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2.0k · Nov 2021
golden threads
Teodora Pavel Nov 2021
golden threads this autumn bears
waves of thin despair at your iron door
Show Time, says Fosse, heart on the floor
when sunlit window gently flares

a crispy wind, a frivolous sunrise
oh, dance along, your fragile neck so white
Show Time, says Fosse, aglow with light
please, dance with me, and look into my eyes

golden threads this autumn bears
in every leaf, in every grain of dust
Show Time, says Fosse, it's my final lust
melancholy's dripping venom deadly glares.

"Autunno, se vuoi cogliere la frutta della mia anima, ti prego di non esaurire ancora il sole, il filo d'oro della vita, il filo d'oro della danza." - Gianluca Masi, known as the Dancing Alchemist, Firenze, the second half of the XVI-th century
Teodora Pavel Jun 2022
There is an arrow, locked away
somewhere, silenced
My heart has felt it, its caress
True consolation of one's life
That arrow, buzzing vibrato
after so many windows of my soul,
will break your chest, will
strike you dead with no notice.
950 · Sep 2021
rain
Teodora Pavel Sep 2021
this September may rain embrace
your shallow skull, your wounded smile
may rain embrace your cristal voice
your shallow skull, your wounded smile

deep buried in the bluish sky, clouds of forgiving dew
pour silence into nothingness
may rain embrace your skull, your bones
soft as thin paper lost beneath the ground

soft as a kiss your mouth once moaned upon my lips
and never found again poison as sweet
deep buried in the Prussian field the bluish corpse
dissolves itself under the stars

this September may rain embrace
your shallow skull, your wounded smile
may rain embrace your cristal voice
your shallow skull, your wounded smile
Teodora Pavel Jul 2022
Au, norii/Aïe les nuages/Ay, Las Nubes/Ouch the Clouds

et maintenant où sont les nuages blancs
qui ne savent pas rêver
qui ne peuvent pas voler, sans le vent du nord,
sans les coeurs des hommes.
(7.08. 2016)
255 · Jul 2022
High-Fidelity
Teodora Pavel Jul 2022
Ode at the Tomb of the Unknown Lover
                
The white muslin shadows of the
curtains reveal no secret.
Behind the French-windows, the garden vegetates:
A perfect parking place for her Rolls-Royce.
Peace. Warm afternoon. Fresh peaches.
Tell me what you see, move your eyes,
"Red lips on the white carpet" - and
a shade of orange at the corners.
I saw her make-up as she was looking
at the painting, cold and distant - she wasn't even there -
Still naked, a few minutes later.
She lives in that painting, I know now.

She put her clothes on and left the room.
And every Rolls-Royce has its own parking place.

Empty bedroom. Two empty cups of tea. Cold sheets.
Helpless cushions on the floor. Cold sheets.

Two cats are playing chess in the middle of the room,
They are moving the pieces with a magnetic blink of eye.

She left the room to get some ice-cream from Antonio Fresco
and promised to return.

Who drinks the best chocolate in town?
What is the distance between Argentina and NY?
Who is the third cat that can play chess?
How many gardens has she visited?

I'm playing this question-game to pass the time,
Laid on the white carpet and waiting for her.
Mockingly, she used to call me "High-Fidelity".
254 · May 2017
Tuesday
Teodora Pavel May 2017
Between yesterday and tomorrow
you breath heavily, drinking the milky sunset.
at your door, indifesa creatura, you find only peaceful adoration
knock knock too late to knock too late to tick time has run out
Between yesterday and tomorrow
there is a certain fatigue in your brains
I wish these hours never passed, with too much thirst
Thirst for sunlight, thirst for unknown fields,
visibile in the sky slit by lightening
Between yesterday and tomorrow
the present moment ceases to impress,
already gone, already painful,
like you could never feel the frail infinity
hidden in the transient touch of our lips.

2.05.2017
211 · Jul 2017
Untitled
Teodora Pavel Jul 2017
Untitled

Waterfalls circle the purple mirror, inside foggy shadows
Your visage, so small, so fragile, reflects itself into the clear dew
Another morning has arrived, with longing, without anything new
Dusty trails that lead to the same house, even if everything changes
And nothing ever stays the same

Brick layers shine and glitter inside your burning brain cells
Love has never been more savage, more bitter, more addictive
I forgot all prayers directed to the icy wisdom of his purity,
And replaced them with a litany of sober dignity, more like a bow,
More like a chant, faithful reminder of serene, infinite sky.

His mouth, tasting like moist soil, melted into a dying smile.

Dusty trails that lead to the same house, even if everything changes
And nothing ever stays the same.

9.03.2017
200 · Jul 2017
Friday
Teodora Pavel Jul 2017
No iron can pierce the heart with such force as a period put at just the right place.
                      Babel’s maxim

Freezing inside golden jars,
They’re trying to recover their senses
Within bluish immensities of solitude
Nothing can escape this intensity,
a buzz of nothingness among
deaf animals trying to escape,
to recover their senses
they die, they sleep, they laugh, they weep
but no one can see them,
no one can hear them
Fatigue encircles them in a sunny cage
made up of trillions, and trillions of jars
they cannot die, they cannot sleep, they cannot laugh, they cannot weep
Tell me if you have something to say
when plain breeze revels in your innermost self

plain breeze upon delicious icy rocks,
killing every whisper, every lie
And this windy torment you cannot deny
as the snowy season nests inside
There are musicians dying all around
Complaining about the absence of all sound
I know, they are the worst of all,
Disbowelled, with dry limbs, they climb and fall

Death, golden, frozen, with no music
Exposed a hidden harmony through the immensity
of that transparent garden, covered with snow
Following the image of every prayer,
Useless objects, that used to be human-animals
spell their own despair upon skyless
roofs, an offer that no one would recognize,
a blaze of glory for immortal eyes

But who am I to turn to these dry bones,
a coronation of a sacred simphony
That would be heard, repeted, played for all eternity
If only some lost angel found his name, or found his rose.
Frankfurt, 21.10.2016 (Friday)
185 · Mar 2022
Funeral March
Teodora Pavel Mar 2022
Blindfolded by love, I ran into you, when hope was gone
completely, gone for so long, but still waiting for something
to happen, as if listening to a deaf song,
as if I had been deaf and mute, but still feeling the pain,
the longing of hearing, speaking and singing again

You found me numb, deprived of life, inside a shell
feeling nothing but the sea, blue, soft, the velvety of death
lying on that couch

I'm home, I'm home, you said, in a whisper
that turned mirrors into dust
and then I saw you, blindfolded, in the cold,
carried away by waves to a distant shore,
unable to hear, to speak, or sing again

Between us the flame
Between us the water, intertwined like music and silence
like two bodies that once used to be one

I'm home, I'm home, you said, in a whisper,
but what is a whisper into a dead woman's ear?
180 · Apr 2022
Morning Haiku
Teodora Pavel Apr 2022
My heart just has sunk
into my espresso cup
It needs to be filled


morning Haiku
132 · Jun 2022
Parsifal
Teodora Pavel Jun 2022
Everybody loves you, but me, madly in love with you

embraced in this tango, we burn, we glow, we whisper flames
Argentinian Variations taste like dark coffee in this pure night
you are the most beautiful, I am the usual smitten

stray cats imitate milongas in the garden, this June,
as if I expected all this unbearable happiness to last, this June,
as if the pomegranate blood of the sky will be the same tomorrow

I just need you to not let me go, not yet, not just yet,
before the Moon dies, before you close your eyes

The music has stopped, my darling, I read your lips
you are the most beautiful, I am the usual smitten

The waves into the distance measure passion,
with their soothing tempo
do not caress my hair, do not kiss me one last time, this is adieu

embraces like thin air vanish, clouds drink my love like rain
your shadow lingers above the sand, your body over mine
completely forgotten

you are the most beautiful, I am the usual smitten.
y

— The End —