"gapeseed" poems
When was I shot?
Do I have to rot?
Oh, who do I blame?
For that gnarly flint that came..
The arrow of that little cupid,
got me clear and lucid.
You widened my pupils.
Messed up all my scruples.
Oh god, I have no more doubt.
Nothing left to think about.
I got water on my drought,
I let my flower rise and sprout.
You sit there and you shine.
I got vibes all along my spine.
I can feel nothing of mine,
You make me gaze, make me pine.
I’m not in my maze, I’m just fine.
I got an itch, that requires a stitch.
I’m out of the ditch, but I won’t twitch
You knocked me all the way down.
With your eyes, hazely brown.
Your smile melts me down.
Black hair, black gown,
made of the night sky’s lonely frown.
How do I not look?
There’s no letting of the hook.
I’m going to put it in my book,
oh, my eyes you shook, you took.
I gotta grab on tight,
on your bright blinding light,
stand in your sight, be on your side.
And just might,
Everything’ll be allright.
You got me mesmerized,
My senses vaporized.
Like a gapeseed I stare,
oh, how do I dare?
You widened my eye,
oh no, I do not lie.
Feb 13, 2015
Feb 13, 2015 at 7:07 PM UTC
Everybody does it.
I could never dream
Without wondering what someone else was dreaming.
I cannot speak
Without hesitating at another's thoughts.
You ask me what I'm afraid of.
Maybe it is
Bullies,
Offenders,
Liars.
Maybe I'm afraid I'm seen that way.
Maybe I'm afraid of what they say,
What they'll do,
What it will mean.
As to my fears escalating,
I'm more convinced
The world is a better place when I hide in my room.
Their opinions will change the world.
I don't want to be changed.
I don't want to be told
Or to be scoffed at.
I fear
Judgment.
Jul 31, 2014
Jul 31, 2014 at 1:52 PM UTC
A ten and some change
On the bureau,
Tomorrow's haircut or bad choice.
And she's in one of those moods
On about how she has to be up by noon.
I've been trying to change
Somethings about me,
How I'm staying up late
And making you think I'm too dependent.
Well, I guess I've always been a gapeseed
It's part of the reason my father and I don't speak
And I can tell when I've become a burden,
It's like a sick sixth-sense I was birthed with
Feb 7, 2015
Feb 7, 2015 at 2:07 AM UTC
Stuck in between the
cold white
Blank
Corridors
that gapeseed
Back at me.
The echoes
Of the red arm
Audibly ticking seconds away
A reminder
Time is in motion,
Just like my thoughts
When boredom is my notion.
Nov 7, 2014
Nov 7, 2014 at 6:22 AM UTC
In a snap,
Cast to the skies
A quarter in revelations
It hangs for a moment,
To ascend
And succumb to the odds
The time I cried
And thew my cards
Across the floor
The time I smiled
And thanked you
For the patients it takes
Naked frustration is
A landscape of voices,
Begging you to be what you are
But all that reflects
Is tethered to uncertainty
Potential is awash
In the twinkling moments
Of genius perceived, but wasted
As the nights that begot them
The celebratory hours
Seemed to forecast
Less ordinary futures
But the paper thin,
Angry kid
Always clawing for scraps
He couldn’t have enough
Curious and cautious
A gapeseed for the impractical
If I could latch to one thing
To make that my master
If I could commit
If I could break the paralysis
That hinders even my words
If I could give a ****
Then it wouldn’t be so unsettling
To watch the quarter drop
And not contend with the difference
Aug 11, 2017
Aug 11, 2017 at 4:03 PM UTC