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Tatiana Sep 2018
Who I was would attack who I am
And who I am would attack who I was
One day I hope to be someone
Who finds peace within themselves
And they can look back on their past selves
Smiling for what once was
Smiling at my growth
I just want myself to know
That regardless of my many mistakes
I'm proud of who I am
And of who I will become
I just wish for myself
To stop fighting myself
Constantly
I wish for my selves
To be at peace
To accept that they exist
Within me
I am who I am
I am who I was
I am me I always will be

And to reject that
Would be devestating
© Tatiana
Tatiana Sep 2018
The cranium persists even with a bruise on my brain.
No, I do not wish for an ounce of pain
    and no, I do not feel like I am a strain.
There is no malintent that flows through my veins.

The rib cage persists even with a bruise on my heart
No, I do not wish for both sides to fall apart
    and no, I do not feel like I am able to restart.
There is no malintent that flows through my art.
© Tatiana
Tatiana Aug 2018
Travel under the eastern sky
keep your eyes on the road, do not ask why
that barren landscape, the color of rye
makes the hardened townspeople cry.

Legend states that the dusty flatland
was a servant to the sun so grand
the sun demanded amusement from the land
and the land created the dance of the sand.

The sand would fly throughout the desert space
for the sun to bestow her grace.
The act would make a storm and erase
any proof of fate and leave no trace.

The townspeople never spoke of the event,
but you must know what happened to an extent
when small ones run away at the advent
of these storms, the sands erase all torment.

You must vow to not wander from the road
when the sands hear the sun's lovely ode
and feel the need for a storm to explode
to dance and bury us all, as the sun foretold.
© Tatiana
Hey hey I actually wrote this one before my concussion so with a couple of edits (and after much rest) i'm ready to post it. A part of me feels like there is an 'I' somewhere in here, but I'm fairly certain there isn't. I think my use of sounds that sound like 'I' are confusing me lol. No 'O' is next.
Tatiana Aug 2018
The drums' pounding sounds
echo deep in my chest
rattling my rib cage
a new heart beat is found.
I surge with the crowd
dealing with the push and pull
like it was the ocean.
Well we were on Ocean Avenue
So it sort of was.
People are being held above the surging waters
like boats floating on treacherous seas.
One boat emerges from the depths behind me
One that I did not see.
The next thing I knew
the head of the boat had hit me
connecting with the back of my head.
I turned around quickly
and pushed the boat along,
but by then the damage was already done.
I sang and danced to every song
Unaware until later of my new concussion.
I'm putting my "Forgotten Vow(el)s" series on hold as I am now concussed. I was at a punk rock concert, seeing bands such as Against Me and the Bouncing Souls. A girl was lifted up behind me, and started to fall onto me, hitting the back of my head with her head and that did it. This is my second concussion and I'm very annoyed to have gotten another one. So if you are going to punk rock shows, be aware of the risks mates. But also, go to punk rock shows because they are a blast.
Also I'm realizing now I could have said surfers instead of boats (bc crowd surfers lol), have I mentioned I'm concussed?
Also please excuse any obvious mistakes for obvious reasons.
Tatiana Jul 2018
In my thoracic cavity is a clock
that rhythmically sounds tick, tock.
Pumping blood through my body
giving my hands an opportunity
to point out a good quality
And a fault.

It is good that you know I am with you
but a fault is found in this sad room
as sounds of this hospital's gloom
absorb into my aching brain
I almost miss your words full of pain
what you said will always stay.

"I think of days of old
days of gold
days that told
us to cling and hold
onto occasions
that you and I had.
Days I thought could not go bad
  Days I thought could not go bad."

Your clock ticks, but it would not tock
arrhythmic palpitations hold your body in lock
arms turn into stiff, limp imitations of parts
your body can find out how to start
its own trip into that forlorn dark
with no comfort from a singing lark.

I'm no lark, I bring no comfort of dawn
but I'll stay up with you as you yawn.
Your soul's windows full of worry
build up this notion your light will go in a hurry.

I vow to you as your light grows old
that you and I had days of gold
that you and I had days of gold.
© Tatiana
This is sad and trying to avoid the letter 'e' is extremely challenging.
No 'I' is next
Tatiana Jul 2018
Follow the odd northern winds
with just some sense of indifference.
Do not become glued to the ground
its toxicity will weigh you down.
So push yourself up, fly with the wind
twist, turn, spin with the debris.
Twirl with those stuck in the breeze
enjoy the feeling of weightlessness
the kind the ground never could give.
Fly through the sky, throughout the night
do not stop even when it becomes light.
It is best to ignore the ground below
since it is not good for you, trust me, I know.
I just need you to vow to me right now
don't look down
don't look down
don't look down
© Tatiana
oh boy oh boy this is difficult
No 'E' is next.
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