I cried too much
but was it enough
I can't run
hiding the turth to all
I must be done
crying pain of blooding tears
the sickness I have
will never heal the scars
the discoloration of my life
will never show
depressed in my only feels
doleful face
that I try not
to have any motion
so long to being successful
strain to pains holing might
I will never win the fight
I cried so many tears through life
can't say sorrow will come
I can say no elated this will some
Cried enough, done

I be the captain of this scurvy crew
We sail under the blue moon
Guided by black skies
The stars gave out on us long ago
Hearts cold
You can see the pain in our eyes
Not from the lack of *****
But the lack of treasure
We were told
It's better to loved and lost than never loved at all
Well we've loved and lost
Never to love again
So casted out to the seas
Bath with the Dolphins
To get rid of these fleas
The clean shaven looked lost in the waves
Crows feet eyes match the crow at my side
Picking the blooding ******* insect
From the crew
I remember the draining feel with you
The lack of civilization has dulled our eyes
Change the interpretation of words
Just blank stares and grunts
We've been drifting for months
But still the flashes of past memories haunts them
They relapse wanting love
So a plank I've built
Threaten them with it
Like a sword on my hilt
But the feeling of love was to great
Soon they staged a coup d'état
Set the ship on fire
And took shelter in the sea
All except me
As the black flags fall in flames around me
The captain and his ship both meet the sea

chained up on a visceral boomerang to your apathy -
disembody, then shrivel back into my chest.
infested with a vile peanut gallery
snickering in the belly of my ears.
cursed with an over-active mental ***** reflex,
born with the habit of re-ingesting bile and lies.
gag-order on the heart so it doesn't whip me
with it's crown of thorns
twisted from plucking the horns of dead roses.
he loves me, he has no room for me,
beyond the tip-tap of trembling bones upon his shoulder.
i've trimmed myself down with neglect,
i've perfected the presentation of deception
as a romantic encounter,
monotonous plunging of doubt across layers of skin.
carouseling a patch-worked mantra of ambivalence,
motion sickness riding on my collarbone dressed with a grin
heaving and green.
i caught whiplash from sneaking glances at you
while creating the illusion
that i was forever turning away -
always leaving, always shaking out a no,
always building up a wax paper wall
(always clumsy, always patching holes with cotton).
i'm wasting away on the offerings you drop at the pit of my stomach:
all lead anvils and hurricanes.
i wish i could carve out the part of me that thinks of you,
drown it in cyanide, and mock it's funeral with fireworks.
i am toddler-tantrum-flinging my limbs wild at the sky,
eyes pinched shut, and teeth blooding my lips.
loving you tastes of salt and iron,
what a balanced palette for dining on a soul.