can I see your scars
he said to me
touching my shirt

my cheeks turned pink
I was dizzy
and embarrassed

his pale lips touched them gently
he smiled

No this isn’t a katy perry song
But lets figure out what went wrong
From the mistakes
Just for our sakes
When I wanted to die
You’ll make me want to shine
When I want to hide
You’ll take me for a ride
When i feel hate
You’ll show me im great
But why are you gone?
You weren’t next to me at the break of dawn
In another life?
Would we make it right?
Or would you be there on the other side?
Waiting for me to be your bride?
But you left
With the rest
I can’t be here alone
I can’t even call you on the phone
You haven’t left me instructions
And so far its been self destructions.
I see you leaving
And im just here grieving
But before was I naïve
Did you have a plan up your sleeve?
Before all the plans we made
Did our love just fade.
I don’t want you to leave just stay
Don’t be the one that got away.

Your eyes, the windows into your soul,
Look dark and frightened as you stare
Out the window of the bus, which
Seems to be going nowhere you know,
And you carry in your mind’s eye
The image of the crucified man nailed
To a door in a village, some hours back.

Another you saw in the local church
Hung up high above your head,
His plaster figure nailed to wood,
His features chiseled into the guise
Of pain, but you never looked again,
You always turned your face away,
Until today, when the other was hung
A few feet from the ground with
Rusty nails, with distant sounds of
Gunfire filling the wet noon air.

The bus pauses, you look out to see
If another may be hanging from some
other tree, or if some one will bring
back your father from the men who led
him away, so you may see him smile again
Through the window and downpour of rain.

She knows she’s in
the sepia photograph
but doesn’t remember why
or who the others are

or why she dressed
as she did back then
or why there was a dog there
at the front

she keeps the photograph
tucked between
the pages
of the black Bible

some clergy gave her
and a dark secret
she was forbidden to tell
and sometimes

that short woman
with the Mongolian features
steals it to gawk at
then she has to go get it back

sometimes violently
which brings the nurses running
with their rough hands
and strait jackets

or that skinny woman
who always stares
takes hold of it
and stares at it

pointing to the various faces
of the males and females
and at the dog
and smiles and wets herself

and then laughs loudly
which causes
the other inmates
to bellow or laugh

or cry or scream
bringing the nurses trotting
with their what’s going on?
or what’s all this then?

she holds the photograph
to her ***** when she can
or tries to remember
who they all are

staring back at her
including herself
and when the quacks
question her

about the photo
as to who is who
or why she has kept it
she doesn’t have a clue

and one said
she ought not to have it
as it disturbed her
but a nice nurse

(and there were some) said
o no doctor she needs that
there will be hell to pay
if she doesn’t have it

tucked between the pages
of the Good Book
she kisses herself some days
talks to one or two

of the others there
but who they were
or to whom she speaks
she doesn’t know

and on cold wintery days
she looks toward the sun
for a message
or a warming glow.

Chattering teeth
Quivering bones
Splintering veins
Unconscious zones

In and out
Ghostly and pale
Pain and terror
Weak and frail

Spiraling,
Buckling down to the floor
Worrying,
Panicking about why I'm sore

This crucial sharp feeling deep down inside
Kicks the hot heavy tears from my eyes
I don't remember being pealed off the ground
But I appreciate you being around

Personally stripped of all my senses
Creating a fear so sensitively severe
Trembling hands that want to be held
Wishing desperately for you to come near

Splitting headache
Weary eyes
Drifting conscious
Hidden cries

Pillow's comfort
Seeking sleep
Choking sobs
Counting sheep

Scared to death for what's to come
What if I never wake
Thoughts filled with death and dying
This night I might not make

Sleeping sleeping sleeping forever
A dream that never ends
This has never occurred before
Scaring the **** out'v my friends

Scary thoughts
Problem'r listless
Perpetual possibilities
Scared shitless

I think you set me on fire
I mean
We were a match, right?
And our kisses were gasoline
I didn't realize it sooner
But I am much more flammable than the others
But you struck the match
Instead of keeping it forever
You thought it would be beautiful to watch our passion burn for a moment or two
I am naught but ashes now
I can't sleep
But
Every time I close my eyes I think of you
And I sneeze so often from the dust particles left behind that it's a lot more often than you'd think
I tried to fit myself into an urn for you
But I have this bitter feeling in my dark remains
Because we both know I am no longer beautiful enough to be kept
So I will cast myself across the ocean
And perhaps I will rise
Like a Phoenix
And let the wind carry me on

I just,                                                            ­                                                                 ­                                           
         really,                                      
                   kinda,
                             sorta,
                                       feel like,
                                                  I have this urge to-
                                                             ­        ugh, i don't know-
                                                           ­                             kinda weird,
                                                          ­                                        but all I want
                                                                ­                                              to do to you,
                                                            ­                                                              lik­e,
                                                              ­                                                    at this very moment
                                                          ­                                                                 ­         is
                                                     ­                                                                 ­                   well ..
                                                              ­                                                                 ­                   

                                                                                                                                                     hold your hand.

Matter cannot be created or destroyed
Is love the same
Has it always existed
In one form or the other
If so
My love and I
Well
We have loved forever (we just hadn't found each other)
And forever is a circle
Which means we never began and we will never stop

On the wooden frame of this bed
Lie all the secrets in my head
With the keys to the metaphors
Resting in the crystal glass drawers
Where illusion is prophecy
And the god is hypocrisy
Like a soft dream I never dreamed
With the terror that never screamed
This cradle is the infancy
Of the lies of my fallacy
So burn the skeleton of rest
In the fire within a chest
That beams a golden hue of truth
And eradicates every tooth

Now you shall Speak with no bite
Now you shall Sleep with no fight