The Silence Apr 8

All representations of life and death cross
To create a duel meaning
Holding the farthest folds of time together
Seam to seam.

A contradiction to being
The reality to burn through my own
My mind welded tight to refuse it.

A hole finds its way to my center
Eat away at me, will you?
My knowing and my conformity.

Take together the farthest folds of my mind
Tie them
Seam to seam.

As life is said to be too short
I cannot speak my complaints
Fore I have only experienced a fragment of 16
Cut from the whole of what I am to be.

The flower in me buds and wilts
Exposing a vibrancy of colours
But one force takes the importance of all.

To signify the moment of opening my eyes
The first birth of my existence.

The fade is subdued until the light reaches its end
The end beyond death
Where the white of the lily glows bright
Because life lives beyond the physical deterioration
Commonly accepted by reason.

To break these boundaries of understanding
I stand with one foot in each ground
The light in my left side
Signifying my birth
Rebirth and rebirth.

The life constantly recycles itself in me
Coming to the surface in a new skin each time
The lily means Easter
A new beginning

Before my first fragment of living
I came to my first renewal of being
Halfway across the world
A resurrection to the arms of who I now call my family.

This sunday of Jesus' Easter
Was taken to the use of my own
This sunday
I took my first breath
As Lily.

The light opened my being to life
A new life
With each came a new contradiction.

The petals that once were lain so gently on my skin
Fell away
Laced together with fine strings of me
My growth, my knowledge, my understanding.

A continuum of time
Slowly taking its destructive path
Finding its way to my center.

The right side of me
Which I have not forgotten since spoken of
So many existences ago
Takes footing in reality.
The happenings of death
Necessary to take its toll before birth
Rebirth and rebirth
Leads the light in me to falter
To take cover amongst the shadows.

But as a renewal of life blooms the bud once wilted
These deaths call strongly to me
The lily of life
Represents equally a devotion to the departed.

Fragments of my being were experienced in deprivation
Losing the light a lily so desperately depends on
Moments taken advantage of
Where the death digs deeper into me
It closes in on my center.

Repeatedly the light recedes far enough
My left side falls weak
I grow in dependence of what little left of me stands tall
My right sides firmly planted in the grounds of death.

Seemingly an end to all I have once known
The lily drops its last petal
I close my eyes.

My center is open
And in me

A new light is revealed
A new bud is in bloom
A new being of me has been born
Reborn and reborn.

The white light radiates new strength
New knowledge
New understanding.

As I am raised to stand tall
To set my left foot down
To take footing in the light
But I find balance.

I realize that I cannot stand at all
Without the right foot planted firmly in death
In what has led me
To all that I am
And am to be.

My mind expanded beyond any reason once reached
Filled with contradiction
And a new lily's light.

I am able to see the farthest folds of my mind
To find them tied tight once again
Seam to seam.

Another assignment from English class. We were asked to write an inventory of being for ourselves after reading Walt Whitman's *Song of Myself*
The Silence Apr 8

Something I have not quite understood
As to why it is part of Christmas.
Tis the season,
For fruitcake.
A little bundle of squishy undercooked bread
Stuffed with candied fruits and nuts.
The loaf of
No thank you...please.
Though seemingly undesired,
The dessert reigns on.
Wrapped in clear plastic
So that you may marvel at its artificial glory.
Tied off with a bow.
Ready to be received by those you love most.
Tis the season,
For fruitcake.

I realize it is far past Christmas but it snowed yesterday. It seems appropriate now :)
  Apr 8 The Silence
Addison May

I don't think people understand
Nobody does
No, I am not saying this in the typical teenager
Nobody understands me ahhh way
I just mean that, as the truth
Nobody understands what others are going through
The phrase I understand people take to a different level,
of believing that I've had this exact experience
When the truth is,
Nobody has had the exact same experience as anyone else
Because that's human nature, that's life
What bothers me more, is when people say
My experience is worse than yours
Oh that's bad, I'm sorry but this happened to me and this is why its worse than what you experienced
You have no idea what is going on in this persons head,
so how can you say that what you had happen is worse?
Even if you don't outright say this,
that's exactly the impression that it gives off
You don't have the right to say who's experience is worse
this person is hurting,
and trying to "one-up" their pain
is not going to fucking help
So if you go to say this
shut the fuck up and sit the fuck down

The Silence Apr 6

What does it really mean to betray someone?
What if the someone means something to you?

"Friends don't go behind friends' backs to talk about them"

But that simply isn't true.
Human nature of relationships is crossing lines and building walls.
These wounds can be healed.

A true friendship has its ups and downs.
A true understanding has flexible limits.

A true betrayal occurs without reason.

For the common good of others.
And the protection of what's right.
To push aside the hypocrisy.
And to sacrifice yourself.

This is what draws the line.
Separating the right and the wrong choice.
To see the outcome before the strike.
Thinking through each move you make.

Holding on until the end.
To not betray someone called friend.

The Silence Mar 30

In elementary school
we had

We were small children then.

Now we put stuff
in our

We pronounce that as cubberds

Now think of how many times
you have added  "ies" to a word
when speaking to a small child

Do you have your sockies?

Where did you put you stuffies?


Put your backpack in your cubbies

Mind = Blown
The Silence Mar 28

Man does not carry all he needs
Nor is he given such things
Nature was foolish in caring for her creation
Leaving man with independence
And nothing else.

Argued that man is given men
Beings of the same likeness
Meant to teach
To protect
To clothe.

This is what is expected
Possibly what Nature had intended
Though her will is not wholly taken
All men do not act for man
And man is left naked.

Nature acts in attempt to love
But she gifts in an unsystematic manner
From the eyes of man that is
The perspective of tortoise reveals independence
And all else.

Granted longevity in each life
Built with instinct in each body
Guaranteed to teach
To protect
To clothe.

Nature gave tortoise a suit of armour
And left man in the hands of men
But men can be broken down
From the many
To one.

Man can find compassion for one
Fulfilling the needs of another
One who has wondered like man
Who has feared with man
And lain cold at man's side.

Nature never could have predicted
That her foolish creation
Could rely on the service of one
Fore as men were argued to be made for man
Man was left alone

To teach

To protect

To clothe

And all else.

This was one of many reflections for English class. "Clothe the Naked"
  Mar 28 The Silence
Addison May

I have Salt
Salt Salt Salt
Salty Salt
for Chem

Tribute to a good friend of mine
RIP our minds in AP Chem
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