What do we know but nothing about anything
and everything about nothing
we continually perpetuate the lie
our fathers father told him
and his father before that

the only old religion everyone still prays to
is hate while ignoring
the oldest religions of love
and love is too kind or too caring or too nice
to complain that we never call anymore
except to complain about
the things and people and work we hate
and as soon as we get
a more important distraction we hang up
making hollow promises to call back

we never do until the **** hits the fan
and someone cheated on someone
and someone lied to someone
and someone lost their job
and someone lost their mind
and someone wants to die
and someone went through with it
and now they are dead

love does what it can
and says what we need to hear
but we drift off from the conversation
because we weren't listening in the first place
and we push love aside again

because we hate how much it hurts
and we hate everything about anything
and anything about nothing
and we hate ourselves most of all
but we do our best to deny it
as we paint plastic pill coated smiles on the mirror
and repeat our daily mantra of "I'm ok, I'm ok, I'm ok.."
as we ignore the tears of our reflection

we don't answer the phone
because we know who's calling
but we're late to church
and an angry god is a hateful god
so we better hurry
and get down on our knees
and kiss his ***
for all the beautiful hatred
we use to keep ourselves apart
from each other
and most importantly
to keep ourselves away from love

We shared our organs in the space of one body, one mind, one soul;
I kept yours dear,
Made sure to
Squeeze a piece of me a bit closer to make room
For you -
All of the credits were to you
This physical need to be near
To struggle and push, to not give in to fear
And all of the time I spent saddened to see
The old me go
Left you.
It left you on a lawn of stray twigs
Searching for the old me
The one that you devoured
No,
I didn't spoil and I wasn't savored.
You wiped your hands and mouth clean so easily and I
Well, I made a liar out of you.

Hate it when I know
And I don't know
Same time

I am what I said
I meant what I said
But I don't know
What I just said

Hate it when I know
And I don't know
Same time

I remember
The sad days

Now I'm
Living dead