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you see those numbers
big and ugly, on crumpled paper
and you feel them on your skin
like a stain on yourself, on
who you are, who you'll ever be

shame

it wraps its hot hands around you
its whispers harsh and sharp
in your ear:
"stupid. stupid. stupid"
your new heart beat, pumping
hot blood around your body
burning you on the inside
and you scream,
desperately wanting
to come out and be
someone else, someone smart
someone that just isn't you

you failed. this is it. you're done.
they were right about you.
you're just a stupid, ugly,
worthless. hopeless...

....Beautiful, brilliant
wonderful girl.
Your daughter looks away,
burning with embarrassment.
"You'll do well", you say,
"Just try your best.
And even if you don't
do as well as you'd like,
you'll still be my smart little girl"
"Thank you" she says, and disappears again
into her room, to study
You sigh, hope, pray, beg
That she believed you

More than you ever believed yourself
Pheeeew. My first poem in ages. I missed poetry, I swear. As soon as exams were over (literally on my last day) I went on Hello Poetry. Hope you like this one. Please tell me if it needs a little more meat...it does feel like its missing something, you know?

Thanks for reading <3
I watch their footsteps
I listen to their laughs
Sometimes I wonder why
They keep joking about love.

I walk into the classroom
The boys are being rude
The girls are gossiping
Sometimes I wonder if
I fit in here.

I sit on the desk, preparing myself
The teacher comes in
He looks very tired, like I'm
Sometimes I wonder if
He wants to die--like I'd.

I start the exam, numbers are running inside my head
I look around to see if everyone's noticing
I look down at the paper and
Pull out a pencil from
the pencil case and
Stab my throat.

While the blood are rushing on my shirt
and down to my legs
I wonder why
They keep joking about love.
I get very tired after the final exam, and i wonder why they're still joking about love.
1540

As imperceptibly as Grief
The Summer lapsed away—
Too imperceptible at last
To seem like Perfidy—
A Quietness distilled
As Twilight long begun,
Or Nature spending with herself
Sequestered Afternoon—
The Dusk drew earlier in—
The Morning foreign shone—
A courteous, yet harrowing Grace,
As Guest, that would be gone—
And thus, without a Wing
Or service of a Keel
Our Summer made her light escape
Into the Beautiful.
We learn to hold hands with life.
Through good times
And bad.
She doesn’t sugarcoat,
Yet she loves
In her own way.

Oh, and when you looked me
In the eye
And said you wanted to die -
To let go of her grasp,
I saw her cry
And beg for your forgiveness.
Smile and laugh
My typical my code to fit in
Not sure how I made it
Or why I feel like it doesn’t work

I walk with my group
Split off from my best friends
But are they really friends if they abandoned me
I don’t feel joy here
I’m just trying to fit in

I also feel happiness
I’m like a broken clock still making the ticking sound
I wonder if it’d be different born fixed
Or if I’d still think the same

The person I am
It doesn’t really apply anywhere
I know I never have
I think I never will

Just trying to fit in
Make myself a character to keep around
Cause I’m not a person
Just an object to use and hate

— The End —