Misunderstood love comes common now a days
To begin to know or figure it out would be insane
Luckily lovers share the same brain
Waves merging to create  an illustrious codependent maze

Is it bad I don't educate myself?
I have desire for the books on the shelf
Yet I want others to read about me
It's  apparent I create my own irony
Hire me hire me I want them to see
What I have to say and what I want to do
Between me and you I have a lot to prove
Stick and move my writing rides on with the groove
Like the fads that entertain me and you
I'm trying to be as trendy but can't hit the viral brew
A concoction to spread like wild fire I desire
Kindled fire higher power fame lasting longer than an hour
Is it too much to ask? So much time has passed
It's when your dreams get up and start running you pursue
All those things you been searching for is right inside of you

The feeling, I couldn't explain
It's like I've been with you all these years
Like I've been going through the motions despite my fears
Of being alone, you make me feel ok, ok right at home

All I wanna do is look up at the clouds
Let the days float by with a chance of rain
If I could have you on this rainy day
We could wash away our problems all our pain
Just look up at the clouds and start a new
A new we knew could come true

You use to have envy that you deserved but you threw it away without knowing what it was you told me I was your final chance at life you told me you would do it with a knife that night you ruined
For me just for attention and though you never speak to me anymore did I mention i had wish her life had come to an end there's no reason for your existence you don't deserve to be eaten by worms buried alive and left to squirm for the life I saved in vein just Do it already don't put it on hold your diluted  sense of reality is getting old yet you still tell me you're in pain now I know you have nothing better to do than lie hope the last thing you do is cry

Memories memories go away
That's my conscience everyday
I make overthinking seem like a chore
You only hate when you do it more
Keeping me up late looking for security
Wishing my hands were full of yours and you right next to me
Sip life straight out the bottle and enduce
A time where time stops ticking and tocking an impossible truce
Unable to let go of your daily habits
Lay down on your mattress toss and turn from the madness eye lids peeled open from the sadness  
To think when I didn't know your name yet you looked my way and I couldn't fake it but
I have to forget before I remember
All these memories, burn deep it's the embers
All I wanted to do was love her
While my lungs inhale the smok.. my feelings are being smuthered

My life quickly coming apart at the seams
It would seem life has a funny way of takin you back to reality
Take away your natural high and shout to bring you down from cloud 9
Far from reality a really bad film
Where nothing goes right or the way you planned
Yet it's a comedy the irony, now that's reality

Writing is the music in my mind
The kind that's got you stepping
Word play done so right
My meanings will keep you guessing
About you, me, or them the question
Words light up your mind open up your third spectrum
Minds eye wide opening another dimension
Did I mention what writing is?

I saw this girl and it hit my brain
Too much to contain I thought about spitting game
But I managed to fight the urges
So I finished and continued on with my purchase
She got me feeling nervous but
Her red hair I admire  her body and attire
A smile to rock the ages, her eyes just quite outrageous
Different colors like different stages and I..
Can't help but take my eyes off hers
A color that I can't quite decipher
But I think I might even like her..
Style a bit of blue with some grey to boot
Digging all day and I think she's cute
Funny to say I met her through a couple glances
Kinda ***** I never took any chances
And I thought did she see me too?
There's really only one thing left to do..
Gains some super powers, I ain't no mind reader
I think I have to go back and actually meet her

Time keeps chasing, my disguise it wears thin,
Playing the part of one who knows it all, my sin.
But deep down, I'm aware, I know nothing at all,
Won't you open up your mind, let your thoughts befall?


How am I supposed to know,
What's hidden within your soul?
Tell me, enlighten me now,
Guide me, help me understand somehow.
'Cause you're wrapped in doubts, it's clear to see,
Your steps are a pondering walk, mystery.
How am I supposed to know,
Now, how am I supposed to know?


Share with me the secrets that reside in your head,
Illuminate my world with the words you've left unsaid.
I want to lend a hand, be there when you're in need,
But if you keep it all inside, how can I proceed?


How am I supposed to know,
What's hidden within your soul?
Tell me, enlighten me now,
Guide me, help me understand somehow.
'Cause you're wrapped in doubts, it's clear to see,
Your steps are a pondering walk, mystery.
How am I supposed to know,
Now, how am I supposed to know?


What if I tell you, your vision's obscured,
By the habits that keep your thoughts secured?
Let emotion flow, let affliction be revealed,
Break through the barriers, let true understanding be sealed.


How am I supposed to know,
What's hidden within your soul?
Tell me, enlighten me now,
Guide me, help me understand somehow.
'Cause you're wrapped in doubts, it's clear to see,
Your steps are a pondering walk, mystery.
How am I supposed to know,
Now, how am I supposed to know?


How am I supposed to know,
What's hidden within your soul?
Tell me, enlighten me now,
Guide me, help me understand somehow.
'Cause you're wrapped in doubts, it's clear to see,
Your steps are a pondering walk, mystery.
How am I supposed to know,
Now, how am I supposed to know?

Who is the real you?
trying to figure that out now huh?
Little late on that one

No matter how big you dream during all the hard times you scream but nobody can hear you there's no easy way to say I need you everyday but I can never see you  the limits are the sky I haven't learned to fly so there's no way to reach you on the phone or with these eyes but it's no Suprise no one knows the real you perfection is a test which people suit you best there will never be a you

Blizzard take me in as we disappear
Wrap me in your frosty White
Snow Blind I can see things so clear
Illuminate the sky with your snowy light
Cover the world to make us know
The world is kinda pretty with all this snow

How I've wished this water was whiskey
In my absence, will "they" miss me
The world around me moving quite slow
My life would be over if this water was alcohol
How I wish someone would look up to me, a role model
I keep these unseen feelings in an internal bottle
Ready to drink, water to ***
If this water was alcohol my life would done

I wish I never fell for you
Hands on my chest to keep my heart from jumping out
Your name your being you're all I want to talk about
But I don't get it, you don't even flinch
Life's hard for you and harder for me since
You said my name and we shared a kiss
I am pushed aside because of someone else
My eyes stray while you have your way
All I want to do before you leave is say
I wish I never fell for you

when you love for real it's so different than the idea of itself
It's not this huge burst of passion all at once anymore
It's an everlasting, lingering, a smell you recognize on the other persons clothes  type of feeling

Do you see yourself in a picture with me?
Picture perfect, happy as can be...
No shred of sadness, yet always in dismay
Like a bright star in the sky, the apple of our eyes
Having what others yearn to one day grasp
But first, can we take a picture?

On those chilly nights we spend so close with our hands intertwined
Like I was yours and you were mine I still feel my heart skip from your touch
Your love to me was never too little or too much
We've ended those days with those fowl words that run trough my head in the day
That feeling of your love will never go away

One day I swear I'm going to write my way out of hell
It's only a matter of time but only time will tell
Bigger things are coming but I have to build the blocks
Because the opportunity never comes if you stop
That's why I'm writing this, this hear is my good faith
To tell myself never to stop if this is my dream hell, it's time to chase

This was always a hobby and an outlet for me to vent
But as of lately I've had my creativity spent
Due to lack of sleep and constant stress
I just want to get my life back together, but right now it's a bit of a mess
Nothing I can't handle but believe me it's no walk in the park
Especially when there are no lights to illuminate this path in the dark

Every night I think about what I should do, but never do
That's my biggest flaw I'm eating procrastination soup
Not because I'm sick, but just a little under the weather
I use to say they couldn't rain on my parade when I'm made of umbrellas

But now the clouds seem to be parting I can seem my next my skies limit
I just hope this time I listen and try to live it

I stared at the empty seat, nothing to hide
I feel so **** lonely without someone here by my side
My eyes become watered, but not filled with tears
A drop of sorrow mustered, but not shed
Time spent thinking rather than doing, wasted
What I want I can't have but we all covet that the most
A sick twist of fate or a game we all play
We all have to learn how to stand and walk on two feet
Better start crawling

My victory was all but small
It was different with you I wanted it all
We gave each other a shot in the dark
But in the daylight was where I was lost

I couldn't see, the outcome of what we've done
Of my words, and oblivious actions, who would have thought
Not me, trouble came knocking, winded and distraught
Not on my end, I couldn't hear it

I took what's meant for only us to know
And put it out there like a public tv show
For all to see and all to hear
I'm most sorry, can you see this?

My victory so small, boasted, not sure why
On my brain thinking, thinking, wait did I...
I did, it slipped out one too many
I only hope for my thoughts to be worth more than a penny

Bang my head on the wall
Just to forget it all
Nothing seems to fit
Like a puzzle piece out of the mix
I can't handle this struggle alone
I need to borrow your strength
To dig me out of this hole
Full of sorrow and problems galore
Without you it feels like a chore
Going down my list to see if I have the problems
Solutions no where in sight, no way to solve them
You held the remedy, the cure, the key
I make a scene no one to look and see
Why did you leave and not leave with me?

Your Words* use to mean something to me
They use to mean everything to me
Now they are nothing more than a slap to the face.
A constant reminder if you will
As to why we will never be the same
Best friends turn to best foes
Why we aren't together nobody knows
All you do is talk about things you want to do with me
At the end of the day just words I see
No actions or attempts to see each other
Not my fault neither yours
Actually I blame myself for letting you in
I could have kept going and let you do yourself...
NO I couldn't just sit back and do nothing
My love for you had nothing to do with it
I wanted to help so you could keep going
I remember when it was I saved you, it was snowing
So cold, so late, your life, our fate
I thought ahead, you thought for the now
and now I see where we stand, where I stood
and to think I thought I could..
I couldn't save us only you


*No Regrets