of the earth, i felt the power surge down the roots of my feet, i felt the light at the center of me and it was connected, somehow inseparable, from the sun and the moon and the other stars. now that i have felt this, the "size" you speak of illudes me. what is it? a warp in space time, a measure of gravity? how huge are you, really? a dot inside a planet inside a galaxy inside a universe. what do you really feel when you have so few clothes on? irrationality that can be turned into freedom within an attosecond infinitysecond. what do you really feel when you have so few clothes on? listen to the wise wolf woman inside you.
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Dec 10, 2012
Dec 10, 2012 at 4:49 AM UTC
response to a question on tumblr
Temporarily tortured realationship, I thought I found where I fit in. But she been promised to a guy before me, Try all I like I can't win. Trapped inside a ditch, With only a shovel to get out. I'll dig for days on end, If I could only escape all this doubt. I recall throwing myself down here, But not the reason why. The love I sought illudes me, Can I just let it die?
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Dec 4, 2012
Dec 4, 2012 at 6:44 AM UTC
Trapped By Longing
I can feel my halo Dimming I can feel my tolerance Slimming I can feel my sanity rot in this Forever stagnant state I'm Sitting I can feel the madness Ripping Holes of confusion in my Heart I can feel the courage crawl to Fool me alone in the Dark But where the **** am I? Search for shadows in the light So easily could I just hate But I suppress what none dare take Let the tears soften the break Coping illudes as release I pray for the real fall I pray to end it all They say to get it off my chest Let my burdens find some rest But I take comfort in the hope One day my cares will ******* Choke I could feel you spitting every Insolent complaint Hammering like nails in my Tolerance I swallow hard Push down impulsiveness Caution can be a burden Praised as wisdom's yoke Yet, so can capriciousness So I sit back and choke So where the **** am I? Anxiety is too **** high So easily could I just break But an act of risk The fence won't take Just sit there and Equivocate Coping illudes as release I pray for the real fall I pray to end it all They say to get it off my chest Let my burdens find some rest But I take comfort in the hope One day my cares will ******* Choke Sitting pretty on the fence Next to indecisiveness And he tells me "Here, there is no right or wrong. In the grey is where you belong." So I look to either side and They're all living their lives Doing what they feel is right until they die And here I am alone Wasting away as I Erode And I realize I'll never live at all. So who the **** am I? Risk is the breath of life So easily could I just wait Second guess and hesitate But there's no freedom in a place Where coping illudes as release
0
Aug 6, 2017
Aug 6, 2017 at 2:09 AM UTC
Choke
I can feel my halo Dimming I can feel my tolerance Slimming I can feel my sanity rot in this Forever stagnant state I'm Sitting I can feel the madness Ripping Holes of confusion in my Heart I can feel the courage crawl to Fool me alone in the Dark But where the **** am I? Search for shadows in the light So easily could I just hate But I suppress what none dare take Let the tears soften the break Coping illudes as release I pray for the real fall I pray to end it all They say to get it off my chest Let my burdens find some rest But I take comfort in the hope One day my cares will ******* Choke I could feel you spitting every Insolent complaint Hammering like nails in my Tolerance I swallow hard Push down impulsiveness Caution can be a burden Praised as wisdom's yoke Yet, so can capriciousness So I sit back and choke So where the **** am I? Anxiety is too **** high So easily could I just break But an act of risk The fence won't take Just sit there and Equivocate Coping illudes as release I pray for the real fall I pray to end it all They say to get it off my chest Let my burdens find some rest But I take comfort in the hope One day my cares will ******* Choke Sitting pretty on the fence Next to indecisiveness And he tells me "Here, there is no right or wrong. In the grey is where you belong." So I look to either side and They're all living their lives Doing what they feel is right until they die And here I am alone Wasting away as I Erode And I realize I'll never live at all. So who the **** am I? Risk is the breath of life So easily could I just wait Second guess and hesitate But there's no freedom in a place Where coping illudes as release
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