Writing to fill this void
A darkness that grows darker
With each passing day
Like the rays of the sun
Slowly fades away
Having impulsive thoughts
Fighting a war long been faught
Between mind ,body and soul
Not wanting to hurt
So you bleed
Knowing you're still breathing
You say you don't want to end
This merry -go- round cycle
Of wanting to stop
This madness
To feel the bliss

Long walks
On my own
That no-one knows
The demons i face
Long walks to clear my raging mind
Long walks to feel alive
In the middle of the night
To feel calm in the dying of the light.
Long walks to figure out what to do with my soulless life.
Long walks to know my heart is still living within my chest.
Long walks to distract the voices in my head.
Long walks in order to forget my dark ,brooding past.
Long walks in order to know i am
Still alive.
Long walks to keep moving forward.
Long walks for everything to be normal with no drama, fears or tears for the ones we love.
Long walks just because.

What's happening to me
Feeling this droughts
This numbing feeling
That grows deeper by the day
A year has gone
Yet i still feel
The pain you left behind
Still see the bruises in my mind
The scars that remained
Forever etched in my life
One moment i smile
Next I'm crying
Feeling like dying
Seeing my momma sad
For myself getting bad
Yet again falling out of touch
Losing my mind
Forgetting who i was
Becoming this breed
That's not supposed to breathe
The pain forever engraved
For all eternity
I cannot forgive
For i lost myself in what was
And not what will be
For i am me
Fighting for a breather
To remember and forget

My legs are moving
In a direction
Of the unknown
I go left
I go right
I'm completely out of sight
Do i go on.
Or do i rest
Wait till the clock strikes.
There's so much noise
How do i focus
To know
The one that leads me back
In the noise
I Inhale, exhale
A storm is brewing
In this chaos
Where does one hide
In this consuming madness
I have this light inside
Should i ignite
Become the flames
And rise above
To seek ,To find
Become an traveler
Till i am home.