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 May 2014 Tee Jay
Riley Lavender
Love
isn't always LOUD
and EXPLOSIVE

Sometimes
LOVE
is a quiet voice in the back of your heart
A voice you almost didn't hear
A voice that tugs at you and says
*"Pardon me, but I'm here."
 May 2014 Tee Jay
Sam Conrad
**** that noise.
Forget about her.
She's full of ****.
You don't need her anyway.
I can't believe this terrible **** happened to you.
It was all so unfair.
It's been like 10 months. Why aren't you over it?
**** her. Move on.
Wow. What a ******* *****.
Isn't it finally to the point where you just don't care, where you finally say "**** her", and move on?
Yes.
No.
Kinda...
I don't know, anymore.
I can't believe it either.
Beyond unfair...
Good question.
I can't...I can't.
I don't know what she is, anymore...
No, I don't think I'll ever get to that point. I'll just sing Coldplay and cry for the rest of my life.
 May 2014 Tee Jay
Sam Conrad
I'll be a broken record until the day I die,
I need to move on but I just won't try,
Though the day I die I'll learn to fly.
 May 2014 Tee Jay
Sam Conrad
The boy inside my head remembers the girl inside yours.
He wants to tell you that he still loves you...that he'll love you forever.
He wants to tell you he's trapped and all alone.
He sits in his cell scratching the days onto the wall.
He draws pictures of your face and imagines holding your hand.
If he ever gets to talk to you again, he pictures what he'd say...
He would do anything for you to give him another chance.
He knows he's a boy and he wishes he didn't have to be.
But that boy inside his head didn't get a say on if he got to be a boy or not.
He wishes that you'd open yourself up to let him care for you again.
He wishes that you'd let yourself be the reason that he lives again.
He wishes a lot.
He wishes too much.
He fears none of them won't come true but he can't stop because it keeps him alive.
He envisions that chance. That he would take it slow and show you his love.
That it would be the deepest display of emotion ever to come from him.
He knows all too well you're not fond of boys- he's almost sorry he is one.
But he loves you. He loves you so much. You're so beautiful to him.
A beautiful person, not a beautiful girl.
He misses you.
He misses you so much.
The world stops when you hug him.
His heart flutters just thinking about it, still.
You're heavenly to him. You took him places he'd never been before.
Places he may never be again.
You see, he wishes he could put into words for you, the feeling...
He never needed anything more than your cuddles and hugs.
Like a living, breathing, soft and loving security blanket, you were...
Nothing in his life ever more peaceful than your arms or the touch of your lips.
He never needed ***...please don't make it about ***...
What he really needed was you.
He prays to a God he no longer believes in that maybe he could have a reason to believe again.
He loves you, Elizabeth Raine. He loves you so **** much.
He knows that's not enough.
He will never be enough.
You were once the reason he lived...
You're now the reason he wants to die.
You dumped him like utter trash and he still couldn't get over you.
You said things that ripped out his soul. Acted like he had no soul to begin with...
But ******, he loved you. He loves you. Like he promised, he always will.
Your girly parts play no part. He wishes you'd understand how much deeper this is than that.
How much you mean to him.
How much you'll always mean to him, how you'll always be his sweet girl.
At least, how he wishes you'd be his sweet girl once more.
He wishes he could show you...that he could find a way.
Tears roll down his face like the first rain of May.
He just wants to be enough to experience heaven one more time...
I'm afraid to inform him that heaven's long gone...
Its not even in existence to experience anymore...
But he'd **** himself...I can't push myself to let him know...
He bought a ticket to hell.
I love you. I miss you everyday. I hope you're doing fine. I hope she treats you well.
I wish I could sleep forever so I could go back to your arms again.

I hope you're not reading this. If you did, you just hugged him.
Just know it gives him the best feeling in the world, even still.
He tries so hard to forget he wants it everyday.
 May 2014 Tee Jay
Sam Conrad
She and I...
We sat on an island alone.
Nobody around her wanted me around.
Nobody around her supported keeping me around.
She got put with me on an island.
She promised me she loved me.
She promised me a lot of things.
We promised each other.
We promised not to let the others get us down.
We promised we could do this...("this" never happened...)
We promised.
We...
When...
When it came down to only us,
I found trust I didn't even know I had.
I trusted her then more than I had ever trusted a **** thing in my life.
I trusted her more than I will ever trust a **** thing in the rest of my life.
I found in her a peace I had never felt before.
I thought her and I were going to build each other up again, together.
I was so ******* determined to help her.
I was going to die before I let her down.
She kissed me. It was the deepest kiss I'd ever had with her.
Next week she was gone.
Next week she didn't love me.
Next week she said she hadn't loved me for a long time.
Next week she didn't love boys anyway.
Next week she had a girlfriend.
Next week I tried to die.
Next week I tried to die.
Next...
Who even gives a **** about the weeks after that because I'm still sitting here alive. Nobody cares about how or if I feel anyway.
I'm really pretty ******* dead and she's happier than she's been in ages.
 May 2014 Tee Jay
Sam Conrad
There's a lump in my throat
Seven Nation Army is playing
And I'm talking to myself tonight
Because I can't forget
How she took her time right behind my back
And it goes back and forth through my mind
As I sit behind my cigarette
The tears dropping from my eyes scream
"Leave it alone"
The terribly thump in my chest
It won't leave me alone
Jack White, you're a genius.

I talk to myself and an image of her in my dreams more than I talk to other people combined.
 May 2014 Tee Jay
Melissa
Referendum
 May 2014 Tee Jay
Melissa
Divided by choice

Our votes a collaborative voice

shouting out- for or against change

Ask and you shall hear a flurry of

thoughts, slurs and worry

*"We are stronger together" or " we are better apart" *

We remain divided
the 'undecided'  are fair game
hurried to succumb to a decision -
with no revision
of the facts.
 May 2014 Tee Jay
Daan
She skates
 May 2014 Tee Jay
Daan
I feel her grip fading, slowly is
she leaving, hopping off the ice.
She says it didn't go very well,
but I couldn't say.
Speechless,
because she was so pretty,
impressed,
because she was so talented,
touched,
because she looked divine.
It hurts to think about it,
to accept she'll never be mine.

Time will pass and she'll forget,
we'll drift apart like we never met,
to me it's more than sight,
I have dared to love her with all my might
and cried because it didn't work.

I don't know what to change this time,
choice, my appearance, my act,
my voice, my talks, my jokes or walks.
What did I do wrong, this time.
She's gone
 May 2014 Tee Jay
Brianna
Her
 May 2014 Tee Jay
Brianna
Her
I play softball,
She comes to my game,
She starts playing softball.
I'm a catcher,
She's a catcher.
I'm first base,
She's first base.
I'm pitcher,
She's a pitcher.
I'm agrivated,
She's amused.
I'm taking lessons,
She's taking lessons.
I'm not a catcher,
She's a catcher.
I'm a pitcher,
She's not a pitcher.
Copy Cat.
I join a team,
She joins two teams.
I practice hard in my backyard,
She claims she does also.
I admit I take lessons,
She refuses to admit the fact that
She takes lessons because

She's untrusting.
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