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your compliments are overwhelming
never have I felt so much love, so validated
it feels like a ticking time bomb, too good to be true
I'm not used to this feeling, and I don't know if i'll ever be
strangers across the screen who may be miles away
nicer and kinder than the people I call family and friends
why do you take the time out of your day to compliment my words and sentences?
why do you say such nice words although you don't know me?
Lumim, CJ Sutherland, Liana, Sora, friends and supporters I've made here
And so many more
Thank you
Insomnia is a thief that steals my sleep
The hours and minutes tick by, an agonizing reminder that sleep won't come
Like the ouroboros, my quest for sleep consumes me
Insomnia traps my mind in a restless cage
The moon never sets in my mind, an eternal sunny day mocking me
Like the ouroboros, my struggle for sleep loops back on itself
Insomnia places me in a dark maze without escape
The hours I spend awake feel like an eternal road with no start or end
Like the ouroboros, we both devour ourselves endlessly in our despair
Insomnia keeps my mind turning over and over, and I never settle into sleep
I haven't been diagnosed with insomnia, but with my sleepless nights I've started to think I might have it
The mirror betrays me
Its reflection only shows my flaws
Is that really what I look like?
Is that what you see in me?
Is this all I am?
"a mirror reflects one's true self."
That's what you said
Is it true?
Am I an ugly, repulsive, hideous monster?
I miss you
I love you
I’m drunk
and I can’t think straight

My world is falling apart
Because I can’t stay sober without you
From as far
Back as I
Can remember,
Always wanting to know
More about
Certain people

Their
Enthusiasm,
Was addictive,
What made it so?
A need to know

The deeper I'd go,
Mystery
Would
Flow

Their favourite book,
Hungry eyes,
Take a
Look

Music was always
The one,
"What's you're favourite album?"
Lyrics
Told a story,
But interpretation would
Fragment,
The message sent

The bigger
The age gap,
Better the story,
Making me wish
To be older,
Experience those days

Living antiques
To show,
Pocket watches
That
Wind up
With a
Key,
Lockets with loved ones
Enclosed,
Rings that changed colour!
The tick and tick,
Of The
Grandfather clock,
Like a Living man
Stood in the
Hall,
Showing
Moon and sun,
What power,
Chiming on the
Hour

The unfriendly
A challenge,
But still...
Get
Under the crust,
Persistence a
Must,
More often than
Not,
Gold in the ***

Wisdom from
The wise,
A rewarding
Prize

To the
Timid and afraid,
Please be
Brave,
Open up those
Hidden gates,
Always someone
Who
Relates

Song for this, my grandfather's clock.
My grandfather's clock was too large for the shelf,
So it stood ninety years on the floor;
It was taller by half than the old man himself,
Though it weighed not a pennyweight more.
It was bought on the morn of the day that he was born,
And was always his treasure and pride;
But it stopp'd short — never to go again —
When the old man died.

Ninety years without slumbering
(tick, tick, tick, tick),
His life seconds numbering,
(tick, tick, tick, tick),
It stopp'd short — never to go again —
When the old man died.
In watching its pendulum swing to and fro,
Many hours had he spent while a boy.
And in childhood and manhood the clock seemed to know
And to share both his grief and his joy.
For it struck twenty-four when he entered at the door,
With a blooming and beautiful bride;
But it stopp'd short — never to go again —
When the old man died.

Ninety years without slumbering
(tick, tick, tick, tick),
His life seconds numbering,
(tick, tick, tick, tick),
It stopp'd short — never to go again —
When the old man died.
My grandfather said that of those he could hire,
Not a servant so faithful he found;
For it wasted no time, and had but one desire —
At the close of each week to be wound.
And it kept in its place — not a frown upon its face,
And its hands never hung by its side.
But it stopp'd short — never to go again —
When the old man died.

Ninety years without slumbering
(tick, tick, tick, tick),
His life seconds numbering,
(tick, tick, tick, tick),
It stopp'd short — never to go again —
When the old man died.
It rang an alarm in the dead of the night —
An alarm that for years had been dumb;
And we knew that his spirit was pluming for flight —
That his hour of departure had come.
Still the clock kept the time, with a soft and muffled chime,
As we silently stood by his side;
But it stopp'd short — never to go again —
When the old man died.

Ninety years without slumbering
(tick, tick, tick, tick),
His life seconds numbering,
(tick, tick, tick, tick),
It stopp'd short — never to go again —
When the old man died.
If mental scars
were rungs
on a ladder
It would
stretch up
into heaven
 Nov 11 CJ Sutherland
Crow
she is light
I am shadow

the sun calls to her
and in return for her devotion
lives in her voice

gifts her
with his smile
allowing her the use of it

she invites his embrace
he marks her as his own
with tender bites across her shoulder

always she seeks him

in his radiant domain
is her joy

my shaded world
where I find comfort
chills her

the tenebrious realm
sings to me
in the key of solace

echoes in the darkened chambers
summon her fears

she shivers

I return her
to the warming luminance

our hands clasp
half in light
half in dark

connected across the boundary
we blend
into one
 Nov 11 CJ Sutherland
Crow
I sought to pierce the astral screen
discover things which lay unseen

existence layers to strip and peel
all cosmic secrets to reveal

with book and spell I tore the veil
beheld all things beyond the pale

creatures that rule the land of Leng
ghoul’s midnight feast, the yellow king

fungi that steal and eat men’s minds
horrors made gods that sit enshrined

the gates of mortal souls open wide
to blasphemous things that crawl inside

I descry the future’s dark corridor
where the stars are an endless sepulcher

and now I know my folly’s curse
my reason slips, my thoughts perverse

I must escape and look away
lest in this charnel house I stay

but I cannot stop through act of will
my vision seeks, strains further still

the last recourse causes gorge to rise
I must be free from these hell born eyes

the knife clutched in my shaking hand
I gouge and stab my sight be ******

and for a moment I am free
but then I am brought to my knees

o’ gods of pain and fear abhorred
my sight but clearer than before

all vision now within my mind
I would bless who could make me blind

with eyes which cannot close or hide
forever gazing and open wide

nor even death will seal them shut
on these horrors my soul must glut

my body fades I cannot die
and eternally through madness fly
A Halloween item. In honor of Mr. Lovecraft.
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